lollipopspot Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 That surgery is expensive, dangerous, painful and takes many months. I can't believe anyone would recommend that, especially since people on this board tell women not to have any cosmetic surgery that is far less drastic. He can get a shoemaker to make some Tom Cruise ankle boots with built in lifts. Oh no, I don't recommend it. I've just seen some glibness about changing other features (like a nose - "easily fixed"), as per my earlier post, and I don't think height necessarily deserves a lot more special consideration than changing these other features surgically or otherwise. A lot of people aren't going to want to resort to surgery or a lot of time and energy consuming effort to change their features, even if they really dislike them. 1
somedude81 Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 Oh no, I don't recommend it. I've just seen some glibness about changing other features (like a nose - "easily fixed"), as per my earlier post, and I don't think height necessarily deserves a lot more special consideration than changing these other features surgically or otherwise. A lot of people aren't going to want to resort to surgery or a lot of time and energy consuming effort to change their features, even if they really dislike them. Getting a nose fixed is a far simpler process than getting leg lengthening. Even then, a woman would have to have a pretty horrible nose for it to affect her dating life. While a man only needs to be under 5'8 for things to get much harder. There are also far more short men than there are women with serious facial issues.
lollipopspot Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 (edited) Well, if he wants it badly enough, I guess he can do it. Same as if a heavy girl wants to date you, she can lose weight. For a lot of people, it's not that easy. I don't think that height is that different from a lot of other physical criteria. I personally know someone who almost died from a nose job. Surgery is serious. BTW, I'm into a guy who's probably somewhere between 5'5" and 5'6" (my height), and it doesn't bother me at all. But if he were overweight (assuming still active) that probably wouldn't affect my feelings about him either. One isn't necessarily more shallow than another. Edited December 28, 2013 by lollipopspot
somedude81 Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 Well, if he wants it badly enough, I guess he can do it. Same as if a heavy girl wants to date you, she can lose weight. For a lot of people, it's not that easy. I don't think that height is that different from a lot of other physical criteria. I personally know someone who almost died from a nose job. Surgery is serious. I'm sure it is. Frankly I think it's ridiculous that anybody would have to get surgery in order to have success in dating. As I said earlier, I really doubt there will be a situation where a woman has a physical appearance issue that is severe enough that it prevents her from dating unless she was in an accident or something. While a short guy was just born with short genes and that severely limits his dating chance. Let me put this another way, which is more common, short guys or ugly women (non-obese)?
starla33 Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 What do you guys think about dating a guy who is extremely short. I'm 5'3 and he's 5'3. It kinda weirds me out because he's also relatively muscular as well. Yes, I know it sounds shallow, and personality should mean more. But seriously, thoughts? I'm around your height and I can't date a guy under 5'10. Most guys I have dated are 6ft....I just like being thrown around and can't deal with guys that are the same size as me. Call me shallow all you want, but it is just something I'm attracted to. 2
lollipopspot Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 Let me put this another way, which is more common, short guys or ugly women (non-obese)? I happen to be a slender female (who is completely fine with "short" guys, if you see my above edit). But I have a friend who is obese who has been dieting since she was a small child. Basically on a diet, her whole life, and she's still obese. It is NOT easy for everyone to lose weight. There can be a whole host of metabolic and emotional and other health issues that make it very difficult for some people. I can't judge anyone for weight, and say something like - 'you could lose weight if you wanted to' - not knowing more about their situation. There are a lot of things that make people unattractive that are not easy for them to change, even if it might seem that way to you. 1
somedude81 Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 I happen to be a slender female (who is completely fine with "short" guys, if you see my above edit). But I have a friend who is obese who has been dieting since she was a small child. Basically on a diet, her whole life, and she's still obese. It is NOT easy for everyone to lose weight. There can be a whole host of metabolic and emotional and other health issues that make it very difficult for some people. I can't judge anyone for weight, and say something like - 'you could lose weight if you wanted to' - not knowing more about their situation. There are a lot of things that make people unattractive that are not easy for them to change, even if it might seem that way to you. It's great that you are fine with short guys. Women like you are very rare. Most women are like starla33. Yes some women have issues where it's very hard to lose weight. Most women can lose weight. I feel bad for those that put in serious effort but are unable to. Guys can't become taller without surgery.
lollipopspot Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 O.k., but I don't think "shallowness" is to be judged on how easy one deems it is for the feature to be fixed. It's not less shallow to not want to date an overweight woman than it is to not want to date a short man. It's all shallow, and people have preferences for whatever reason. 2
silicone Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 I'm give the advice of a short guy who is just an inch shorter than the guy in question, i.e I'm 5'2". I, like most men, do not want to feel settled for. I do not want to put time and energy into a relationship which has such flaky foundations before it has even began. The fact that you are questioning yourself, but also that you need to seek others' opinions on the matter is not a positive sign. If I were the guy and I had found out that you had reservations based on an immutable trait, I would be very cautious about this relationship. 4
somedude81 Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 O.k., but I don't think "shallowness" is to be judged on how easy one deems it is for the feature to be fixed. That's exactly what I'm trying to argue. I believe it's shallow to reject somebody because of something they were born with who otherwise look completely normal and have nothing wrong with them at all.
silicone Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 I'm give the advice of a short guy who is just an inch shorter than the guy in question, i.e I'm 5'2". I, like most men, do not want to feel settled for. I do not want to put time and energy into a relationship which has such flaky foundations before it has even began. The fact that you are questioning yourself, but also that you need to seek others' opinions on the matter is not a positive sign. If I were the guy and I had found out that you had reservations based on an immutable trait, I would be very cautious about this relationship. Now it's bad enough that the majority of women won't date me because I am short, but I am not desperate to enter a relationship on such conditions. Moreover, I do not see why I should be in a relationship where I am defending uncontrollable aspects of me.
lollipopspot Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 That's exactly what I'm trying to argue. I believe it's shallow to reject somebody because of something they were born with who otherwise look completely normal and have nothing wrong with them at all. No definition of shallow that I've ever seen has anything to do with how changeable some feature is. 3
MrCastle Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 @somedude -- most women are not like starla33. Trust me. Shallowness is not a trait found in many women. 3
somedude81 Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 @somedude -- most women are not like starla33. Trust me. Shallowness is not a trait found in many women. I hope you're right. All I know is that I'm a bit under 5'6 and I got my first girlfriend at 31. If it doesn't take as long to get the next one, maybe I'll start getting rid of the short guy complex.
lollipopspot Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 All I know is that I'm a bit under 5'6 and I got my first girlfriend at 31. I wouldn't even think twice about that height. There are lots of guys who don't date until later. Are you doing other things to make yourself attractive to women, and putting yourself out there? Is it possible you are attributing some of your lack of success to height, when it might be due to something else that you can more easily change?
MrCastle Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 I hope you're right. All I know is that I'm a bit under 5'6 and I got my first girlfriend at 31. If it doesn't take as long to get the next one, maybe I'll start getting rid of the short guy complex. I've dealt with enough women, short and tall, to know this is not an issue. Like I said, I went 25 years of life without so much as hearing about this height thing, until joining loveshack. Surely if it were a big deal I'd have experienced it or seen it sooner. It's almost exclusively an online thing -- and I would tell you, when you do see those kinds of women on here -- to take note of their relationship status, and their character overall. Most of them are chronically single and/or not someone you'd want to date to begin with.
lollipopspot Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 Like I said, I went 25 years of life without so much as hearing about this height thing, until joining loveshack. Just curious, how tall are you? 1
MrCastle Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 Just curious, how tall are you? 5'7 (10 characters)
BillJJ Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 To be honest, I used to stir my current girlfriend about being short when we were younger and she is the same height as you and your boyfriend but I come to realise height isn't that important so it is up to you.
Eternal Sunshine Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 I dunno why that would bother you. I am looking for a genuine connection and height is irrelevant. One of the biggest crushes of my life (my boss) was an inch shorter than me and I am 5'8".
CrystalCastles Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 I've dealt with enough women, short and tall, to know this is not an issue. Like I said, I went 25 years of life without so much as hearing about this height thing, until joining loveshack. Surely if it were a big deal I'd have experienced it or seen it sooner. It's almost exclusively an online thing -- and I would tell you, when you do see those kinds of women on here -- to take note of their relationship status, and their character overall. Most of them are chronically single and/or not someone you'd want to date to begin with. ^^^THIS^^^ I'm 5'11'' and I've been attracted to guys a few inches shorter than me, plus any body size- fat, stick thin, muscular, you name it. If you're truly interested in someone, you're not going to get hung up on unimportant details like height. At least I found that was the case for me. I sure as hell wasn't thinking about how tall a guy was when he was making me laugh so hard I'd almost pee myself. 1
FineFreshFierce Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 Question for those who think it's shallow for a woman to not be physically attracted to a short guy: Is it only considered shallow if the woman is shorter or the same height as the man? Or would you still find it shallow if a 5'7 woman rejected a 5'3 man?
MrCastle Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 Question for those who think it's shallow for a woman to not be physically attracted to a short guy: Is it only considered shallow if the woman is shorter or the same height as the man? Or would you still find it shallow if a 5'7 woman rejected a 5'3 man? I think, when someone has everything you're looking for, and you have chemistry, but you can't date because of one physical trait that you find lacking -- I mean...I don't know what you want to call that.
Eggplant Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 When you're really infatuated with a person, you get lost in that person, and what anybody else might be thinking is irrelevant. I dated a guy who was only an inch taller than I. He liked it when I wore heels, and so did I. 1
MalachiX Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 You can label me as shallow if you need but I'm just being honest. I am 5'2" and 120 lbs. I do not find 5'2" men attractive,not saying it makes anything wrong with them, just saying I am not attracted to them. If someone doesn't find me attractive because of my height , so be it. That's fine. I'm men who refuse to date a woman because she has small boobs or because she's not blond, or not super-skinny will say the same thing. I just don't see a lot of women defending these guys. We've seen on this thread that there are a lot of different opinions and many women have no issue dating someone the same height (or even slightly shorter) than they are. What surprises me is women who seem to have a problem with men who think a woman's body/attractiveness is all that matters yet don't seem to have any issue completely dismissing a guy for his height. If that's being shallow, then I am shallow. Why do people write stuff like this? I remember a thread from a few months ago when a guy said, "if me thinking it's wrong for a white woman to date a black guy is racist, then I guess I'm racist." I'm also not attracted to hairy men, men with man boobs or pot bellies, un-groomed facial hair, dirty fingernails and elbows that look like an sos pad.......... It's kinda annoying to have people equate one's height (which one can't really control), with other things that depend a lot more on hygiene and taking care of your body. Almost kinda feels like you're blaming us for being short. It's kind of like a guys saying: I'm just not attracted to women with smaller breasts. Call me shallow. I also don't like women who are INCREDIBLY overweight. Women who put on so much make-up they look like prostitutes. And women with hair all over their body. Height really isn't as comparable to grooming and fitness as you make it seem (just like boob size isn't). 1
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