Jump to content

sending this email to my ex girl

Jord

By Jord
in Breaks and Breaking Up

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Jord Member

Jord

Posted
Posted (edited)

background: last time me and my ex had a big fight it about her lying to me about leaving me for somebody else. she suckered me into believing her, and saying she didn't. but lately i'm putting 2 and 2 together, it all makes sense and i'm going to send her this. btw, i'm no longer looking to get back with her, i gave up on that...

 

"hi, i know i said i'm never gonna contact you again, but there's something i need to find closure with. i would like you to give me your honesty. you told me you didn't leave me for someone else, but the facts i get tell me different. just tell me the truth, you had someone waiting for you to break up with me. if thats true, i won't be bitter and will only want the best for you. i just want water under the bridge."

Edited by Jord
Haydn Established Member

Haydn

Posted
Posted

Big mistake. You already sound bitter. If you no longer want to get her back then i fail to see the point you are trying to make???? She will think how sad is he. You know it! And if you send it and hear nothing then what? Take care.

background: last time me and my ex had a big fight it about her lying to me about leaving me for somebody else. she suckered me into believing her, and saying she didn't. but lately i'm putting 2 and 2 together, it all makes sense and i'm going to send her this. btw, i'm no longer looking to get back with her, i gave up on that...

 

"hi, i know i said i'm never gonna contact you again, but there's something i need to find closure with. i would like you to give me your honesty. you told me you didn't leave me for someone else, but the facts i get tell me different. just tell me the truth, you had someone waiting for you to break up with me. if thats true, i won't be bitter and will only want the best for you. i just want water under the bridge."

  • Like 4
  • Author
Jord Member

Jord

Posted
  • Author
Posted
Big mistake. You already sound bitter. If you no longer want to get her back then i fail to see the point you are trying to make???? She will think how sad is he. You know it! And if you send it and hear nothing then what? Take care.

 

one of those things where you don't need to know, but you want to know. i want her to just admit it, so i'm not left wondering forever.

ConfusedHumanBeing Established Member

ConfusedHumanBeing

Posted
Posted
background: last time me and my ex had a big fight it about her lying to me about leaving me for somebody else. she suckered me into believing her, and saying she didn't. but lately i'm putting 2 and 2 together, it all makes sense and i'm going to send her this. btw, i'm no longer looking to get back with her, i gave up on that...

 

"hi, i know i said i'm never gonna contact you again, but there's something i need to find closure with. i would like you to give me your honesty. you told me you didn't leave me for someone else, but the facts i get tell me different. just tell me the truth, you had someone waiting for you to break up with me. if thats true, i won't be bitter and will only want the best for you. i just want water under the bridge."

 

Not only is the e-mail an awful idea, the content of it is even worse. You are asking an ex if they wanted to date someone else. Really? She doesn't owe you that answer nor is it really any of your business at the moment. What good is that going to do? I can promise you she will get mad for you asking or not respond.

 

Incredibly couterproductive. Dont do it.

  • Like 3
Haydn Established Member

Haydn

Posted
Posted

That makes no sense. Like i said if she does not reply?????? You will keep asking? Forever? Look no one owes us anything when they leave us. Took me a long time to figure that out. They are gone. You should be as well. Bad days good days all par for the course. Dont do this friend.

 

 

one of those things where you don't need to know, but you want to know. i want her to just admit it, so i'm not left wondering forever.
Loo
  • Like 1
HeartbrokenNewbie Established Member

HeartbrokenNewbie

Posted
Posted

I doubt she will admit it anyway & that will just make u mad.. Trust what your instincts are telling u x

AlphaC Established Member

AlphaC

Posted
Posted
one of those things where you don't need to know, but you want to know. i want her to just admit it, so i'm not left wondering forever.

 

 

This has to be the worst idea since the guy who invented those electronic cigarettes. But anyway, back to you Mr. Jord, I know what you are thinking, I was young and dumb once too.

 

So here is what Jord is thinking,

 

"I will send her this guilt laced email, she will be so happy to see my email in her "in box" that her heart will race at the sight of such. Her curiosity will peak since all she's thinking about is me and our old/ antiquated relationship and my non proofread grammar. When the ex reads my message about my insinuations and accusations of cheating and/or having another man waiting in the wings, she will come running to my house to prove to me otherwise. At that point I will have her in my arms and we will make up/make love and I will go back to treating her like a side piece."

 

Dude, if she is with another guy that's your closure, no need to send an email to confirm the existence of such. If she broke up with you, and is not contacting you, she is not interested in you anymore. Grow up, be a man, I mean be a boy who will someday be a man. Peace!!

  • Like 4
InnocentMan Established Member

InnocentMan

Posted
Posted

Why expect someone you suspect of being dishonest, to suddenly become a bastion of truth? Literally no good can come from this type of interaction. In fact, she will probably lose any respect that she has left for you.

 

Don't become 'that guy'. Become the guy that doesn't give a **** why she left.

  • Like 5
seekingpeaceinlove Established Member

seekingpeaceinlove

Posted
Posted

Look at it this way: Yes, she left you for someone else (someone else = not you). This person could be in her life now or maybe it'll happen later down the road. Either way, it's not you.

 

She left you because she no longer wanted to be with you. That's all you should focus on. Everything else will just be rubbing salt into your wound.

 

Sending the email shows how incredibly bitter you are. You may not even get the response you want and be left feeling worse than you already do..

  • Like 2
Zoe Lilith Established Member

Zoe Lilith

Posted
Posted

I agree with Haydn, you might not get any answers or replies, she doesn't care anymore. If she doesn't answer, it will make you angry (talking from my own experience)...Since the relationship is "no more", there is no point confronting her about that. It's irelevant! Stick with what you said to her "I will never contact you again"..

  • Like 3
Haydn Established Member

Haydn

Posted
Posted

This i like.

 

 

 

This has to be the worst idea since the guy who invented those electronic cigarettes. But anyway, back to you Mr. Jord, I know what you are thinking, I was young and dumb once too.

 

So here is what Jord is thinking,

 

"I will send her this guilt laced email, she will be so happy to see my email in her "in box" that her heart will race at the sight of such. Her curiosity will peak since all she's thinking about is me and our old/ antiquated relationship and my non proofread grammar. When the ex reads my message about my insinuations and accusations of cheating and/or having another man waiting in the wings, she will come running to my house to prove to me otherwise. At that point I will have her in my arms and we will make up/make love and I will go back to treating her like a side piece."

 

Dude, if she is with another guy that's your closure, no need to send an email to confirm the existence of such. If she broke up with you, and is not contacting you, she is not interested in you anymore. Grow up, be a man, I mean be a boy who will someday be a man. Peace!!

chris21422 Established Member

chris21422

Posted
Posted

1) You don't need to know if there is someone in the background it doesn't matter

 

2) You don't need to send that email you will look very pathetic.

 

3) Be a grown man and just show her that you respect her decision and show her that you can live your life without her. It's hard I know but you need to do it and face it.

  • Like 1
Zoe Lilith Established Member

Zoe Lilith

Posted
Posted
1) You don't need to know if there is someone in the background it doesn't matter

 

2) You don't need to send that email you will look very pathetic.

 

3) Be a grown man and just show her that you respect her decision and show her that you can live your life without her. It's hard I know but you need to do it and face it.

 

....and walk away with dignity!

  • Like 2
Trapito Established Member

Trapito

Posted
Posted

Noooo! Just don't. She can't give you closure, only you can.

ponchsox Established Member

ponchsox

Posted
Posted

She's not going to answer you, and even if she did, it wouldn't be the truth.

KatZee Established Member

KatZee

Posted
Posted

I'm sure the *send* button was already hit, but this is/was a terrible idea and a terrible email.

 

First of all, it doesn't matter if she merely broke up with you or broke up with you for someone else.

 

Instead of putting "2 and 2 together" and getting "facts" from third-party sources, how about you spend the time focusing on yourself and moving on with your life?

 

If I got an email like this from my ex, I would wonder why he was still so obsessed with my life, and why he was pretty much stalking me and what I was doing.

 

It's not your business what she's doing, or who she's with. It's not up to you to get down to the truth to have closure. The only person that's going to give you closure is yourself, not her. The information you're seeking DOES.NOT.MATTER. Not at all.

 

So if you haven't sent it, delete it. Close the computer, and redirect your efforts inward.

  • Like 2
  • Author
Jord Member

Jord

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Is it really that bad if I send this?!? I mean you guys make it seem like a big deal lol

Zoe Lilith Established Member

Zoe Lilith

Posted
Posted
Is it really that bad if I send this?!? I mean you guys make it seem like a big deal lol

 

 

I just don't see the point of contacting her...It's over, it doesn't matter anymore. Fact is, she doesn't care what you think, or how you feel, or what you think or know the facts are, it's irelevat to her!

Of course, it's your decision to make..Good Luck! :)

  • Like 1
ConfusedHumanBeing Established Member

ConfusedHumanBeing

Posted
Posted
Is it really that bad if I send this?!? I mean you guys make it seem like a big deal lol

 

Yes its a huge deal lol. You are pretty much calling her out for something she may or may not have done AND something that really isn't your business anymore. So wtf are you expecting. You'll probably get No answer, her getting mad that you asked that question, or an untruthful answer.

 

Sending that email is REALLY bad idea. We've all made them, but if you haven't done it, THEN DONT DO IT!!!!

  • Like 1
organizedchaos Established Member

organizedchaos

Posted
Posted
Is it really that bad if I send this?!? I mean you guys make it seem like a big deal lol

 

Send it. Go ahead. I triple dog dare you.

Mariposa10 Established Member

Mariposa10

Posted
Posted

Don't do it. She's not worth it. You will only give her an ego boost. Ignore her completely. It doesn't matter anymore, you two are no longer together.

MoooOinkBaaa Established Member

MoooOinkBaaa

Posted
Posted

Is it bad to be stalking someone who you still love and are finding it hard to forget? (Personal question that a reply in this thread made me ask).

 

Don't send the e-mail OP, you don't need her for any favours.

 

Even if you don't care about getting back. Which memory of yourself would you like to leave her, a weak needy one or the person she loved?

  • Like 2
KatZee Established Member

KatZee

Posted
Posted
Is it really that bad if I send this?!? I mean you guys make it seem like a big deal lol

 

It is a big deal, because honestly, real talk right now, you're the ex. What she's doing is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. None. Not even a little bit.

 

You lost all right to inquire about her life, who she's dating, what she did, the day she dumped you.

 

I get that you feel some sort of "need" for closure, but her dumping you is the closure. Door closed. Over.

 

Also, someone already said it, if you send that email you will NOT get the truth. She will lie right to your face. Either because she doesn't have the balls to be that mean to you, or she doesn't want to deal with any of your crap you may say after the fact.

 

So be done with it, delete the email, move on.

  • Like 3
BlessYourCottonSocks Established Member

BlessYourCottonSocks

Posted
Posted
It is a big deal, because honestly, real talk right now, you're the ex. What she's doing is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. None. Not even a little bit.

 

You lost all right to inquire about her life, who she's dating, what she did, the day she dumped you.

 

I get that you feel some sort of "need" for closure, but her dumping you is the closure. Door closed. Over.

 

Also, someone already said it, if you send that email you will NOT get the truth. She will lie right to your face. Either because she doesn't have the balls to be that mean to you, or she doesn't want to deal with any of your crap you may say after the fact.

 

So be done with it, delete the email, move on.

 

sounds like you have been there done that!!!

 

haha this is exactly why I stay NC to avoid making myself look like a fool, desperate or crazy.

 

My ex doesn't deserve to know what I'm doing, which is why I ignore him and I don't deserve to know what he is doing which is why I don't even think about it or text him. We are strangers now. It's better that way.

 

It's over. It's just something we all have to accept!!

 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...