Raven1018 Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 (edited) There is a guy who was in my summer class and I'd like to request him on Facebook. Where it gets a bit tricky is we do no have any mutual friends despite going to the same school, and I have NOT seen him since the summer. In fact, I think he may have graduated. Also, we never had in depth conversation in class so I would have a lot of explaining to do for how I know his last name. He of course to be polite may not ask me how I know his last name, but Im sure he'll be wondering and find it a bit odd. Basically I have three things working against me: The fact that I was able to find him despite not sharing any mutual friends, him not giving me his last name, and it being 4 months since we last saw each other. Im sure he will be wondering how this girl he has not seen in months and barely spoke to in class was able to find him without sharing any mutual friends. Basically he will put two and two together and know that I purposely sought him out and put effort into locating him, and that he has been on my mind even though our class ended 4 months ago. People keep telling me to go for it, but if you put yourself in that situation wouldnt you feel creeped out? I have to admit, even I would feel creeped out if a guy did that to me. He is very attractive, tall and muscular. So as sad as it is to say, he wont be as easily flattered as other guys that a girl approached him. I know most of you will say guys love that stuff but hot guys have different standards and are probably used to that sort of thing. Instead of finding it flattering they might find it creepy. I dont find myself unattractive. I receive a lot of attention from men and find myself moderately attractive. But still, I am not conceited enough to believe that Im so hot he is going to overlook all the creepy things about this situation and be thanking his lucky stars I got in contact with him. I did catch him staring at me in class a few times. Times that I would turn around and he would just be staring at me, but I guess I was a little shy and just looked away quickly whenever he made eye contact. And you know what that doesnt even matter because who knows if that was just coincidence. Anyway, the point im trying to make is there are many creepy elements to this and I dont want a random friend request to make him think im stalker-sh. Im not. I just have a knack for remembering hot guys in boring summer classes =p so I need a GOOD pick up line. Something smooth to take away from all the creepy things I mentioned before like not having any mutual friends, and knowing his last name. C'mon guys I need this to be smooth and coy....help me out!!!! lol I need something GOOD to say. BTW he is 24 and I am 22. So nothing stupid. People are age require a certain degree of tact and social etiquette that people in their teens do not. When you are a teenager all you have to say is something like "hey Ive seen you in class before you're cute". That will NOT work in this situation lol. Thank you in advance!! Edited December 22, 2013 by Raven1018
StanMusial Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 It's creepy. He will probably tell his gf/fiance about the weird girl that hit him up on facebook and she will be pissed.
Onethirtyeight Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 My thinking is this: He'll be creeped out by it no matter what, the question is if he cares. I wouldn't care and I'm not bad looking and I have girls approch me, I'd probably just decide if I'm interested or not and either friend you or just ignore you. As far as saying something goes you could go be a stalker and join a group he's in. Then wait a day or two and then tell him you found him through that group. I haven't done that with girls or any thing, no never
ThatMan Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 I think this message might be a winner! "Hey there big guy. You don't know me but I've been leering at you from afar. We've spent a very brief amount of time together in the same room and I've thought of you since. I have finally discovered your facebook. Marry me now."
antonio1149 Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 There is a guy who was in my summer class and I'd like to request him on Facebook. Where it gets a bit tricky is we do no have any mutual friends despite going to the same school, and I have NOT seen him since the summer. In fact, I think he may have graduated. Also, we never had in depth conversation in class so I would have a lot of explaining to do for how I know his last name. He of course to be polite may not ask me how I know his last name, but Im sure he'll be wondering and find it a bit odd. Basically I have three things working against me: The fact that I was able to find him despite not sharing any mutual friends, him not giving me his last name, and it being 4 months since we last saw each other. Im sure he will be wondering how this girl he has not seen in months and barely spoke to in class was able to find him without sharing any mutual friends. Basically he will put two and two together and know that I purposely sought him out and put effort into locating him, and that he has been on my mind even though our class ended 4 months ago. People keep telling me to go for it, but if you put yourself in that situation wouldnt you feel creeped out? I have to admit, even I would feel creeped out if a guy did that to me. He is very attractive, tall and muscular. So as sad as it is to say, he wont be as easily flattered as other guys that a girl approached him. I know most of you will say guys love that stuff but hot guys have different standards and are probably used to that sort of thing. Instead of finding it flattering they might find it creepy. I dont find myself unattractive. I receive a lot of attention from men and find myself moderately attractive. But still, I am not conceited enough to believe that Im so hot he is going to overlook all the creepy things about this situation and be thanking his lucky stars I got in contact with him. I did catch him staring at me in class a few times. Times that I would turn around and he would just be staring at me, but I guess I was a little shy and just looked away quickly whenever he made eye contact. And you know what that doesnt even matter because who knows if that was just coincidence. Anyway, the point im trying to make is there are many creepy elements to this and I dont want a random friend request to make him think im stalker-sh. Im not. I just have a knack for remembering hot guys in boring summer classes =p so I need a GOOD pick up line. Something smooth to take away from all the creepy things I mentioned before like not having any mutual friends, and knowing his last name. C'mon guys I need this to be smooth and coy....help me out!!!! lol I need something GOOD to say. BTW he is 24 and I am 22. So nothing stupid. People are age require a certain degree of tact and social etiquette that people in their teens do not. When you are a teenager all you have to say is something like "hey Ive seen you in class before you're cute". That will NOT work in this situation lol. Thank you in advance!! Forget about all that creepy/not-creepy stuff and just go for it. If he finds you appealing, he'll be happy. If he's not interested for whatever reason, he won't be. You really have nothing to lose. Your bigger concern should be whether he'll be serious or not. If he's single/horny, he may show interest, but since he's "very attractive" and you're only "moderately attractive," he may just date you casually while he keeps an eye out for someone who's more in his league.
Author Raven1018 Posted December 23, 2013 Author Posted December 23, 2013 (edited) I did not say he was very attractive and me only moderately attractive as a comparison between him and I. I do get hit on a lot but I was trying to be modest and I cant see myself through the eyes of others so thats why I said I consider myself at least moderately attractive. Whether others would consider me moderately attractive or very attractive, I dont know. To each their own. Same with him, I consider him very attractive. He is very much my type, but not everyone might consider him "very" attractive. I was by no means using those terms to compare the two of us or to say that I think he is more attractive than me. And I have to say I am a little disheartened by some of these comments. Everyone I spoke to says to go for it, but I come on here and most people seem to be agreeing that its "creepy". But I did come here for honesty after all, so Im not mad at it. I am just surprised at the huge differences in opinions there seems to be. My friends that I told to about this (even guys) say to go for it because Facebook makes this type of thing normal nowadays. Regardless, I do appreciate all your honesty though and difference in opinion. As an update, I just wanted to let you all know that I did take the leap and request him. Waiting for him now to accept me. He should recognize me from class, so Im sure he will accept me but **fingers crossed** he messages me first so that I dont have to have been the one to request him first AND message him first. Im not quite sure what I would say if he does not message first. I would kind of feel he does not have much interest in speaking to me if he does not message first =/ Edited December 23, 2013 by Raven1018
Author Raven1018 Posted December 23, 2013 Author Posted December 23, 2013 Also I wanted to add that dating him is the last thing on my radar. I am just interested in getting to know the hot guy in my summer class. There was just something about him that said losing contact with him forever was not an option. Maybe its because he is an out of state student like me and he is actually from a state I lived in for a long time. He was also a transfer student, like me, and bi-racial like me. On top of me being very attracted to him I was very pulled to him by all these similarities. Im a doofus for not talking to him more in class though, and I know that. But hopefully I'll get a chance to talk to him now. Its all easy peezy at the moment just looking to befriend him, dating is not on my mind Of course I would not mind if we meshed really well....but I hardly know him. Im not there yet. I am reaching out because our similarities intrigue me and I kick myself in the ass for not talking to him in class.
MidwestUSA Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 Well here's a story for you, OP. I befriended a guy I didn't really know, simply because of the number of mutual friends, and because we ended up commenting on a lot of the same things (music related). One day I put up a general post about having two concert tickets I needed to part with. He was interested. Long story short, he moved in with me just days before the actual concert date, and we were married six months after that. Sometimes, good things happen! 2
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