Butterflying Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 My friend Tammy & I have known each other for over 10 years. Every once in a while we lose touch. It has never seemed strange. We both live busy lives. She is married with kids. But for all the important stuff like weddings, career change celebrations, we connet. Earlier this year I changed jobs. That gave me more free time to hang out with her at social events. She was excited to introduce me to "her" friends. No mayyer what event we attended, everyone I met liked me. So I added these people on Facebook. A few of them exchanged numbers with me. And I have met them for lunch. And one friend agreed to do a project with my company. It was a huge success. Things were going well, or so it seemed. Then I noticed Tammy stopped returning my calls. She doesn't interact with me or any of "her" friends who befriended me on Facebook anymore. One of these people suspects Tammy is angry with them for being friends with me. But I can't understand how that could be true. Why would Tammy introduce me to people if she didn't want them to be friends with me? Is this my fault? Did I break some kind of friendship code? Am I only supposed to go through Tammy in order to communicate with her friends? We are all adults in or 30s to 50s. How will I ever meet new people if I'm not allowed to establish my own relationship with people I'm intoduced to? Mind you, my communication with Tammy never changed. She was invited to lunches with me & "her" friends. But she always turned them down saying she was busy.
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 The problem is on her end, not yours. Natural that you would meet her friends, make friends with them. You did nothing wrong - certainly. You still showed her friendship, and even invited her out. If it is true, and she is jealous of you making friends with her friends, she is not much a friend. Consider: She might be going through something, thus, all this turning you and her friends down. But no, you did nothing wrong. If this really worries you; you and her are adults, and are capable of talking this out(if she gives you the chance). 2
Author Butterflying Posted December 22, 2013 Author Posted December 22, 2013 (edited) I've tried communication. But she won't answer or return my calls. I've posted comments on Facebook in support of her posts. She acknowledges & interacts with everyone except me & the people who befriended me. It appears she has a totally new set of friends now. And that's fine. But if I said or did anything to offend or betray her I would like to know. I'm more concerned in case any other friends introduce me to their friends. Everyone forms these cliques in our town. When someone intriduces you it's like welcoming you into their circle. I don't know the protocol because all of my friends are long distant. I've been trying to meet people in the city where I live. Tammy is a social person who knows everyone! It was her idea to help me make new friends. I don't understand why she is angry with me for actually being friends with the people she introduced me to. What did she expect? Everyone to hate me? Edited December 22, 2013 by Butterflying 1
todreaminblue Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 i absolutely adore it when someone i introduce connects with friends i have made, I actually love it.....the code of friendship is forgiveness and honesty......not jealousy and ignorance .....deb 2
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 22, 2013 Posted December 22, 2013 Sounds to me like Tammy bailed on your friendship...some friend she is! I would cease a pointless communication with her. Does not sound like she will be providing you with any answers. Enjoy the new friends you have now. Watchout for cliques. They come and go. A real friend wouldn't do this, that there is your answer. You can have better. Shame on her! She lost a caring friend. 1
soph12 Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 Does Tammy have trouble making friends? Without knowing any other details, she sounds jealous.
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