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Moving On

doubled

By doubled
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doubled Member

doubled

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It's been a while since my last post. I was very depressed for the Thanksgiving holiday because my ex wh had the kids. A girlfriend of mine was also alone so she took me on a little mini vacation and it was great. I missed my kids but I met a man. Turns out he lives a half hour from me. Small world. He has two grown kids and is a widower. Neither of us are looking for anything serious and we see each other on my nights off from the kids. It's just nice to smile and have someone to spend my time with.

 

Oh and it's driving my ex crazy which makes it even better.

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Ap22 Established Member

Ap22

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Good for you. Keep moving forward and best of luck!

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2.50 a gallon Established Member

2.50 a gallon

Posted
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I caught my Ex cheating, after telling her not to come home that night she moved in with the OM. When she came by to get her things, she tried to throw her new love in my face.

 

 

A month later she came by out apartment complex to party with the next door neighbor and knocked on my doors saying she wanted to spend some time with our cats. And again she tried to tell me how much she loved her new man.

 

 

That is until she got ready to leave she threw her empty can of soda in the trash, and noticed an empty champagne bottle. She rushed to our bedroom and knew immediately that I had not slept alone the previous night.

 

 

Instantly she did a 180 and wanted me back, complete with a waterfall of tears.

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experiencethedevine Established Member

experiencethedevine

Posted
Posted (edited)
It's been a while since my last post. I was very depressed for the Thanksgiving holiday because my ex wh had the kids. A girlfriend of mine was also alone so she took me on a little mini vacation and it was great. I missed my kids but I met a man. Turns out he lives a half hour from me. Small world. He has two grown kids and is a widower. Neither of us are looking for anything serious and we see each other on my nights off from the kids. It's just nice to smile and have someone to spend my time with.

 

Oh and it's driving my ex crazy which makes it even better.

 

 

This will give hope and encouragement to many. I am delighted and it proves that anything can, and does happen! I'm genuinely thrilled for you.

 

 

The fact that it is driving your ex husband mad is because while he supposedly didn't want you, it is shocking to his fragile ego that another man does! Despite the fact that he chose to leave you, he now faces the reality that you are not pining for him.

 

 

Honestly, this always makes me giggle. Some men really are twats aren't they?

Edited by experiencethedevine
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longjourney Established Member

longjourney

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I'm very happy for you Doubled. It must have been very difficult to not have your kids with you for such a family oriented holiday. That is EXACTLY the reason I think my WH is staying with me, for the kids, so he doesn't have to spend these holidays without them. Good to see you are strong enough to stand on your own.

 

 

I read one of your early posts that your DDay was November 30th, this must have been an extremely hard day for you to get through knowing your WH was spending it with the OW and your kids. My brain explodes just even thinking about it.

 

 

Well I am glad you are distracted from your divorce by this other man. He has grown children while yours are so young, he must have started VERY early, or he is just a much older man. I know my self esteem could use a boost, I wouldn't mind how old the man was. LOL That just speaks volumes to how these LTAs shatter our self esteem. I am very happy you are distracted and feeling better, even if it is only for a few days. And if your WH is upset by it, I guess you have your answer to his character, he only wants what he cannot have. Typical WH behavior. Glad you finally got away from him.

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doubled Member

doubled

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That day is always tough long journey and you are right it was even harder this year because I realized it really did destroy everything I had. This man I met is older than me and started young. Not sugar daddy old tho. lol. I'm just trying to have some fun for now. I've realized that I need it and it's time to think about myself when the kids aren't here. They will always be my priority except every other weekend and one night a week.

whiterabbit46 Member

whiterabbit46

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Isn't it interesting how the xH is upset about your new situation? When I married Mrs. Rabbit, her POSXH was flabbergasted that she could move on with her life. He felt that she would never really get over him, although considering the hell he put her through for 12 years, he shouldn't have been too surprised. And when he found out she was expecting our son, he was REALLY floored and upset. Poor fellow! Hehehe.

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longjourney Established Member

longjourney

Posted
Posted
That day is always tough long journey and you are right it was even harder this year because I realized it really did destroy everything I had. This man I met is older than me and started young. Not sugar daddy old tho. lol. I'm just trying to have some fun for now. I've realized that I need it and it's time to think about myself when the kids aren't here. They will always be my priority except every other weekend and one night a week.

 

I am SO looking to move on, but I still love my WH. Do you not ever regret breaking up your family? Yes I know your WH is the one who made the original break and betrayed you for years. My WH is telling me he wants to try but he also loves the OW. You had a remorseful WH, he was doing the work, but you decided to end things. Do you regret calling an end to your family? I am thinking and rethinking every step I make CONSTANTLY. What made you think your family wasn't worth salvaging any longer? Yes I do realize your WH is with the OW, and it may be my own experience talking, but it seems as if he probably was still emotionally connected to her during your R since he returned to her (yet another recurring thought I have). Weren't your children worth it? You said your WH was doing everything right that he helped you through your hard days that he addressed your issues. How do you sit with yourself? Do you feel guilt? I cannot imagine that day ever coming for me. My IC does tell me it will get easier, but I can't see being the one to end our M and drop the ax. Don't you HATE the idea of your children being around the OW? Your WH now has it all and your/our lives are still shattered. If anything that makes me angry.

 

 

Doubled I don't want you to think I am pointing fingers. I am looking for a path to take and posting and reading here gives me more clarity then my IC sessions. It feels like that anyway. Thanks for listening.

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doubled Member

doubled

Posted
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It was really hard to walk away and yes there are days I regret it. It was the double betrayal that really hurt. The fact that the ow was a part of our lives. He is only with her now because he can't be alone and if I was willing he would come back and try to R again. I watched my sister go through the same thing and I just got to the point I knew I couldn't forgive or get past it. Please don't let my story sway your decision. If your husband is really trying and you love him than you should keep trying. Only you without anyone else's advice or opinion can decide if you can get past it. I wish you luck long journey and I do hope you can get past it and be happy. I'm sorry for anyone who has to go through what we did.

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