lillybear1 Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 My boyfriend and I have been official for 2 months now, but we have been going on dates consistently for closer to 5 months. We are both in our 20s. This weekend, I drove up to his place (he lives an hour away from me) and we went to a Christmas party. It was at a place with rooms, and he kind of hinted about staying, but not super bluntly, and I shrugged it off because he had not told me beforehand, so I had not brought any of my things. By the time we got back to his place, it was around 11. I have definitely driven home later than that, but he was like, "Are you good to go?" And I looked at him b/c I didn't know what he was talking about and he was like, "I mean, do you want a place to stay instead of driving back? You're welcome to stay the night." I told him I hadn't brought my things and he said that's what he figured and seemed rather disappointed. I went into his place for a bit anyway, and he kept finding things to talk about to keep me hanging around. I think he wanted to make the next move, but I'm not sure. We've only kissed. We've been taking it pretty slow. It just took me by surprise. What do y'all think? Was it an innocent "you're tired and it's late" invitation or was it more a "I want to make the next move" kind of thing?
tlegend Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 He's getting antsy. You have said you both were taking it slow, and in a few months time, you have only kissed. I think he's slowly testing the waters to see if you would like to take it to the "next level", but he's doing it in a way so he can appear to be joking if you have a negative reaction to it. Make your decision, and then let him know in a similar fashion as it seems opening up your heart at 20 is fairly rare.
OrangeSnack Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 Speaking from my previous experience, I did it to several girls (granted, we had too much to drink at my place and I didn't want them to get a DUI) I asked politely that they stay over and they can have my bed while I sleep on the couch. But then one thing led to another and I ended up on my bed next to her. My initial intention was not to get them into bed. I just didnt feel comfortable letting them drive under the influence. In your situation, I don't now. Were you guys drinking?
Author lillybear1 Posted December 10, 2013 Author Posted December 10, 2013 We were not drinking. He had had a few much earlier in the night and was sober. I did not have any.
365daysgone Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 Are you ok to take it to the next level? Have you had sex before or would this be the first time? Im curious.
veggirl Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 Of course he wanted to take the next step! You've been dating for 5 months! He saw his opportunity and (awkwardly, passively) went for it. Are you both new to relationships?
d0nnivain Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 You have been dating for 5 months even if it's only been official for 2. What do you want to do? If it was late & you were tired or had been drinking you could have stayed on his couch for safety reasons.
MasonJarTeaDrinker Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 It's probably a little of both, but he's taking a little too long now he's probably shy.
Dallers Posted December 10, 2013 Posted December 10, 2013 5 months is a long time. Sorry but I would be getting antsy as well. Gosh if he likes you as much as most of the woman I like I would be sweating buckets hanging on longer than 2-3 tops. Not saying I wouldn't, but unless there is some underlying reason to not have sex then why are you not having sex? You could be dead tomorrow. Sex is so important in a relationship, if you do not want to have sex then you might not be compatible and maybe are just friends. Men can be shy, but when it comes to sex, unless we have hormonal trouble we do not need 5 months, 5 days sounds about right to me.
KatZee Posted December 11, 2013 Posted December 11, 2013 I mean... you've been dating for 5 months... officially bf/gf for 2 months... neither of you are kids... what's stopping you from moving beyond kissing? This is his thought process right now. He wants to turn things up a notch.
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