How do I get him interested again?

[pinnatarr]

Ok, I'll start at the beginning.

 

Around a year ago, the company I work for started subcontracting to another company. I was put in charge of communications and began dealing with a guy from the other company.

 

After emailing back and forth, we began tweeting each other and discovered we have very similar interests. We're the same age, live in the same city. We'd tweet about nonsense, but it was always a bit awkward, because I felt I didn't know when I could cross the 'work relationship' line, whether he had a girlfriend etc.

 

After a couple of meetings, he tweeted me asking if I fancied going to see a film in the cinema.

 

We had a lovely evening, but it was very unromantic. It had never been said whether it was a date or not, and again it was hard to cross the work line. We left the cinema with a 'well that was great, thanks for a nice night'.

 

We'd been texting every couple of days since then, without it going anywhere, for a month or so, when I plucked up the courage to ask him for a drink. Again, we had a lovely evening, but I felt we didn't cross the work line.

 

A few nights later, I met him at an event we were both attending. After a few drinks and great conversation, it got flirty and we finally kissed. It was a lovely evening, and I could tell that he genuinely enjoyed kissing me. It seemed to have been subtly building for a few months!

 

Since then, I've spoken to him via text, and he said it would be good to catch up. I suggested a time, he said he had a busy week, so I suggested another time, and again, he was busy, but still replying to my texts, continuing conversation with 'how's your day been?' 'what are you up to tonight?' etc.

 

I text the guy back telling him to let me know if he decided he fancied catching up some time, and I haven't heard from him since (other than once through work!).

 

He's a very quiet and quite reserved type of person, and I can't imagine that he's been texting anyone else etc, so I don't think there's another female involved or anything like that. I know he is very very busy with his job.

 

I spoke to my male best friend, who thinks perhaps I got a bit full on asking him to meet for a drink etc, and perhaps he freaked out at the fact we'd kissed, and I was trying to get him to meet with me? Like I was trying to rush him in to something that he wasn't ready for?

 

So, my point is:

 

I'm not saying I'm in love with this guy or anything along those lines, but I'd like to see where things could go with him. A friend of mine told him out right that I liked him on the night we kissed, so I don't need to spell that out for him.

 

I'm not quite sure of the best way to go about communicating with him now. I don't want to text him for fear of being branded 'needy' and devaluing myself, but I do want to communicate with him, and basically convince him that I'm not needy and I don't want to trap him in to having a wife and three kids in the next two years!

 

You know when you meet someone, and you just think 'you're great, you're worth the fight'? That's how I feel.

 

Any suggestions of how to go about this would be great, thanks.

[InnocentMan]

You've made it clear that you are open for something to happen. You asked him out, and he declined for whatever reason. The ball is firmly in his court. I wouldn't go overboard with the texting/contact, especially seeing as you have a working relationship.

 

It shouldn't be this difficult, if he genuinely likes you. Most men would have suggested an alternative date, if they were just busy at the time you asked.

 

I would keep all contact on a strictly friendly/work basis for the time being and see what happens.

[jonny walker]

he might wants you to be patient and wait for the time to cross the line.