rec88 Posted December 20, 2013 Posted December 20, 2013 Today is my first really tough day in a while. It's coming up on one year since she left, and I've done everything by the book regarding my own healing. It's been tough, but I'm genuinely happy with my life, more so than I could have expected after being kicked out of a relationship that I didn't want to end. But today, I'm thinking a lot about the past. I think the holiday season is a trigger. I can't stop thinking about what a huge piece of my life that relationship was. It was many of the easiest and most difficult times of my life. And we always made it through and grew from our mistakes. Having someone to trust to pick you up no matter what, and vice versa, it was one of the most rewarding things I've experienced. It was a constant reminder that hard work pays off. That it's better to give than to receive. I know I'll find it again in the future, but today I'm remembering just how close I was... I guess this shows that healing is by no means a linear process. We go back and forth depending on the day or week. The number of bad days has definitely dwindled, but obviously aren't completely gone... Oh well, tomorrow will be better. Thanks for reading guys and girls. 1
L1ght Posted December 20, 2013 Posted December 20, 2013 Today is my first really tough day in a while. It's coming up on one year since she left, and I've done everything by the book regarding my own healing. It's been tough, but I'm genuinely happy with my life, more so than I could have expected after being kicked out of a relationship that I didn't want to end. But today, I'm thinking a lot about the past. I think the holiday season is a trigger. I can't stop thinking about what a huge piece of my life that relationship was. It was many of the easiest and most difficult times of my life. And we always made it through and grew from our mistakes. Having someone to trust to pick you up no matter what, and vice versa, it was one of the most rewarding things I've experienced. It was a constant reminder that hard work pays off. That it's better to give than to receive. I know I'll find it again in the future, but today I'm remembering just how close I was... I guess this shows that healing is by no means a linear process. We go back and forth depending on the day or week. The number of bad days has definitely dwindled, but obviously aren't completely gone... Oh well, tomorrow will be better. Thanks for reading guys and girls. Over time it becomes more about "not having someone" than "not having a specific person i.e. our ex's".......so don't let it get you down. We all feel lonely from time to time but that's just part of life and reflection of the things that used to be. Sounds to me like you have already done most of the hard work moving forwards in this past year so use the strength and knowledge you have gained to focus your energies on an even fresher start in the new year....that's certainly what I intend to do. Good luck. 1
Reels Posted December 20, 2013 Posted December 20, 2013 Oh well, exactly what i think too.. I really miss those days with my first and only love. I think if i could had talked her some more. My heart is really heavy since she has left. I have to live with the delusion that she will be back one day, but possibly it won't ever happen, so i keep reading whatever i can, and do whatever i am told. Just to keep myself busy and worthwhile.
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