SonOfAGun Posted December 11, 2013 Posted December 11, 2013 Hi Everyone Firstly I'd just like to say how glad I am that I found this place! The amount of good advice I've read on here has definitely helped me move towards finding the closure I need to move on. My GF dumped me out of the blue at the end of October. We were together for a few months so my problem pales in comparison to some of you guys on here! I realise now that while it seemed out of the blue for me she obviously must've been thinking about it for a while. She txt me saying she wasn't ready for a relationship and that she just wanted to be friends. I was shocked and disappointed obviously but I told her not to worry, I honestly thought she'd be back in touch with me after she had a bit of time to think. It came as a shock as we got on great together, we made each other laugh, we had good sex and there was a lot of intimacy between us. It felt like there was a real connection between us. The last time I saw her was no different, she seemed really happy and she txt me the next morning saying what a nice time she had and we talked about when were were gonna see each other next. Then a few hours later she dropped the bombshell. I left it a few days and sent her a message asking how she was. She was quite abrupt and cold towards me and said that she just wants to be on her own, I asked her why she didn't say anything to me the last time we met, she said she's not arguing with me and that was that. I've not contacted her since, just over 5 weeks, which has been quite hard. I just couldn't understand why someone who was so close and intimate with me just days before didn't want to know me anymore? It became increasingly obvious that there was more to it than her simply wanting to be on her own and that there was probably another guy. The next couple of weeks were a real struggle, I couldn't sleep and couldn't think about anyone else. I missed her so much. Stupidly, I kept checking her Facebook, just for false hope I guess. I'm not sure why I didnt unfriend her, I just wanted to show her I was getting on with my life I suppose, which was stupid because she clearly didn't care about me anymore. I maintained NC and stopped checking her FB and I began to feel much better, I still thought of her a lot but that sinking feeling I had in my gut whenever I thought of her slowly began to disappear. However, on Sunday I relapsed and checked her FB, big mistake. Surprise surprise she is now in a relationship. I knew deep down there was another guy but to see it there, confirmed in black and White was a huge kick in the teeth. For the last couple of days those feelings have c
RDawg Posted December 11, 2013 Posted December 11, 2013 Hey SonOfAGun It's a painful lesson to have learnt. Something all of us have been through. It's best to just avoid relationships, it's the only real way to prevent this sort of thing from happening. All the best for your recovery.
notthathard Posted December 11, 2013 Posted December 11, 2013 Could it be one of her ex's? Otherwise she was with other guy/s at the same time as being with you. Good you got rid of her nice and early, I wouldn't want to stay with a girl like that. She will probably jump around her whole life.
Author SonOfAGun Posted December 11, 2013 Author Posted December 11, 2013 Could it be one of her ex's? Otherwise she was with other guy/s at the same time as being with you. Good you got rid of her nice and early, I wouldn't want to stay with a girl like that. She will probably jump around her whole life. Tbh I thought that it might be someone from her past, it would certainly explain how she chucked me all of a sudden and would explain how quickly she jumped into another relationship. The thing that sucks is that if this is the case, she was obviously talking to him when she was with me, and all the times she was whispering sweet nothings to me telling me how much she liked me & wants to make a go of things was all one big lie, and that sucks. But once I'm over her I'll look back at it as a bullet dodged.
ponchsox Posted December 11, 2013 Posted December 11, 2013 Sorry man, sounds like she's back with someone or found someone else. The reason they act cold towards you is because you are no longer wanted and you become a nuisance to them post breakup.
KelC411 Posted December 11, 2013 Posted December 11, 2013 Facebook, for all its positives, is the worst. I went to unfriend my ex's mom (because she posts pics of him, etc) and saw he had tagged her in a post about getting a recipe to cook for his new "somene special." This was less than two weeks after he left, and I suspected this other girl was involved. But to see him cooking for her and calling her special so publicly was like being kicked in the stomach. Like you, I now know that for at least the last month of our relationship, while he was still telling me he loved me and cuddling with me, he was already talking to her and connecting with her. I hooe one day both of us can look back and realize we deserve better than someone who will stick with us or at the very least be honest with us. Hang in there and go on Facebook blackout. That has helped me.
Author SonOfAGun Posted December 11, 2013 Author Posted December 11, 2013 Sorry to hear that KelC, it really is a horrible thing to go through. The fact that you're emotionally invested in them while they're just lying to you. Her Facebook had to go, it's strange, despite the way she treated me & how quick she moved on I still found it so hard to block her & sever all ties. As hard as it is we have to look at it as a blessing in disguise as they're obviously not the right one. We just gotta hang in there and I'm sure we'll find the right person eventually.
KelC411 Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 Sorry to hear that KelC, it really is a horrible thing to go through. The fact that you're emotionally invested in them while they're just lying to you. Her Facebook had to go, it's strange, despite the way she treated me & how quick she moved on I still found it so hard to block her & sever all ties. As hard as it is we have to look at it as a blessing in disguise as they're obviously not the right one. We just gotta hang in there and I'm sure we'll find the right person eventually. Agreed that no matter how they treated us, it is so hard to sever ties. It makes it feel real I guess, even though I suppose we should already know that. Ugh. Heartbreak suckkkssssss
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