WarehouseMyka Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 I don't know if my girlfriend is my girlfriend anymore. We've been together for over a year and spent our one year anniversary together on the 28th after that everything has gone down hill between us and i don't know why. She had been ignoring me for the last week, her lack of interest in me very clear, she say's that she is feeling depressed and suicidal and i feel guilty for questioning if she is been honest as she has said that in the past to get away with her lies and speaking to her ex, which is who i caught her speaking to again. After confronting her and her lying to me again i told ill go and ask the ex if shes speaking to him if she wants to continue lying, she then threatened to leave me and i asked her does that mean its over between us and all she replies with is I Don't Know, any question i ask about us is given the reply of i don't know and not knowing is making my head feel messed with. I don't know if we are still together or if its over between us and it's been like this for two days. Yesterday night i said to her that i was backing off till she could tell me if she wanted to be with me or not, she completely lost it with me and implied i was abandoning her and leaving her to deal with her depression alone but i'm finding it hard to cope pretending nothing is wrong. She stopped speaking to me, i tried calling her and she blocked my number, i then noticed this guy from Uni added her to xbox, i have been feeling suspicious of her with him since the day she conveniently privated off her relationship status to just my family and her best friend the day he adds her to Facebook, i noticed this because she lets me use her live when i don't have live on my account. So this morning we speak until she says that everything always has to be about me, if i'm not mistaken this past week and all of our relationship has been about her, if its not she makes sure it is, i stopped speaking after that because knowing what i do for her, that just yesterday i ordered snack's online to be delivered to her house as she said she wasn't eating, it really got to me. After about an hour she said she loves me and shes sorry, now please don't be mistaken like i was because this was her leading me into a false security, thinking we are okay because half an hour later she lets me have it. Basically she says i require too much from her by asking for normal relationship things like saying goodnight, spending time with me and telling me she loves me, she went on to imply that she has to take care of me as if i'm handicap and she can't handle it, she doesn't take care of me, most of her time is spent pointing out every negative point she can make about me or our relationship. So here i am right back at square one, sitting talking, not allowed to mention anything to do with us and if i ask are we still together she says I Don't Know. I can't leave, i don't know if i can stay, my head is so messed up off all of this, i love her and i want to stay with her but i have the awful gut instinct that something is going on.
tlegend Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 1) Something is going on 2) Leave her 3) You are in college. There are literally thousands of other prospects. Go out and have fun.
MasonJarTeaDrinker Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 She's acting weird and honestly just go with your gut feeling. There's a reason why girls act that way and you already know what is going on so just let her go and before you know it you're gonna get over her. Or she might realize she messed up, but whatever the case is, just stay strong.
panoramicview Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 OP, I think it is very considerate that you are taking her feelings into consideration, but you must also think about your needs. I believe if you step back and look at her actions, it is clear that she is manipulating and emotionally black mailing you. She needs you there to support her during her depression, yet she implies you are too needy for wanting her to act like a girlfriend. She is accusing you of abandoning her, when quite frankly, it is the other way around. She has abandoned your relationship. If she has been talking to others during this time, she may be trying to test the waters before making her exit. It seems as if she is questioning whether you can provide her the relationship she wants and may be looking elsewhere. These are only assumptions, but her behavior seems to be indicative. But, OP you ultimately have to decide whether you can live with being in relationship limbo and not getting your needs met just to be her security blanket. If she truly is confused, space is the best for both of you to figure things out.
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