freebird31 Posted December 15, 2013 Posted December 15, 2013 What do you say/ how should you act if you were to ever run into your ex ??? And if it didn't end on good terms. Should you act normal and keep it short? Or give the cold shoulder ? Me and me ex did not end on good terms. However, if I saw him. I DONT want him to think I'm bothered by it anymore. I would be polite but keep it short. Even tho I am still pissed at how he handled the BU I want to be seen as the bigger person . What do u guys think?
Author freebird31 Posted December 15, 2013 Author Posted December 15, 2013 Lol But what if they come up to you and talk to you? And you have no choice but to speak with them ?
TaraMaiden Posted December 15, 2013 Posted December 15, 2013 You always have a choice. "Hi, I'm good, thanks. Excuse me, I have an appointment with someone interesting." Or - "I'm sorry... remind me... and you are.....?" 1
Fangorn Posted December 15, 2013 Posted December 15, 2013 I would look her dead in the eye as she approached me and as she goes to open her mouth, I would hold out my finger and shush her. Then simply walk on and not look back. She has nothing to say I want to hear.
Author freebird31 Posted December 15, 2013 Author Posted December 15, 2013 Lmao @ all the responses. If he came up to me. Him: "hey! How are you!?! :D" (he'd be excited to see me for sure. Me: "I'm good, thanks. Hey I have to go do..*such&such*" I would politely dismiss myself and leave. I could never feel good about myself if I was a jerk to him. Sighs
TaraMaiden Posted December 15, 2013 Posted December 15, 2013 If he was a jerk to you, it's no more than he deserves - is it? 1
Author freebird31 Posted December 15, 2013 Author Posted December 15, 2013 If he was a jerk to you, it's no more than he deserves - is it? He deserves a lot more than a $hitty confrontation with me. But acting how he did, lowering myself to his ways wouldn't make me feel any better of a person. In any way. I don't take pleasure in acting resentful. I would keep it short bc there's nothing to say. Besides, don't you think it would boost his ego if he knew I was still mad over it? He would b much more taken away if he saw me carefree. 1
Author freebird31 Posted December 15, 2013 Author Posted December 15, 2013 I mean I wouldn't act bubbly or happy. I just wouldn't act mad either. I'd just be indifferent.
TaraMaiden Posted December 15, 2013 Posted December 15, 2013 You wouldn't be lowering yourself. You would be presenting an independent, free, dignified and confident persona. It would give him food for thought, in that he supposed you devastated, and here you are, perfectly well holding your chin up and sailing gaily on.... Indifferent is good. But with a thick icing-coating of confidence on top. I don't consider that being 'jerk-ish'. I consider making it quite clear that it's his loss - not yours. 1
Author freebird31 Posted December 15, 2013 Author Posted December 15, 2013 I don't think any thing I do or say at this point to him would matter or give him food for thought. And at this point I don't really think I should care what he feels/thinks anymore. Maybe for some people, giving a witty response works for them. But I'd just be polite and excuse my self. And yes, what you said. I would still make sure I come across as confident yet polite. But indifferent. Maybe just being the bigger more mature person and just walking away is easier less-dramatic. I mean depending on the circumstances. If he had cheated, that's harder to forgive. If that was the case I wouldn't give him the time of day.
Winter blue Posted December 16, 2013 Posted December 16, 2013 (edited) I will share what I did when bumping into my ex the other day. I was the same as the OP, just wanted to act indifferent, cold but polite. My ex saw my car but still walked into the restaurant I was having meal with my friend, she took the table behind us, looking this way as my friend told me later on. When we leave, she waved and smiled at me, I decided to go over to say hi, since her family was there too and they know me. She started some chit chat and I gave her simple answers, she probably thought I wasn't willing to chat in front of her family, she suggested us to catch up some other time, to which I politedly declined and said goodbye and walked out. I knew I could just ignore her, pretend I didn't see her. But I know I will feel bad if I did that, plus I do think that might gave her an ego boost seeing me still bitter and not letting go the past. It's never easy when you bumping into the ex! don't panic, just acknowledge their presence and be confident is the key Edited December 16, 2013 by Winter blue 1
maturityassets Posted December 16, 2013 Posted December 16, 2013 Haven't bumped into my ex but I have bumped into her sister a few times. She pretends to not see me so I don't really bother saying Hi. Not that I have a problem anymore. If I bumped into my ex probably just a quick how's everything and if the family is ok? Nothing more than that. No talk of what you've guys done since the break up... No need to apologize for anything... No need to be super friendly. just recognize one another's existence and carry on.
Shaine Posted December 16, 2013 Posted December 16, 2013 Before when i wasnt completely over him, either i would have given him the cold shoulder and evil eye or i will be overly friendly with him trying to pretend that im so happy with my life. But now that i am dating a much better man, i dont really care about my ex at all anymore. If i bump into him, i'll smile and nod and walk away. If he wants to talk to me, i'll keep it short and tell him i need to go meet my bf. lol. Or i'll just say i need to go, bye and smile.
Haydn Posted December 16, 2013 Posted December 16, 2013 Large gattling gun wold be useful. (Joke). Just a small toothpick!
im_thedude Posted December 16, 2013 Posted December 16, 2013 Knowing me, I would probably be equal parts awkward as hell and aloof. Personally I still harbor a lot of bad feelings toward/for my ex. So it wouldn't be pleasant.
sedgwick Posted December 17, 2013 Posted December 17, 2013 I saw mine on the street about a year after he dumped me. Fortunately, I was wearing my headphones, so I just turned up my music and kept on walking. Didn't even acknowledge him. 1
RespectfullyAlone Posted December 19, 2013 Posted December 19, 2013 I had an odd moment the other day. I was in a store buying some gifts, and I walk around the isle and see this girl. In fact it was her tattoo that got me going. Every part of my body is telling me this is my ex. She looked like her twin, same height, body shape, even the same fitness clothes she often wore. Her hair was up the same way, her hair dark too. My heart literally skipped a beat. I felt my face get really hot. I kept shopping and tried not to look back at her. I stole a few glances, trying to actually verify if it was her. This girl was pregnant, but still looked slim and fit. Pretty much she was an exact duplicate of my ex. Other than the tattoo. That was new, but she has a few so I figured she has just gotten a new one. I asked my mother the next day who sometimes sees my ex at Church about the tattoo. She said no, she didn't think me ex had any new ones. So this girl I saw, who was the spitting image, an identical twin of my ex, was not my ex. But the effect it had on my body, wow it sure felt real. That sense of panic, a tiny bit excited, face feeling so hot. It really freaked me out. Because even though this wasn't my ex, my body reacted as though it was, and that scares me because if I ever do run into her I sure as heck hope I'm not wearing my sad pathetic, the world has crushed me to paste face on. I want to be indifferent, oblivious, showing I've moved on, but I know I'll just fail at that too, and then she'll get confirmation I'm a loser, that the horrible way she left me, all her BS, was all justified. It'll give her even more power over me, and she has ALL the power still.
Recommended Posts