Need some brutal honesty, possibly words of how to get through...

[what_a_blonde]

Sorry in advance for the long post, but I'm in need of some brutal honesty... Words of encouragement ... Anything on how to be myself again.

 

He reeled me in... I slept with him 5 times (over the course of 4 months). We were good friends for almost 2 years prior to the intimacy, so I trusted him and never thought he was only after one thing.

 

I'm having a fairly tough time getting over the realization that I fell for the bait and am only viewed as a booty call to him. Makes me feel sooo crappy.

 

I can't seem to forgive myself for this, for letting myself get involved with him like that and not being able to see he only wanted one thing.

 

He didn't tell me until 2x that he only wanted this to be two friends having fun.. And while I thought I was ok with that- hence proceeding 3x more- I realized he no longer treated me with respect and the way he used to when we were really "just friends". And it hurt too much after every time we were intimate, knowing I wouldn't hear from him for another week or two.

 

It's been almost 2 months since our last time. I deleted him from my life but he still occasionally texts me telling me he is sorry, sorry for being a douche, he misses talking to me, etc.

 

This weekend I gave in and actually text him back... We talked a little bit, but it became clear real quick all he was hoping for was a booty call.

 

I know I'm worth so much more than that, but him and this whole situation has me so down in the dumps and feeling so crappy about myself.

 

I'm tired of him thinking he can only text me and get that from me. I wish there were a way to get even with him and have him feel the crappiness that I have dealt with... But then again I don't even know that I wish that upon him.

 

Any words of wisdom out there... Thanks in advance

[GoreSP]

I was in a similar situation this summer.

 

First of all, you need to start thinking about this situation like two friends having a good time together. My point is as long as you beat yourself up over this, you will keep feeling like crap about.

 

It's ok to have sex with someone you are not romantically involved with - yes yes! Even if you are a woman!

 

So now, if you truly want this man out of your life, you need to clearly tell him that and tell him to leave you alone.

Men like this don't really get the message until it's clear as water. He will hang on to the simplest sign of hesitation on your part.

You also need to stand your ground.

[Why so consistent]

Seem like you know what he want from you and I'm sure u know how you feel about this , why would u keep falling into it ? Blocked it completely because all he want is one thing .

[legion113]

If you want to get even tell him you'll be right over..then leaving him hanging...literally.

[what_a_blonde]

I was in a similar situation this summer.

 

First of all, you need to start thinking about this situation like two friends having a good time together. My point is as long as you beat yourself up over this, you will keep feeling like crap about.

 

It's ok to have sex with someone you are not romantically involved with - yes yes! Even if you are a woman!

 

So now, if you truly want this man out of your life, you need to clearly tell him that and tell him to leave you alone.

Men like this don't really get the message until it's clear as water. He will hang on to the simplest sign of hesitation on your part.

You also need to stand your ground.

 

Thanks for your response. I just don't know I can tell myself it was two friends having fun when I never felt that way and I truly deep down cared about him... And hoped he would show in some way he cared too. It was fun at the moment... I won't lie our last time was sooo awesome... But the torture I dealt with after was no fun at all. Just knowing he won't text me to tell me have a good day, or just see how I'm doing. None of that until he was ready to sleep with me again. Which was usually about 2 weeks later.:/ if I'd try to text, he'd be distant so I just left it up to him to contact me.

 

I just feel like I'm viewed as some easy girl now...feel kind of embarrassed.

 

Next time he texts me and it's late I think I will respond to make it clear as water as U mention. I just wish it were that simple and easy in getting my confidence back.

[barky2]

The only way to get some respect back in his eyes, is to completely move on.

 

Really think about that for a few.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Barky

[loversquarrel]

Really??? You were friends with him for two years and he treats you this way??? Don't let his actions/behavior bring you down - he's the one who is less of a person, not you. What a loser....to seriously pretend to be your friend for 2 yrs. only to use you... **** him, you don't need his respect, he certainly isn't worthy of yours.

 

Just tell him you're pregnant then watch him throw up on his shoe's!!!

[what_a_blonde]

The only way to get some respect back in his eyes, is to completely move on.

 

Really think about that for a few.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Barky

 

That's so true. I just hate how he keeps coming back even after I've told him I don't think we belong in each others lives.. At all.

 

But I'm guessing he's going to keep trying just to see if I'm serious, which is where the respect will eventually come in. Thanks.

[what_a_blonde]

Really??? You were friends with him for two years and he treats you this way??? Don't let his actions/behavior bring you down - he's the one who is less of a person, not you. What a loser....to seriously pretend to be your friend for 2 yrs. only to use you... **** him, you don't need his respect, he certainly isn't worthy of yours.

 

Just tell him you're pregnant then watch him throw up on his shoe's!!!

 

Thanks this makes me feel a lot better. I just dont understand myself why I'm still so worried about how he views me when really, he's the one who disrespected me (even though he will pin this ALL on me.. Saying "sorry if I hurt you but I told you from the beginning this was supposed to be two friends having fun").

 

Lol about the pregnancy thing!!! While that's a terrible joke... And I know I'm not... He needs a scare like that to slap him into reality about sleeping around with random women.