Riou Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 As titled,long term relationship in this case being 2 years above. What did you guys break up over and how long did it took you to recover? 2
somedude81 Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Zero. Longest I've ever been in a relationship is six months.
CarrieT Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 (edited) Six: 1. Age 18 to 20 - Bob (broke up 'cuz college ended) 2. Age 20 to 25 - Blake (married and divorced him because he slept with another man) 3. Age 26 to 29 - Michael (broke up because he couldn't say the "L" word) 4. Age 29 to 41 - Shawn (broke up because he wouldn't learn to drive -- at AGE 40!) 5. Age 42 to 45 - Kevin (broke up because he cheated) 6. Age 47 to now - Andrew (just married him - don't plan or anticipate any others…) All of them took me some time to get over. In many cases, I rebounded into the next relationship. Edited December 23, 2013 by CarrieT 1
GoodOnPaper Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Currently in my 2nd. The first one broke off because i was the first guy she dated -- we were both 21 when she dumped me -- and the itch to find out what else was out there became too much for her to resist. In the year that followed, my senior year in college, I had three mini-relationships and that was the only time in my life I ever felt comfortable in my own skin and "successful" at dating.
Mariposa10 Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Oh god, tell me you broke up with the fourth one for more reasons and not only that... Six: 1. Age 18 to 20 - Bob (broke up 'cuz college ended) 2. Age 20 to 25 - Blake (married and divorced him because he slept with another man) 3. Age 26 to 29 - Michael (broke up because he couldn't say the "L" word) 4. Age 29 to 41 - Shawn (broke up because he wouldn't learn to drive -- at AGE 40!) 5. Age 42 to 45 - Kevin (broke up because he cheated) 6. Age 47 to now - Andrew (just married him - don't plan or anticipate any others…) All of them took me some time to get over. In many cases, I rebounded into the next relationship.
Author Riou Posted December 23, 2013 Author Posted December 23, 2013 Six: 1. Age 18 to 20 - Bob (broke up 'cuz college ended) 2. Age 20 to 25 - Blake (married and divorced him because he slept with another man) 3. Age 26 to 29 - Michael (broke up because he couldn't say the "L" word) 4. Age 29 to 41 - Shawn (broke up because he wouldn't learn to drive -- at AGE 40!) 5. Age 42 to 45 - Kevin (broke up because he cheated) 6. Age 47 to now - Andrew (just married him - don't plan or anticipate any others…) All of them took me some time to get over. In many cases, I rebounded into the next relationship. Wow..you are literally never single before since 18..don't you miss single life sometimes? 1
Author Riou Posted December 23, 2013 Author Posted December 23, 2013 Currently in my 2nd. The first one broke off because i was the first guy she dated -- we were both 21 when she dumped me -- and the itch to find out what else was out there became too much for her to resist. In the year that followed, my senior year in college, I had three mini-relationships and that was the only time in my life I ever felt comfortable in my own skin and "successful" at dating. People always think they can find better when young..
organizedchaos Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 People always think they can find better when young.. Because they usually can. 1
somedude81 Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Wow..you are literally never single before since 18..don't you miss single life sometimes? Women are only single if they want to be. Or, If a woman doesn't want to be single, she won't. There are always men waiting for their chance. 2
thecomplex Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 (edited) So true. Your 20s are not a time to be stitched up in a relationship. Save that for later and just have fun. A good relationship won't hold you back, it will propel you forward. Unless having fun is copious amounts of coitus with more than one man/woman, then it may hold you back. Also, forgot to answer the actual question. Only 1, at 19 y/o (right now), not sure why she broke up... and still recovering. Not really worried about finding someone else but it hurts nonetheless. Edited December 23, 2013 by thecomplex 1
2fargone Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Let me put it this way: No woman in my life has ever seen a christmas tree in my house twice. This includes my ex-wife, but we didn't have a tree the first 5 years we were together. A pair of shoes lasts longer than the women in my life. But I can do a very long time with a pair of shoes (at daily use). I started noticing these two things years ago....
loveiswar101 Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 43 now and only ever had 3 big ones, not even many one night stands. 19-23 (4 yrs) - Fell apart - Young got over it in few months as traveled and moved to another country. 24-36 (12 years (9yrs 11mths married) Cheated on me - Long time in real mess probably about 2-2 1/2 years as kids involved. 41-43 now (15 mths) Just left me. - I have no idea how long this will take, I hate to imagine as i know it sounds terrible but this one I really loved. Probably never will get past this. First 2 relationships I fell into but this woman I feel was different. Sad I know but I really think I will never risk another...
Omei Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 5 years - left him abusive, took 5 months to move on over a year to rid the anger. 1 year - great guy took him for granted we broke up he wanted to come back I realized I wasn't good for him at the time because of my recovery from the first, took 1 month to get over. 5 years - he gave up on us, still recovering 11 months recovery and counting.
KelC411 Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Interesting post, especially because at times like these I think we all start thinking about our past relationships. 1. 14-15, my "first love" and I dated for 1.5 years, he broke up with me for a friend he liked 2. 15-18, dated for two years, broke up because of long distance/growing apart, got back together for another year then broke up again for the same reason 3. 19-20, oof this one was a rebound and we never actually went well together, but we dated for a year, partly because of pressure from mutual friends, I think 4. 20-21, dated my first love again for about a year, broke up with him after I realized he was still not right for me 5. 21-24, my most recent, he broke up with me "out of the blue" (for me) and started dating a coworker
RDawg Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 27-28: Karen 1st proper relationship, she dumped me, wasn't really in love and recovered quickly 30-34: Belinda, bought a property together, she was bi-polar and became sick, I left her. 35-37: Lindsay, crazy girl, really messed me up, she ended it thank goodness 38-38: Willemien, nice person, dumped me due to boredom, 1st heartbreak 39-42: Lauren, bought house together, thought we would marry, became incompatible after honeymoon period,got drunk and hit her. Major trauma and heartbreak
Els Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Three Rs: Age 19 (10 months), 20-21 (1.5 years), and 22 - current (5 years +) So true. Your 20s are not a time to be stitched up in a relationship. Save that for later and just have fun. I can honestly say I don't regret at all not 'being single' in my late teens and 20s. There was absolutely nothing that I missed out on due to being in a relationship, except for fooling around with other guys and multi-dating, neither of which appeal to me. All of the fun things that I did while single, I could still do while in a relationship, and in fact in most cases I had a best friend + lover who would join me in them. 2
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Three: 1st: 3 years broke up for 10 years... met up got back together he passed away - 3 years before I met someone else. 2nd: 10 years.. no real break up just drifted apart met new people on the same day! 3rd: 3 years he left.. 6 months to get over x
CarrieT Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Oh god, tell me you broke up with the fourth one for more reasons and not only that... There were lots of reasons building up to it, but the gist is it didn't bother me when we were in our 20s and starting dating. As I approached my 40th year, I was working three jobs to keep us in a certain lifestyle while the best job he could get was as a night stock clerk at Target. The breaking point was when I was in a near -fatal car accident and he couldn't do anything to help because he couldn't drive (despite being given multiple opportunities to learn AND a car he could have once he learned). It was as we were breaking up that I learned he was functionally illiterate which was why all the begging and prodding never worked; he could never be honest with me that it wasn't the handling of the vehicle, it was going and taking the test. Even now - ten years later (at almost 50) - he still survives in this world without a computer or even a basic email account.
CarrieT Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Wow..you are literally never single before since 18..don't you miss single life sometimes? I wasn't even single then; my list was just long-term relationships. My bout of single life was from 45 to 47 - and even then, I was working the online dating world.
MoooOinkBaaa Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Six: 1. Age 18 to 20 - Bob (broke up 'cuz college ended) 2. Age 20 to 25 - Blake (married and divorced him because he slept with another man) 3. Age 26 to 29 - Michael (broke up because he couldn't say the "L" word) 4. Age 29 to 41 - Shawn (broke up because he wouldn't learn to drive -- at AGE 40!) 5. Age 42 to 45 - Kevin (broke up because he cheated) 6. Age 47 to now - Andrew (just married him - don't plan or anticipate any others…) All of them took me some time to get over. In many cases, I rebounded into the next relationship. LOL rebound city! I can't believe you broke up with someone because they didn't learn how to drive. I don't drive myself, I ride a bike everywhere I go it's environmentally friendly.
CarrieT Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 LOL rebound city! I can't believe you broke up with someone because they didn't learn how to drive. I don't drive myself, I ride a bike everywhere I go it's environmentally friendly. Did you read what I wrote above? Do you know HOW to drive? There is a big difference between not driving for environmental reasons and not even trying to learn for practical reasons. For over a decade, he promised he would try. Then I am in a hospital from an accident and he can't come see me or help in any way. Sure, he had his bike, but how did that help in the time of need?
TroubleMe Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 3... I've been married for 10 years, married very young, we broke up because we didn't love each other anymore. Then i dated another guy for 3 yrs right after my divorce, it ended due to physical abuse and i am with my boyfriend now for 6 months.
Omei Posted December 24, 2013 Posted December 24, 2013 Did you read what I wrote above? Do you know HOW to drive? There is a big difference between not driving for environmental reasons and not even trying to learn for practical reasons. For over a decade, he promised he would try. Then I am in a hospital from an accident and he can't come see me or help in any way. Sure, he had his bike, but how did that help in the time of need? A person can be supportive in time of need without a car, he didn't come because he was lazy? There are busses, bikes, he's got legs it wasn't the car it was him. Id walk an entire day away to see a injured lover<3
Mariposa10 Posted December 24, 2013 Posted December 24, 2013 Were you living in Napa Country? Public transportation SUCKS in all that area. I don't know you your ex survived there without a car. Public transportation in the United States is really bad. It's decent only if we're talking about big cities like SF, which has good PT. Did you read what I wrote above? Do you know HOW to drive? There is a big difference between not driving for environmental reasons and not even trying to learn for practical reasons. For over a decade, he promised he would try. Then I am in a hospital from an accident and he can't come see me or help in any way. Sure, he had his bike, but how did that help in the time of need?
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