natwilliams Posted December 21, 2013 Posted December 21, 2013 I've been working really hard since moving to my new city to make new friends by doing a variety of things. I'm super positive and invite people over to my house or out to events. I think I'm pretty good about not overdoing it or being awkward or annoying about it. I'm a lot better than I used to be about spending out to and not being cheap. So what gives? The weekend roles around and no one is really inviting me out to anything. Is it that I don't smile enough? I've heard this before and work on it but I can't be fake. Just trying to build some good community and have mutual effort on making fun things happen.
nescafe1982 Posted December 21, 2013 Posted December 21, 2013 How long have you been in the new city? And how frequently do you invite people out to stuff you're doing (or have them over to your place)? Is it usually the same group of people you're inviting over? I'm wondering if you have developed a core group of people you spend time with yet (this takes time, sometimes a lot of time, after a big move). If you have a core group of friends who you see regularly, and who will come to you when you invite them someplace... then maybe the thing to do is to ask them "so what's up this weekend? anything cool going on?" Alternatively, if you're close to one or two people, you could tell them that you'd like to get out more, meet more people, that you would love their help if they can give it (since you're new to the city and all). In general, though... be patient with yourself if you've moved somewhere recently. It takes a while to rebuild a social network. I've moved across country about 3 months ago and have barely met anyone yet... so I can relate to your feelings on this. But meeting quality people who you click with can take a while.
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