ButterRum Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 I want to start off saying that I got out of a 10 year relationship where we were to be married within the next year or so. He had a case of grass is greener and broke it off with me suddenly. This was 5 months ago. I have had terrible emotional states since then and slowly getting better. My problem recently is that I am angry at him for everything. I am angry that he blamed all the reasons for breaking up on me when he also clearly had issues. I remember all the messed up stuff he said to me and it makes my blood boil. Other days I'm sad and just wish he would come back even though I know I can never feel the same way for him or even trust him ever again. I guess I'm not looking for advice but just needed a place to vent and help me organize my thoughts. I've been lurking around LS for a while and so far have felt 100 times better after reading everyone's stories and advice. Any body else in this 'breaking emotional ties' predicament?
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 U need to try & remember the pain he has put u through & focus on that x I know exactly how u feel I'm 5 months post BU & he completely blamed me too when he has his own issues ! It's called projecting x chin up xx 3
firststeps Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 Totally know how you feel. Its been 3 months for me. We were together for 20 and he left me for OW. There are good days and bad days, and sometimes its getting through hour by hour. lt is so easy to get sucked in to the memories and what you once had, perhaps its a way to escape the pain, but it only makes it harder. Little by little lm doing more stuff for me, and going to counseling and reaching out to friends. This is a great site and it has helped me by having a place to vent, sympathize with others and relate to others. You are not alone, this is a community and your part of us. l know that as you, its going to be a long road to recovery, but take one day at a time. thats what lm trying to focus on. 2
realfriends Posted December 26, 2013 Posted December 26, 2013 Anger is just one of the stages of grief that we all go through so it means you are healing. Are you in NC with him? One thing that is helping me get through this is the post here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/251986-grass-greener-syndrome For some reason, reading it makes me feel a tiny bit better and just reminds me of the steps I need to continue to take.
LadyM Posted December 26, 2013 Posted December 26, 2013 Oh, the twisted irony of wanting them to come back, knowing that we can never feel the same about them and certainly never trust them. I know that my ex is bad news, yet here I am, spending way too much time and effort thinking of him and so badly wanting him to reach out to me. It's utter madness!
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