SilentPrayer Posted January 5, 2005 Posted January 5, 2005 [font=times new roman][/font][color=blue][/color][color=orange][/color][color=green][/color] Dear Readers, I may have to trouble you with what I have to say. I need some help with something to do with my ex. He is 5 years older then me. I am only 20. We met 2 years ago, things were rocky in the beguining but we held it out. Then a year ago he moved away from me. I took it gracefully, no complaints. Since then we've been meeting up now and then to be with one another. The last 3 times this has happend he finds a reason to get mad at me and then he leaves town. Blocks me from msn and when I do call. He has an excuse right away to get off the phone. He acts like he care in person and the moment were apart even for a day he changes completley. I told him I loved him the other night when we were together. He said dont say that kind of **** to me. I didnt know what to say so I just lyed there motionless crying. He told me today that he left town. He is still here, Im being lied to all the time. I need to know what the **** is going on, why is he doing this...am I an idiot? please reply
Author SilentPrayer Posted January 5, 2005 Author Posted January 5, 2005 I forgot to tell you this as well. While we are apart he calls, when he is in town and were not together he calls. When he is near me, hes all mushy. Inlove and we have the greatest sex. Then when hes gone...it changes. I said one little tinny thing to kindof bother him today......I get the boot..and he tells me he left town. I also just drove past him an hour ago???? What should I do to him...I need to get back. I am not going to spend a year alone again...only waiting for him. Tell me what you think..and dont be nice. thanks
Adunaphel Posted January 5, 2005 Posted January 5, 2005 It sounds like he would like to break up with you but has not enough backbone to, so he is trying to make *you* break up with him by treating you *very* badly. Or he is mad at you for some reason. Or he has enough of the relationship. In any case, it sounds like you'd be better *without* him. He is being rude, unsensitive, and a real jerk. He lies to you. He treats you badly. Even if you aren't broken up yet, or he is not planning to, you could consider doing the break up yourself. In any case, don't put up with such horrible behaviour! ***Edit: I just read your second post. Perhaps he is unable not to see you for a long time without missing you a lot so he tries to get mad at you *before* leaving town and treating you badly when you are apart so he won't miss you too much until he sees you. (It's a very remote possibility but I knew a guy who acted like this) Perhaps he's angry at the long-distance thing(even if it was *him* who decided to move away) Even in this case, you should not put up with this behaviour. Have you tried discussing what is happening with him?
RowanRavyn Posted January 5, 2005 Posted January 5, 2005 My guess is that he has someone out of town.
Author SilentPrayer Posted January 5, 2005 Author Posted January 5, 2005 He says, Look we are apart right now. We dont need anything serious. ( I know for a fact he hasnt seen anyone since me ) I overheard his CLOSE friends makeing fun of him about it. ( They didnt know I got to the party yet ). He tells me that everytime we are together I say something everytime...it always happens to piss him off and make him not want to talk to me. When I look at it...what ive said..is usually something stinky...just to poke fun..have a hoot..and he takes it the wrong way. Gets all huffy and he wont give me a chance to exsplain. I have tried to appologise and he says whatever I dont care I have to go now. I have a really soft voice..so when we talk on the phone his voice always overpowers mine. I never get to put a word in when he is getting huffy. I dont know what to say..I know he is still in town. I know that he is at home as we speak. I dont know how to handle that he is still here and he doesnt want to spend the last night with me. please help
emmy22 Posted January 5, 2005 Posted January 5, 2005 ummmmmmm i kinda of agree with you lot BUT im married now but a while ago what your boyfriend is doing to you my hubby was doing to me he constantly lied to me but this was a issue of his past we have been together now for 6 years but he still lied,,,,,,why????????? she said i was the reason i didn't feel i wanted to know anything that he said have you spoken about this i know it would be hard but it needs to be done as things will go to far and there might not be any "us" sorry i cant say much more but good luck xx
Adunaphel Posted January 5, 2005 Posted January 5, 2005 He says, Look we are apart right now. We dont need anything serious. ( I know for a fact he hasnt seen anyone since me ) Well, *he* does not need anything serious, but what about you? Is "a not serious" relationship enough for you? He tells me that everytime we are together I say something everytime...it always happens to piss him off and make him not want to talk to me. When I look at it...what ive said..is usually something stinky...just to poke fun..have a hoot..and he takes it the wrong way. Gets all huffy and he wont give me a chance to exsplain. Does he ever tell you something to poke fun at you? If so, why he can and you can not? Unless the stuff you say hits a nerve -or is very tactless- he is definitely overreacting. I have tried to appologise and he says whatever I dont care I have to go now. He sounds manipulative (and he acts like a spoiled brat). Not talking to you or leaving to 'punish' you for something so little as a joke is a behaviour you should not put up with. If you second his behaviour, he'll end up always having things his way. And you'll keep getting hurt again and again. I have a really soft voice..so when we talk on the phone his voice always overpowers mine. I never get to put a word in when he is getting huffy. Try raising your voice. Or end the phone call once you realize that you won't be allowed to put in a word. Or inform him that you'll refuse to continue any phone conversation you'll be having with him if he starts raising his voice. I dont know what to say..I know he is still in town. I know that he is at home as we speak. Call him and confront him. Don't second his lies. if you know that he lied and do not say anything about it, and he knows that you know, it's more bad behaviour you are putting up with, and you are helping him playing games. I dont know how to handle that he is still here and he doesnt want to spend the last night with me. You could still decide that it is really the _last_ night and consider the relationship over, if he doesn't start acting more like an adult and less like a spoiled child.
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