When does age gap become "creepy"?

[RedRobin]

Not creepy, but a guy who wants a woman that young is shallow and lacks character. There is a huge difference in maturity between 22 and 30...I have alot of men in my family around the age of 30 and they require women at least 25 or older because so many 22 year old women say they are mature and are not...people grow up alot between the ages of 20 and 25. Not only that, the guy clearly is going after her because he thinks she is hotter than females his own age and less "used up." Alot of older men when they give me reasons why they seek out younger when I call them shallow, older women have them too. I know plenty of older women without alot of baggage, who are fun/friendly/carefree, who are active and like to go out. Bottom line, older women arent seen as "screwable" because of their age. Its unfortunate, but a woman's desirability is tied to her age and looks. I also think older men like younger women because younger women are more naiive and are more likely to tolerate their BS.

 

 

^^ This. By dating much younger women, these men can stay stuck in their unhealthy emotional state forever. It is infortunate that these men are somehow viewed as 'role models' by some women... instead of the (emotional) losers they really are.

 

 

If these men really wanted to be role models, they would stop sexualizing relationships with much younger women and find other ways to contribute... or work on themselves so they can attract a similar age, healthy woman who is his equal.

[BlessYourCottonSocks]

First of all...what is the definition of age?

 

Age: the length of time that a person has lived or has existed.

What does that have to do with being a suitable partner? I rather focus on loyalty, health, commitment and how much this person can offer me in a relationship. Are they stable? Are they mature? Are they intelligent? What are their goals/ambitions? Are they funny? Are they respectful? Do we just "click"?

 

[[i mean, considering we are talking about people over the age of 21. I say 21 instead of 18, because at 21 you can legally drink. Why date someone you can't go out and have a beer with?]]

 

Anyways, let's pretend we all didn't know the age's of other people. The question is, what would stop you then? Certainly not the time they have spent here on earth.

 

Plus, I know a lot of people who are 40 and look 28. And I also know people who are 25 and look 40! Age is just how long you have been on earth. It doesn't equate to how you take care of yourself and what kind of person you are.

 

I am 24. Tonight, I'm going on a date with a guy who is 32. But looks younger than my most recent ex who was 29. I also once dated a guy who was 36 when I was 23. And he had a full head of hair and looked in his 20's!

 

Like they say, Age is nothing but a number.

 

BUTTTTT.....I have to agree....dating a guy the age of my own father would just be really weird.

[melodymatters]

Bless your cotton socks ! That was a great post ! I have a 32 yr old cousin who has basically never worked in his life but "has" to live in San Francisco, one of THE most expensive cities in the US, and mommy pays for it. My husband in his 20's has worked since he was 13 and is more sensible and mature than my 70 something father. It's not the time on earth that makes someone smart, or sensible or a good partner, it's what they did with that time.

 

And you're right, half the time by looking, one wouldn't even know. My H and I thought each other were both early 30-mid 30's, it wasn't until we were already falling for each other that we realized Whoops ! And then, I kept trying to put the brakes on, but it seemed...absurd to turn away from warmth and friendship and love and connection, based on something that didn't matter until a certain data set was revealed.