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I think I like my 2nd cousin..

no1likesme

By no1likesme
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no1likesme New Member

no1likesme

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Hello loveshack, I hope everyone is having a merry Christmas.

 

So I met this girl about a month and a half ago at my parents house. When I first met her I didn't think of anything at the time except that she was very cute and pretty. She told me she was my cousin... from her mom side? We both have the same last name. I'm not too sure if we are even cousins? Definitely not first cousins though.

 

She came to Canada about 2 years ago from Asia. She first moved to Toronto and just moved to Vancouver about 2-3 months ago. About a month later she met me.

 

We chatted a bit on the first day we met. I got to know her quite well. The next day she came over to my house for a family house party. At the end of the night she asked me for my number, and I was very flattered lol.

 

As the weeks go on, we hung out here and there.. So I asked her to go out this weekend for dinner.. and then she asked me if I wanted to go to the club after? I then said sure. Now I'm kind of worried of what might happen.. I mean we are getting quite close.. and it's quite dangerous I think considering we are related somehow and that we can only go so far? I mean she keeps saying that she'll be there as a cousin, but she keeps giving me signs like calling me cute and stuff. I mean I compliment her too.

 

And if we were to have protected sex.. what would happen afterwards? Would it be awkward for us? Damn its true.. You want what you can't get..

 

Any advice is welcomed :)

Edited by no1likesme
Maxtor Established Member

Maxtor

Posted
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I know a girl that had sex with a 2nd cousin. Her reply to me?

 

"I dont care, not my fault i had a sexy 2nd cousin."

 

lol.

 

I dont know man, 2nd cousins doesn't seem bad.

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no1likesme New Member

no1likesme

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Hmm not my fault I had a sexy cousin..

 

haha good excuse!

 

I mean we both wouldn't openly date because of what our family tree would think... but it seems like we both want to make love to each other.

cobeflats Member

cobeflats

Posted
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Unless you are from Alabama or Tennessee or are Amish, I'd say find another girl and make contact less frequent. Probably not the best idea to proceed down that path and with time/less communication, your desires will subside considerably.

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Mascara Established Member

Mascara

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Second cousins are removed enough to not be illegal. In fact, it's legal just about everywhere to marry your second cousin, including all of the United States.

 

Of course, that won't stop some people going "ewwww, banjos", but that's mostly ignorance.

Bigcitydreamer Established Member

Bigcitydreamer

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Really you are that desperate that you are willing to sleep with a family member?

 

I wouldn't be able to do it no matter what. Find someone else for goodness sake.

cobeflats Member

cobeflats

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I think desperate is a little harsh. Treat it more in the context of a gateway drug. First it's your 2nd cousin...no big deal. Then it's your first cousin. But before you know it one day you are finding yourself waking up next to your sister and wondering how did it come to this. I'd let it go...there are other fish in the sea that are not relatives and will promote you contributing to a more diverse gene pool.

Edited by cobeflats
TylerDurdenn Established Member

TylerDurdenn

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Really you are that desperate that you are willing to sleep with a family member?

 

I wouldn't be able to do it no matter what. Find someone else for goodness sake.

 

That's harsh. Can't help who you like regadless of circumstances.

 

OP it's legal, and if it makes you happy go for it.

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no1likesme New Member

no1likesme

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hmm I wouldn't say desprate.. I mean I'm a pretty good looking guy who turns heads a lot when I'm out. I live in a city where most of the girls here are materialistic and stuck-up.

 

I guess it's because she is a very sweet, drama free, and non-materialistic girl. And it's quite hard to find one in this city who you can really "connect" with.

 

I guess it's true though, I can find one with all those traits who is not my cousin.

Edited by no1likesme
superb Established Member

superb

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Maybe you're finding her more exciting because it's forbidden in your mind and in your family. Some people enjoy dangerous and secretive relationships.

Eggplant Established Member

Eggplant

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With your 2nd cousin, you share a pair of great-grandparents. I think you're fine; I give you the green light. ;)

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no1likesme New Member

no1likesme

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Maybe you're finding her more exciting because it's forbidden in your mind and in your family. Some people enjoy dangerous and secretive relationships.

 

That sounds about right. So what do you think I should do?

Onethirtyeight Established Member

Onethirtyeight

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Yes its legal but it will make things complicated. You figure your parents grew up with their parents as cousins and likely had some form or a relationship with her as a kid and she might even think of your parents as an aunt or an uncle. That's how it is in my family at least. I would be beyond disturbed if I had a kid that went for one of my cousin's kids.

 

People say don't have relationships at work? This is going to be orders of magnitude more complicated, especially if you're drunk and hook up and someone regrets it later. I wouldn't do it if she was the sexiest woman on the planet.

 

Aside from that I'd be surprised if she's actually hitting on you and not being nice. Go to the club and see what happens, maybe hit on a chick there and try to use her as a wing (wo)man. If she helps good for you, if she sabotages it you know there is a problem.

Onethirtyeight Established Member

Onethirtyeight

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hmm I wouldn't say desprate.. I mean I'm a pretty good looking guy who turns heads a lot when I'm out. I live in a city where most of the girls here are materialistic and stuck-up.

 

I guess it's because she is a very sweet, drama free, and non-materialistic girl. And it's quite hard to find one in this city who you can really "connect" with.

 

I guess it's true though, I can find one with all those traits who is not my cousin.

 

Please do, you'll have less drama.

deathandtaxes Established Member

deathandtaxes

Posted
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Unless you are from Alabama or Tennessee or are Amish, I'd say find another girl and make contact less frequent. Probably not the best idea to proceed down that path and with time/less communication, your desires will subside considerably.

 

 

 

Come to Nashville and say that, you jackass.

 

 

Nothing wrong with dating or marrying a second cousin. Nothing wrong with marrying your cousin. The taboo is when you wanna go **** your sibling.

writergal Established Member

writergal

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Cousins used to marry each other all the time. It was common practice and not taboo at all. The only taboo that remains is when first cousins marry because their genetic material is more closely related than second cousin genetic material. Everyone jokes that people in the UK are all distant cousins, same with people who live in the southern states in the U.S. Why? Because cultural times have changed in the past 200 years, that's why.

 

Edit: It's legal to marry your first (or any) cousin anywhere in the UK still and anywhere in Europe. The U.S. is the only country in the world that places restrictions on cousin marriage. Why? Because we're prudes.

 

Trivia: Albert Einstein, Charles Darwin, President Abraham Lincoln and President Theodore Roosevelt married their first cousins.

 

And for you religious people: According to the Bible, God supposedly commanded all cousins to marry. It's speculated that Joseph and Mary were also 1st cousins. (LOL)

 

Also, it's speculated that we're all cousins. No two people are not related somehow.

 

 

Check out these cousin marriage laws: Cousin marriage law in the United States by state - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

Facts about cousin marriage | Cousin Marriage Resources

 

When Cousins Get Married - ABC News

 

11 State Laws About Marrying Your Cousins, From Strictest to Loosest - 11 Points

 

Go Ahead, Kiss Your Cousin | DiscoverMagazine.com

Edited by writergal
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Bigcitydreamer Established Member

Bigcitydreamer

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That's harsh. Can't help who you like regadless of circumstances.

 

OP it's legal, and if it makes you happy go for it.

 

No it is definitely desperate. You can absolutely help who you like. I have attractive family members too, I still would never look at them like that. There are millions of people in the world, no need to sleep with a second cousin.

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