tman87 Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Ok so me and my ex has been together for a year and a month. We had our ups and down but when we were together we were good. I did everything for her even paid $1000 to get her car fixed after a car accident after only 5 months in.. Anyway we were fighting for the last 30 days so things were really rocky.. We just went out on a date 2 weeks ago and argued a day after that and haven't seen each other since... Fast forward 2 days ago I guess she saw that i was talking to a female friend on my page she told me not to contact her and that she was gonna work things out with her ex.. I assumed this was to get me mad because her and her ex hated each other. then the next day she said oh well you can talk to whoever you want because I have someone else... So finally the next day "yesterday" I called her begging her telling her that i wanted to be with her and everything and she basically told me that she wants nothing to do with me and wants me to go away for good.. Then she says that she just wants to be free and want to be single. I know all the go away stuff she was saying was because she was pissed at me.. so I didn't think much of it but decided to respect her wishes and let her be. Today I got to her Facebook to see that low and behold she's in a relationship!! WHAT??!! After the whole rant of wanting to be single and now she's in a relationship. The kicker is theres no way she was talking to the guy for no more than 2-3 weeks tops.. On top of that he has 2 kids with 2 baby moms and I have a better job than he does.. She's only 25 with no kids. what does she see in this guy to commit so fast?? I did see on her Facebook that she said someone was saying all the right things and such....I'm guessing this guy smooth talked her...I did the wrong thing again today of confronting her about the lie, after one response from her she stopped responding to me so I blew up her phone begging and pleading for her to delete the relationship status and to give us another chance and don't throw away a year blah, blah, blah... did not work. I even brought up the angle that he has 2 kids and she still didn't respond.. Im going crazy because I don't know what to do.. I want her back, And I'm thinking if I go NC she'll forget about me.. Another kicker is I always tried to get her to put she was in a relationship on Facebook with us and she never did.. but with this new guy she did it with no problem.. kinda hurts...Do you think this is a rebound because we was just together at the beginning of the month and this is all so sudden? also with him having 2 kids It hope it will help my situation. I need to make sense of this.. All experts in this field or had experience PLEASE HELP ME!! Do I have a shot getting her back? I want her back and this guys is in my way
Author tman87 Posted December 23, 2013 Author Posted December 23, 2013 The thing is I know NC is the only option. It just hurts that she's moved on so quickly and claiming him on facebook already... I read somewhere though that relationships that starts like that fail.
headinthecloud Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 The thing is I know NC is the only option. It just hurts that she's moved on so quickly and claiming him on facebook already... I read somewhere though that relationships that starts like that fail. This is why you need to go NC. Read the links in my signature, they're a good starting point. 1
Christ is Love Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 You must give her all the space that she requires or ask for. If she loves you and really need you in her life, she will be back . If she doesn't come back, then she wasn't right for you anyway. In the meantime, try to hang out with people who care about you. Be strong!
organizedchaos Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 You must give her all the space that she requires or ask for. If she loves you and really need you in her life, she will be back . If she doesn't come back, then she wasn't right for you anyway. In the meantime, try to hang out with people who care about you. Be strong! Agreed. And OP you must unfriend her on FB to spare yourself more agony. 1
Author tman87 Posted December 23, 2013 Author Posted December 23, 2013 Thanks guys. Do u think she got with Themis guy so quickly less than a month because she really like him? Or is it because she was trying to get over me? I hope it's just a rebound because I don't want her to fall in love. She even put in a relationship.. That's the biggest part that stings because I could not get her to do that.
Krakenos Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 I had similiar situation. After almost 3 years relationship she told me tha she love me but she cant live in my town and want to get back to parents. I said ok. Then few days later she told me it will be better if we will break up. 1 month later she changed fb status to "in relationship". It is 5th month since that. And i can tell you that at first you will want her back, but in the end you will realize that it was best for you. You will not understand why it happens, and dont try to find out bc you will only lost your time. It just happens, moreover it is better that it happens now than later in your life. After 5 months i can tell you that i'm happy that she left me. Remember NC is the key!!
Author tman87 Posted December 24, 2013 Author Posted December 24, 2013 Thanks for all the good advice guys. I just feel so betrayed. It really hurts.
organizedchaos Posted December 24, 2013 Posted December 24, 2013 Thanks for all the good advice guys. I just feel so betrayed. It really hurts. Just know that you were good to her, and that's all that matters. She won't forget that and she may come to regret her decision when she finds out other guys aren't going to treat her so well.
Author tman87 Posted December 24, 2013 Author Posted December 24, 2013 Hopefully... Idk if it's a good thing or not but me and her mom are still very close.. Even have made plans to go out to eat when the weather is better. This may work in my favor because her moms opinion is important to her.
Author tman87 Posted December 24, 2013 Author Posted December 24, 2013 She must be delusional.. After all the pain she's put me through... She had the balls to text me to ask for my netflix password.. I'm like wtf? She had to be drunk or somethin cas it was 2 in the morning. I jus ignored her
legion113 Posted December 27, 2013 Posted December 27, 2013 She must be delusional.. After all the pain she's put me through... She had the balls to text me to ask for my netflix password.. I'm like wtf? She had to be drunk or somethin cas it was 2 in the morning. I jus ignored her Boy, she sounds like a real winner.
organizedchaos Posted December 27, 2013 Posted December 27, 2013 Hopefully... Idk if it's a good thing or not but me and her mom are still very close.. Even have made plans to go out to eat when the weather is better. This may work in my favor because her moms opinion is important to her. You need to cut all ties. Don't go to dinner with her mom. This will piss her off thinking you're using her mom to get back with her.
whichwayisup Posted December 27, 2013 Posted December 27, 2013 you can't cling to her mom in hopes that one day she'll realize she wants you back. Trust me, blood is thicker than water and all she has to do is tell her mom to back off of you and not see or speak to you anymore, and it'll happen, her mom will do as her daughter requests. I think for your own sanity (right now) tell her mom that you're hurting and need some time to not be in touch so you can work through the pain and loss. NC is the only way to go and her mom is a huge tie - Obviously - And she'll (ex) will always be on your mind, or in the back of your mind if you keep in touch with her mom. It sucks, she hurt you, betrayed you and stomped on your heart. the healthiest way to work through this is rely on good friends to keep you going and to make you laugh, and to support you when you're needing a shoulder. Surround yourself with true and loving people in your life. Cry it out, write letters but don't send them. Grieve the loss and go through the stages of grief. You WILL start to feel better as time goes on. Oh and go total NC with the ex. In time it'll get easier, I know that's cliche to say but it's true. Keep busy and push yourself to not think about her. She's moved on, she doesn't miss you. That's how you must see this so you can find peace again. 2
Author tman87 Posted December 29, 2013 Author Posted December 29, 2013 So my ex texted me yesterday and I didn't respond until the next day.. Today.. She asked me what type of wireless router to use for wifi??? I got annoyed and wanted to say "Why don't you ask your new boyfriend"... But I just ignored her and still haven't responded. If she wanted to break up and me to be out of her life, why would she text me something silly that she can just google or ask someone else? Is this the breadcrumbs people talk about? 1
xUnknown Posted December 29, 2013 Posted December 29, 2013 So my ex texted me yesterday and I didn't respond until the next day.. Today.. She asked me what type of wireless router to use for wifi??? I got annoyed and wanted to say "Why don't you ask your new boyfriend"... But I just ignored her and still haven't responded. If she wanted to break up and me to be out of her life, why would she text me something silly that she can just google or ask someone else? Is this the breadcrumbs people talk about? yep..breadcrumb. move along, nothing to see here
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