When your ex contacts you

[robyncat]

I broke up with my boyfriend of a year a week and a half ago. The day after, I picked up a few of my things from his apartment, and we agreed it was best not to talk for a while. A few days later, he texted me because he found my debit card at his apartment, I told him I already had a replacement card and then we texted back and forth a little bit about how hard it had been for both of us.

 

2 days ago, he messaged me a funny picture on facebook, I replied that it was funny, and then he said "sorry kind of drunk".

 

Last night, he texted me around 1am asking if I wanted to come visit the kitten (we got her together but she belongs to him) and talk a bit some time. I asked what he wanted to talk about and the conversation basically devolved in to him hinting that he was making lots of changes in his life and thinking about things, and that he had something important to tell me "it was nothing that he wanted to text about and it would just make things harder for me".

 

I know this is fairly typical behaviour after being broken up with (he really did not want to break up) and I'm being as kind as I can. I feel guilty that I hurt him. I'm completely uninterested in getting back together with him, but I desperately miss the kitten and am intrigued by all these changes and important things he has to say. But I know it's a bad idea to see each other, if nothing else because I do not want to give him false hope.

 

Should I just ignore him the next time he contacts me? I don't want to be mean, but I know he won't be able to move on until we stop talking. I'm struggling with being tempted to visit to see the kitten and talk with him too. What should I do?

[InnocentMan]

Poor kitten. He/she will wonder where you are. They're not stupid. I miss my cat more than my ex. I had the chance to keep him too, but I thought my ex needed him more. You should think carefully before getting any pets, if your relationship isn't on solid ground.