vanellope Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 these months happened many things. today I got a mail from him, I know I should not read but I still read it. he said, he want me and his wife can be friends, he said I should know who hurt the most by this is the wife. and he also said he already delete the things from the wife side, I should not worry that. he said the wife know I am his girlfriend for several months already, she might accept it if I don't force him divorce. I know his wife never would accept it, otherwise won't threat me when she found video weeks ago, she accept is because she is house wife, and she don't have choice.
whatatangledweb Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 Your MM is out of his mind. His wife will not be friends with you. You read what she wrote you. You know she was thinking of sending that video to people. Your MM is telling you everything he can think of to get back into the affair with you. He is not going to divorce his wife. Housewives get divorced everyday. Everyone has choices. You really need to stay away from him for your sake. 5
Cinnimon Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 Vanellope. I so hope you are not even considering this. It will twist you up so bad and I fear eventually destroy you. And I'm really sorry to say this to you as I know your confused and hurting BUT WHAT A PIG!! If I were you I would tell him...well I won't say it on here but PLEASE get away from this man, this A, for your own good PLEASE. 2
Cinnimon Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 Your MM is out of his mind. His wife will not be friends with you. You read what she wrote you. You know she was thinking of sending that video to people. Your MM is telling you everything he can think of to get back into the affair with you. He is not going to divorce his wife. Housewives get divorced everyday. Everyone has choices. You really need to stay away from him for your sake. Yes, yes, yes, yes !!!!! 1
Popsicle Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 I say give him waht he wants and try to be her friend and be "open" about everything like he fantasizes and let him watch the whole thing and his life crumble to pieces.
Ruffian1 Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 , she might accept it if I don't force him divorce He wants more cake. Don't give him anymore. He is a liar. 1
whatatangledweb Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 Vanellope, Do you think he is doing all this to get you to help him with a new business? Were you suppose to put money into opening it?
Author vanellope Posted December 22, 2013 Author Posted December 22, 2013 I feel my affair is really a bit abnormal, I don't understand why he even think about her and I can be friends after everything happened. he write this to me in fact is meaning, hey, I am not going to divorce or marry you, I offer you to be my secret lover, you can enjoy the time with me when I want to, but please try to be my wife friend and dont let her find out, otherwise you will hurt her, and at that time I cannot protect you if she threat you, I will stand on her side to protect my family. I am not going to contact him, yes for my own sake. I share my story here because I try to find out if there is any situation like mine, I am really confused. 3
Author vanellope Posted December 22, 2013 Author Posted December 22, 2013 Vanellope, Do you think he is doing all this to get you to help him with a new business? Were you suppose to put money into opening it? I do think about it too, is it make sence of everything? before we plan to open it together, I think now he still want to, and both of us will put money into.
happy stillmore Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 It is all about him. Please don't give in to him. He is delusional to think you would be willing to share him with his wife. That is crazy talk! He must think he is great enough for two women. Unattractive pig. 2
Popsicle Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 It is all about him. Please don't give in to him. He is delusional to think you would be willing to share him with his wife. That is crazy talk! He must think he is great enough for two women. Unattractive pig. Yes They think this way because they feel like the OW signed up for this. She knew he was married from the start. 2
whatatangledweb Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 I do think about it too, is it make sence of everything? before we plan to open it together, I think now he still want to, and both of us will put money into. Unfortunately it seems he wants to use you to open this business. You seem like a very sweet and innocent woman. Please don't fall for it. He is willing to tell you anything to get what he wants. You want a family and he is not the one for that.
Snipercatt Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 Vanellope, what you describe is not unusual. It is just more of the same selfish talk of your xMM. Block his communication with you so you can move on. 2
dreamingoftigers Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 Send the communication to his wife and tell her that you want him to stop harassing you. You don't want to be his "secret lover" or open a business with him or "be her friend." You only want her and him to leave you alone. You don't want to be involved with someone married ever again because you see how messed up and painful it can be. Lesson learned. I feel my affair is really a bit abnormal, I don't understand why he even think about her and I can be friends after everything happened. he write this to me in fact is meaning, hey, I am not going to divorce or marry you, I offer you to be my secret lover, you can enjoy the time with me when I want to, but please try to be my wife friend and dont let her find out, otherwise you will hurt her, and at that time I cannot protect you if she threat you, I will stand on her side to protect my family. I am not going to contact him, yes for my own sake. I share my story here because I try to find out if there is any situation like mine, I am really confused. 1
Author vanellope Posted December 22, 2013 Author Posted December 22, 2013 be honest, he did attract me very much and he make me feel he love me very much so that's why I love him and trust him from heart even I knew he is married, I did think it's he and me belong together instead his wife. I only have two relationship before this affair, both are long term and from the school classmates, very simple and peace life. when I met him I do really believe that he love me and will marry me one day and so on, I was kind of innocent and I believe others easily. this affair really consume me too much, beside the tears and broken heart also the simple life that I cannot get back. I miss the innocent and happier me, really. 2
Popsicle Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 You can get back your simple life. Just forget it ever happened. Don't let him have that much control over you and your life. You will be loved again. He's not the only guy on this earth.
Snipercatt Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 I understand your feelings. Perhaps his W feels as you do - that her innocence and trust are gone. Both of you are being used for xMM's selfish purposes. You should block all communication with them. Be judicious in your future relationships. Be wary of people who come on too strong, too quick. You can have a lovely simple life without being gullible. Time will help you heal. Until then, set your life up to do the things you enjoy and that will help distract you from this pain. 1
Iguanna Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 I have the suspicion that this e-mail is sent by his wife. I can't believe there is a man who would do such a suggestion after all this video threat his wife did. Maybe his wife tries to get a divorce with him and she wants to have evidence for the court in case you accept his "offer"? 2
Snipercatt Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 Iguanna, I suspect that the email may be from the W, as well. I don't trust that the video has been destroyed, either. 2
Author vanellope Posted December 23, 2013 Author Posted December 23, 2013 I think the mail was written by him, i can feel it's his talking, and I am also sure the wife will not divorce with him especially after she saw the fact that I did want him very much. (she is older and no work, family is her everything) but I also don't believe he did delete the things at the wife's site. 1
Snipercatt Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 I am also sure the wife will not divorce with him What's important from your perspective is that xMM doesn't want a divorce. As much as that hurts your heart, you must move on and build a rich life for yourself.
Eggplant Posted December 23, 2013 Posted December 23, 2013 she might accept it if I don't force him divorce.He wants a polygamous relationship. He wants two women. He's just playing chess, figuring out how to line it up. He doesn't actually care about the feeling of anybody involved except himself. The wife will not accept it.
Christ is Love Posted December 24, 2013 Posted December 24, 2013 Do not respond to him. It is a vicious cycle and he will not end it because he likes the benefits he gets from you. Please move on with your life. He is very selfish to think that he can have you and her . I know from experience. My ex mm offered to still have sex with me and buy me gifts but wasn't leaving his wife. We deserve better. We are strong and will get through this! Be Strong and keep it moving in the right direction!! 1
Author vanellope Posted December 24, 2013 Author Posted December 24, 2013 thank you Eggplant and Christ, i will not reply him anymore as now i see clear what he actually want. this is not ture love or love as i thought. he just want me there be with him when he feel boring at life, and I waste too much time in waiting him. 2
Christ is Love Posted December 24, 2013 Posted December 24, 2013 Good choice! Stick to it and take care of yourself. Good luck
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