dub4502 Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 I'll give a quick run down. We met online, went on a great first date, drove around looking at Christmas lights, then decided to go get a drink, the date lasted a while...4 hours. 15 minutes after the date we both texted each other pretty much simultaneously, about what a great time we had. I didn't want to come off as needed/desperate so I couldn't decide if I wanted to text her the next day, well she got in touch first. We made small talk, and joked about how we both have broken all the "rules" of dating, then she asked when she would get to see me again. Sooner than later was my vote. So we decided to do something Saturday, I was thinking of going into the city, but turns out Saturday into Sunday is a blizzard...so I was thinking of inviting her over for a blizzard date...you know make dinner, watch movies, get snowed in, go sledding, etc. My intention is NOT to sleep with this girl...yet. But I feel if I ask her over for a this kind of date shes going to assume that's all I want. So question is...should I make it clear that's not my intention...make plans another day...or just invite her and see how she reacts. Normally I wouldn't give a **** if I didn't actually have any interest in her. But since I do have some interest I don't want to come off as only looking for one thing. Any advice would be great, thanks in advance!
carhill Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 Unless you live out in the sticks, there's plenty of fun stuff accessible even if it's snowing, of course presuming not a blizzard. If that, then simply reschedule for a better time/day as it's unsafe to be out in general in a blizzard. If this were someone you've been dating awhile, that's one thing, but just meeting and only having one date? Nah, I'd pass. Young people perhaps differ these days but in my generation, a woman a man is dating coming to a man's home alone (no one else around) signals one thing, and that's generally sex. The last time I was faced with your scenario (second date/snowstorm), we walked to the symphony and had a snack at a local cafe afterwards, whereupon I walked the lady home and returned to my apartment. Walking in the snow is kind of romantic. Back then the young ladies wore these beautiful mink coats and they were so warm. Anyway, that's my perspective. Nowadays, I'd only invite a lady over in such circumstances if we were going to get some rug burns in front of the fireplace while the cat looked on.
d0nnivain Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 If you call it a blizzard date & tell her your reasoning -- safety -- it might be OK. Give her the option of the other going into the city & let her chose.
Author dub4502 Posted December 13, 2013 Author Posted December 13, 2013 If you call it a blizzard date & tell her your reasoning -- safety -- it might be OK. Give her the option of the other going into the city & let her chose. Supposedly we are getting 6-12 inches of snow Saturday evening and through the night. That's the only reason i'm even considering this as an option. otherwise this wouldn't even be a discussion. Thanks for the feedback. Will give her options and put the ball in her court.
Andy_K Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 Give her two options - one at your place, one not - and let her choose which. That way, if she comes to your house it's of her own free choice and you can hardly be accused of just trying to bed her.
RedRobin Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 If a guy I met online came up with any pretense to ask me to his house on the second date, I'd assume he was after one thing. I'm tired of this approach and guys 'leaving it up to the woman' to have a clue. Show you have some class and save it for another time. Where I live 6-12 inches of snow ain't nothin'.... Take a taxi if it's that bad. 1
d0nnivain Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 Like RedRobin I wouldn't be thrilled with the idea of a blizzard date but I would be touched that the guy asked: date in vs. going out. I would probably pick reschedule because I don't like to drive in snow & wouldn't be comfortable staying "in" for a 2nd date. I do think it's OK for you to put it out there. Just understand if she says no.
freetolove Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 personally, if a guy invited me to his place I would feel like he's just looking for sex. i would plan something outside of the house and you can always make suggestion after if it feels right but for now. keep it outside. it'll make her appreciate you more. plus she might be curious why you didn't ask her in yet =P For ex, the guy I'm dating now. Our second date we were going for a drive. (great chemistry). He wanted to pick me up but I ended up suggesting that we meet at his place. (I was curious what his place looked like). When I got there he came out and we left...at the end of the nice he asked if I wanted to come up.. I felt in control of the whole thing so I happily accepted the invitation! =)
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