LostOne08 Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 I'm furious and I have absolutely no right to be. My ex and I broke up 4 months ago, but remained friends on Facebook. She told me that she wanted to keep being friends but made no effort to do so. Which is fine. Today, I discovered that she unfriended me or blocked me on Facebook. This infuriates me. I had made no attempts to contact her in over 2 months and had planned on not contacting her ever again. I should have unfriended her long ago, I know that. But, this is like another wave of rejection from her and I'm taking it exrtemely hard. Most of me is screaming that she doesn't have the right to do this. That right should have been with me. After 4 months, especially. It's apparent I wasn't interfering in her life. I feel like I'm back at square one and it's devastating because of some other issues that were yoking on in my life. Now I know there's no chance for us ever again. I'm just venting right now, I suppose. The only thing I can do is post here, because otherwise I'm going to end up texting, calling or messaging her and lashing out at her. I don't want to do that, but it's really hard not to right now.
FortunateSon Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 She might be getting involved with someone else and doesn't want you to see or know about it. This might be a blessing in disguise, and will save you some pain in the future. You acknowledged that you never planned to contact her again, so it really shouldn't matter anyway. Despite the hurt you feel by this, do not contact or message her about this, nothing good will come from it. Keep working on yourself, healing, and moving forward! 2
reddragon588 Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 Great news. Delete or block her on any other channels as well. Ideally you would have been the one to delete her but it achieves the same end. 1
ponchsox Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 You should have unfriended her and blocked her first. 3
BlessYourCottonSocks Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 (edited) I'm furious and I have absolutely no right to be. My ex and I broke up 4 months ago, but remained friends on Facebook. She told me that she wanted to keep being friends but made no effort to do so. Which is fine. Today, I discovered that she unfriended me or blocked me on Facebook. This infuriates me. I had made no attempts to contact her in over 2 months and had planned on not contacting her ever again. I should have unfriended her long ago, I know that. But, this is like another wave of rejection from her and I'm taking it exrtemely hard. Most of me is screaming that she doesn't have the right to do this. That right should have been with me. After 4 months, especially. It's apparent I wasn't interfering in her life. I feel like I'm back at square one and it's devastating because of some other issues that were yoking on in my life. Now I know there's no chance for us ever again. I'm just venting right now, I suppose. The only thing I can do is post here, because otherwise I'm going to end up texting, calling or messaging her and lashing out at her. I don't want to do that, but it's really hard not to right now. OMG same thing just happened to me, I just made a thread about it. Except it was Gmail Chat, not Facebook. He doesn't have FB, thank god! But I know exactly how you feel! It sucks because we did nothing to provoke their decision!! They just randomly made their own decision to delete us. It hurts! I wanted to lash out at my ex too, but came here instead. Let it pass. Cry if you need to, do anything besides letting them know they got to us. Don't give them that power!! It sucks, but people have their own reasoning for why they do things. Reasons we will never know. You will get more of a reaction by staying no contact than you will by lashing out to her. Be the strong one. Edited December 19, 2013 by BlessYourCottonSocks
Why so consistent Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 Well..... That's rude since she's said wanna be friend but just do that to you maybe there is a lot of reason behind it but is after 4 months now I hope u are ok. And u should be
Author LostOne08 Posted December 19, 2013 Author Posted December 19, 2013 I know I should have unfriended or blocked her first, but I couldn't do it. I figured since we both are adults and I made it clear I wasn't all over her Facebook (no posts, messages or even liked statuses since before we broke up) that she didn't have to worry about me bothering her in that forum. I don't look at breakups as "games" that are won or lost, but this is a slap in the face. I feel like I should have been the one to make the final break. Oh well. It's water under the bridge now, I suppose. If she is seeing someone new, I don't have to know about it as was previously mentioned. I get to unfriend her friends now, so that's a plus. All this just compounds to the hurt and anger and frustration that I thought I was getting over, though. I'm struggling with a very complex situation where I have feelings for someone else and this unfriending has left me feeling even worse. It's like she waited four months for the perfect time to hurt me the most and drove the nail in the coffin. Even though she has no idea what's going on in my life. I don't even know why she's still thinking enough about me after four months to do that. 1
Why so consistent Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 Well my ex just deactivated her Facebook while we in relationship and reactive after we broke up that I find out 2 weeks ago and that make me feel sad because she active it for other ppl , but she insisted said because of work .
Why so consistent Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 I don't see the problem. It's her FB and she has every right to do what she likes with it. If you had no plans of contacting her again, i don't see why she needed to be on it in the first place. Think of it as a blessing. Now you can properly move forward. Couldn't agree more
KS11 Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 hey man, Like I said in the other post, it sucks sure, but as others has said..in the long run this is a good thing. Just out of curiosity, why would you want to keep her on Facebook? Because for me, I knew that there's no way I want to see how great she's doing. As it was every time I saw her name pop up in my newsfeed I got that feeling in my stomach. And then heaven forbid the day comes where pictures etc start popping up with her new interest. There's no way I could handle seeing that, even just thinking about it now makes me feel sick. Also, the other thing is, I don't want her being able to see anything about my life either, she has no right anymore. They opted out, that means she has no business looking and likewise, nor do I. I'm not having a go, I'm just curious to ask why you would want to keep her on there? I just knew there was no way I could handle it myself. 1
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 I blocked my ex but that was to stop myself from looking and getting hurt further... could be the same thing x 1
Author LostOne08 Posted December 19, 2013 Author Posted December 19, 2013 I know that she has every right to do as she pleases. Like I said initially, I realize that I have no justification for being upset over this. It doesn't make it hurt any less. Like I said, it's a whole new wave of confirming it's over. I guess I'm mostly upset because I should have pulled the trigger first and I didn't. But hey, what does being the first to unfriend her really gain me in the long run? I know everyone is saying I should have done it first, but think about it. For everyone else who was dumped, but unfriended your ex first for that make you feel any better? We were still dumped, they still don't want anything to do with us. Sure, it would've felt good to have the satisfaction of being like, "See? I don't need you either." but the pain still would have been there. KS11, to answer your question, I don't know why I stayed friends with her that long. There's no specific reason, but rather a number of them. She initially said she wanted to be friends, so I thought it would be mature on my part to keep her on Facebook. Like I said, we are both adults and it was an amicable breakup, so I thought we could keep it civil. That was my good reason. I would be lying if I said I didn't look to see what she was up to from time to time. This is for the best, though.
Volthi10 Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 I can understand where you come from. My ex and I would do this back and forth. We actually got into a fight once about 7 months ago and he deleted me. After that everything went down hill between us and now that we are officially broken off it is I who blocked him but because it hurts me to see him thru our mutual friends and I know for a fact that he would check on my page once in a while. Ir ather avoid all the drama. I miss him but its a two way street for both to heal and move on. Ill always love him but I cant torture myself any longer. Don't be mad, let it go, its been months and focus on your progress. If you say anything to her itll let her know you still care and are concerned about it. It opens a whole new can of worms.
Juha Posted December 20, 2013 Posted December 20, 2013 My ex of 2.5 months just unfriended me on fb. She dumped me, I went NC and have been NC. I never looked at her page and really could care less. Just went about living my life. Well she sends me a text a couple of weeks ago telling me how angry she is at me and she is sick of seeing me, my family, and that blonde beetch and how mad she is and it's getting worse and does not know what to do about it and she wants me to make it better. Whatever that means. tells me she never goes on my page and is being forced to see what's going on in my life and she did not want to be that beetch who unfriended me but does not know what else to do. Tells me she is sorry for yelling at me. Does not want me to be mad at her for unfriending me. Does not want to hate me and does not want to lose me. SO she unfriended me after telling me all that. lol She dumped me in a really awful way, never talked with me, just ran away. So she is mad at me and is sick of seeing my life. Told her do whatever she feels she needs to do. Her anger at me is not my problem and she has no more say in my life anymore, she gave that right up. She tells me she is not complaining about what is on my fb page but that she feels like I am being forced on her and "her" fb page. lol This chick if f'ed up. Dude don't even waste a minute thinking about her unfriending you. You have better things to do than to be bothered with these f'ed up beetchs
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