Michelle83 Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 Just a random question I'm curious how others feel. If you were out with your s/o (not married) one day and ran into someone and it was someone they had slept with before (dated or just casually), would you want to know? And what about if it was someone they worked with and you were going to a group function and they were going to be there? Would you want to know there had been a past history or just go in not knowing?
aussietigerwolf Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 why? so you can freak out all evening about them cheating or leaving you for this person? even spending the night acting jealous would not be fun. 1
Author Michelle83 Posted December 18, 2013 Author Posted December 18, 2013 Yeah, that's how I pretty much felt. My bf asked me this and I said I'd prefer not to know at all. Just tell me it's a friend or something and he was a little surprised. Just was wondering if that is the common response or if most people would want to know.
Million.to.1 Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 I'd like to know. I feel my relationship is very trusting, open and honest. I wouldn't feel jealous or insecure about meeting any ex of my boyfriends. In fact, i have meet a couple. What would being worried about it achieve? He is with me, not them. If they were so into each other, they would be together, and i wouldn't be there, obviously. People have pasts. It's the future i'm interested in. 1
crederer Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 I found out stuff like that cause she offered it voluntarily. I didn't need to know. 1
justwhoiam Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 If you were out with your s/o (not married) one day and ran into someone and it was someone they had slept with before (dated or just casually), would you want to know? Yes, I would. And what about if it was someone they worked with and you were going to a group function and they were going to be there? Would you want to know there had been a past history or just go in not knowing? Again, I'd want to know. 1
BikerAccnt Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 No, why do I care who they were with in the past? They are with me now. 1
Bigcitydreamer Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 I wouldn't want to know. I think it would make me feel more uncomfortable around that person. As they say- ignorance is bliss! 2
unicorn farts Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 I would, because I would feel severely irritated/out of the loop if I didn't know and it somehow came up later. 2
d0nnivain Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 When I bumped into somebody from my past, I would always introduce them to my new beau as an EX. To do otherwise seems like I'm hiding my past or somehow ashamed of who I was. A couple of times my husband has pulled me aside & made cracks like you date him? I usually said something like I was young & stupid & he had more hair 20 years ago. 3
ASG Posted December 18, 2013 Posted December 18, 2013 I wouldn't want to know, but knowing also wouldn't throw me. I'm not the jealous type and realise we all have a past (mine is very colourful, so I don't judge). But I just would have no interest in knowing. 2
Author Michelle83 Posted December 19, 2013 Author Posted December 19, 2013 I wouldn't want to know. I think it would make me feel more uncomfortable around that person. As they say- ignorance is bliss! Thanks for all the replies. Yeah, this is kind of my sentiments. I would probably be fine either way, but I think it'd be easier/more comfortable not knowing.
regine_phalange Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 IF (That someone was passing by and didnt see us) THEN I wouldn't want to know anything ELSE IF (she greets him) IF (She was a casual thing) THEN I wouldn't want to know anything ELSE I'd like to know 1
Shepp Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 hahah I really wouldn't - she had a pretty high turnover, id find myself forever running into guys she'd slept with Because we were friends since school, I know some guys she was with casually anyway...it doesn't bother me because A)She's there loss and B) I'm a cocky git and I know i'm better looking But no, generally I have no desire to have past flings pointed out to me - how are you meant to respond "oh, that's nice"
twosadthings Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 Tô be asked to interact socially with someone they had been intimate with would be in my mind disrespectful. If it was a chance meeting and unavoidable then not so unless the greeting was affusive and obvious. Just my opinion. Twosadthings
Untouchable_Fire Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 Yeah, that's how I pretty much felt. My bf asked me this and I said I'd prefer not to know at all. Just tell me it's a friend or something and he was a little surprised. Just was wondering if that is the common response or if most people would want to know. If you are insecure then don't ask don't tell is the best policy. Otherwise it doesn't hurt to know. It just gives you a greater understanding of your spouse which leads to more intimacy. I've been friends with the ex of a GF before and it wasn't a big deal.
GoreSP Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 Just a random question I'm curious how others feel. If you were out with your s/o (not married) one day and ran into someone and it was someone they had slept with before (dated or just casually), would you want to know? And what about if it was someone they worked with and you were going to a group function and they were going to be there? Would you want to know there had been a past history or just go in not knowing? As long as they are not currently sleeping with this person, it's none of my business.
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