alexjames Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 My ex broke up with me 2 months ago. We only had a short relationship (a few months) but everything seemed so perfect to me. She was the most beautiful girl I've ever known, she was funny, clever, had a lovely family upbringing, held a good job, it all seemed so great. But she left me after a couple of arguments and I am still heartbroken and break down when I think about her. It was a work mate who set us up, as she is friendly with my ex's family. When I was at work Tonight, she asked me if I had seen *****'s (my ex) facebook. I told her I haven't (I deleted her the moment she ended it) and then she went on to tell me how she is in a new relationship with a guy and posting photo's of them together, all loved up and how happy she is etc...I am now a complete mess on the inside, but I didn't let my work mate see this. I can't stand knowing this... It's emotional agony!!! Link to post Share on other sites
LostConfused123 Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 My ex broke up with me 2 months ago. We only had a short relationship (a few months) but everything seemed so perfect to me. She was the most beautiful girl I've ever known, she was funny, clever, had a lovely family upbringing, held a good job, it all seemed so great. But she left me after a couple of arguments and I am still heartbroken and break down when I think about her. It was a work mate who set us up, as she is friendly with my ex's family. When I was at work Tonight, she asked me if I had seen *****'s (my ex) facebook. I told her I haven't (I deleted her the moment she ended it) and then she went on to tell me how she is in a new relationship with a guy and posting photo's of them together, all loved up and how happy she is etc...I am now a complete mess on the inside, but I didn't let my work mate see this. I can't stand knowing this... It's emotional agony!!! That was absolutely horrible that she brought that to your attention! I'm so sorry you got hurt. It's weird though that she would do that in the first place. I don't want to give you false hope but I can't help but wonder what her motives could be unless she (an your ex) were trying to make you jealous for some reason. Do you think that may be the case and this story was fabricated? Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 9, 2013 Author Share Posted December 9, 2013 That was absolutely horrible that she brought that to your attention! I'm so sorry you got hurt. It's weird though that she would do that in the first place. I don't want to give you false hope but I can't help but wonder what her motives could be unless she (an your ex) were trying to make you jealous for some reason. Do you think that may be the case and this story was fabricated? Unfortunately not. When she left me she said she didn't want to hear from me again and when I did try to contact her (the week after BU) she spoke to me a little bit but made it clear she doesn't want to see or speak to me again. I tried winning her back but she wasn't interested. I really miss her and my feelings I have for her are so strong still. She was my little beautiful girl and I was in dream world, now she is with someone else and doesn't care about me and I bet I haven't even been in her thoughts since I last spoke to her Link to post Share on other sites
maturityassets Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 I'm sorry man but it's over and you should be thankful... You learn from it and it's better just a few months than investing a few years.. We all think our exes are beautiful for a while then you move on and you think "well there are just even as pretty and even prettier girls out there". And it's true. I don't know your ex personally and I don't like labeling people stuff but maybe commitmentment phone? All love dovey in the beginning and then ends it? Really doesn't matter, you're free. No longer can give yourself false hope that she changes her mind. I promise you if you move on you would tell yourself regardless that you wouldn't want them back. Just give it time and best of luck 2 Link to post Share on other sites
robbysurfs Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 I am really sorry about that man I feel your pain you are not alone there.The only good thing about this is you got the info you need to move on. It hurts like a mutha'fr but keep your chin up this to shall pass. You may always keep a spot and remember the good stuff even cringe a little bit but the pain is a good thing embrace it. It gets hard before it gets better and like my grandpa used to say "every knock is a boost"... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
LadyM Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 I know you would have probably found out sooner or later, but I think people who love to deliver news that will likely hurt you deeply, have a big cruel streak in them. She didn't have to tell you. She had a choice. There was no benefit to you knowing. One of the most painful parts of my own BU was that he left me for another woman. Knowing they are happy and in love compounds our misery. It just does. I can really feel for you. It's devastating. You're right - it's emotional agony. But I know in time you'll be doing better. And we are always here for you, too. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Meadowgreen Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 My ex broke up with me 2 months ago. We only had a short relationship (a few months) but everything seemed so perfect to me. She was the most beautiful girl I've ever known, she was funny, clever, had a lovely family upbringing, held a good job, it all seemed so great. But she left me after a couple of arguments and I am still heartbroken and break down when I think about her. It was a work mate who set us up, as she is friendly with my ex's family. When I was at work Tonight, she asked me if I had seen *****'s (my ex) facebook. I told her I haven't (I deleted her the moment she ended it) and then she went on to tell me how she is in a new relationship with a guy and posting photo's of them together, all loved up and how happy she is etc...I am now a complete mess on the inside, but I didn't let my work mate see this. I can't stand knowing this... It's emotional agony!!! Wow, firstly your co-worker is a ****-stirrer bringing that up, as if you need to know what your ex is up to! I've not read anyone's comments OP so forgive me if I'm treading over old ground, but all I can say is I really feel for your pain and know how hard this is. We all have regrets. We all have 'the one that got away', the one that makes us agonise over every detail 'if only I'd done this right, if only I hadn't started THIS argument, if only I answered the phone at that exact moment etc' stop stop STOP. Tormenting yourself will do you no good. What's happened has happened. She's moved on and so must you, but first you need to take this precious time to love and improve yourself. Join a gym, get out with friends (Yelp and Meetup are brilliant ways to meet new people and do fun things like check out new restaurants and local things to do) eat healthy, start a diary and write down everything you're feeling, make some goals, reflect on what you learned from the experience. You WILL move on and find someone much more suited to you if you make an effort to prioritise your heart and your future from now on. I wish you the best of luck 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 10, 2013 Author Share Posted December 10, 2013 Thank you for the replies. I keep telling myself that it is over and that I owe it to myself to not get all upset thinking about her etc, but I just can't. We went clubbing together a couple of times, and honestly, she would have about 10 guys around her, trying to dance with her, touching her, asking her for ''things'' every night all night we went out, so it wasn't just me who found her really great looking haha, she got more attention than anybody, which was hard to take on my behalf if I'm honest! But the thought of seeing her with her new man in the clubs or out walking etc, while I'm still struggling getting over her is a nasty thought. Not a day has passed that I haven't thought about her and brought myself crashing down. I'm quite a shy, quiet guy and self conscious (I look like a 14 year old so that don't help (I'm 21)) so I don't even know how or where to meet girls, I really don't feel ''complete'' being alone, and I won't just go with anybody, but I can see myself being single for a long while, and the longer it lasts, the longer my ex will be in my mind and getting to me Link to post Share on other sites
Daffodil74 Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 I don't think highly of your work mate nor your ex. 2 months after BU and she is already happy with someone else. She sounded like she didn't think serious about your relationship. I would feel lucky if I were you that your relationship ended after several months. But I felt your pain Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 10, 2013 Author Share Posted December 10, 2013 Decided to write on here as I was going to go on my ex's Facebook page, so quickly logged on here instead of doing that! Had a few reminders of her Today, anything from her favourite music on the radio, to finding the receipt to the top I bought her in my room, my work mate yet again telling me things about her and her new BF (although she isn't trying to hurt me), everybody getting excited for christmas with their partners etc and I haven't got anyone to enjoy it with, all sorts Today have upset me. I really don't know why I'm still like this, but I can't take my mind off her! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Meadowgreen Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 Decided to write on here as I was going to go on my ex's Facebook page, so quickly logged on here instead of doing that! Had a few reminders of her Today, anything from her favourite music on the radio, to finding the receipt to the top I bought her in my room, my work mate yet again telling me things about her and her new BF (although she isn't trying to hurt me), everybody getting excited for christmas with their partners etc and I haven't got anyone to enjoy it with, all sorts Today have upset me. I really don't know why I'm still like this, but I can't take my mind off her! You need to tell your workmate straight to STFU. You'll never move on while you're getting on-the-minute updates. Seriously is she obsessed with this girl or something? She must have other things to talk about :/ Sorry this day was pants. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Honeybun11 Posted December 12, 2013 Share Posted December 12, 2013 The exact same thing has happened to me, I was with my ex for a year and we were supposed to move out together and stuff and we talked of marriage and children. But in September he broke up with me, I was heart broken and hurt but he said that we might get back together one day when he's ready to move out and stuff, but I found out a few weeks a go that he's seeing someone else ALREADY - after 2 months!! It just makes me think how can someone go from loving someone (apparently) so much and then move on that quickly to someone else. It pains me to say it but either he didn't love me like he (or I) thought he did, or she's just a rebound? I don't know I guess time will tell. But for now I am absolutely devastated because I feel like I meant nothing to him if he can just move on that quickly! I'm going to try hypnotherapy I think because it takes me all day to feel a little better but then when I go to sleep I dream about him and wake up feeling bad again. I guess the best thing to do is to keep busy and just hope that time is on your side and will heal your pain. In my experience, I have just woken up before and the pain has gone so I'm hoping that will happen again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 12, 2013 Author Share Posted December 12, 2013 The exact same thing has happened to me, I was with my ex for a year and we were supposed to move out together and stuff and we talked of marriage and children. But in September he broke up with me, I was heart broken and hurt but he said that we might get back together one day when he's ready to move out and stuff, but I found out a few weeks a go that he's seeing someone else ALREADY - after 2 months!! It just makes me think how can someone go from loving someone (apparently) so much and then move on that quickly to someone else. It pains me to say it but either he didn't love me like he (or I) thought he did, or she's just a rebound? I don't know I guess time will tell. But for now I am absolutely devastated because I feel like I meant nothing to him if he can just move on that quickly! I'm going to try hypnotherapy I think because it takes me all day to feel a little better but then when I go to sleep I dream about him and wake up feeling bad again. I guess the best thing to do is to keep busy and just hope that time is on your side and will heal your pain. In my experience, I have just woken up before and the pain has gone so I'm hoping that will happen again. I'm so sorry to hear this. It is so heartbreaking, and you can't see yourself feeling better or getting over them, it's horrible. My previous ex (and first ever GF) left me back in February and I still think of her everyday and I only found out Yesterday that she is with her ex before she met me, so I'm really low now! Christmas last year was by far the best of my life as I had someone to share it with, this year all I think is how I would have been spending it with my beautiful ex, but instead I'll be alone and she'll be with her new bloke. I drive past her workplace everyday on the way to my work and even that is hell! What an utter horrible feeling it is! Link to post Share on other sites
Insanityisdoingsame Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 Gotta say bro , thats a low blow right there. This skank has moved on with a new guy and has the audacity to tell you about it. Rubbin it in... Delete her number and block her fb/phone. Skanks like that have no place in our ❤️. Do you, and this too shall pass Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 16, 2013 Author Share Posted December 16, 2013 Had a real bad day Today. All day, all I've thought about is my ex. I have been told more stories by people about how she is always on facebook going on about this new guy (she NEVER wrote about me once on there and when we got together she refused to even put it on there that we were together for a while). Also (and this really upset me and made me feel really low), I go clubbing most weekends. The club I go too has it's own facebook page, which I ''liked'' a year or so back. Everytime I go there with my mates, a photographer takes pictures, and posts them on their page. This morning, it came on my ''newsfeed'' of the pics from the weekend (I didn't go out this week due to low finances) and one of the 6 pictures that appeared was, you guessed it, of her and 2 of her mates. She looked stunning, the type of picture you look at and think ''what a beautiful girl.. she is gorgeous''. I will admit I had a few tears in my eyes. I feel so low, and all I do is think about her, even when I keep myself busy, she clouds all my thoughts... I can't take this much longer :'( Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 16, 2013 Author Share Posted December 16, 2013 Wish I could, trouble is, I'm their supervisor/boss at work, so I can't really do or say much. I've done well and avoided looking at her facebook, but when (it will happen as there is only one club in our town and we both go out) I see her out, I really don't know what I'll be like. It will be such a kick in the nuts and I'll want to break down there and then.. I'm scared! Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 16, 2013 Author Share Posted December 16, 2013 I do, but the hour dinner breaks and tea breaks etc don't help matters unfortunately! But to be honest, even if they never mentioned her, I would still have been thinking about her constantly. She's eating up all my thoughts, and I don't know why... I got told that her new BF is a bit of an ''emo/gothic'' type person, which made me laugh! Everywhere I look I can see, hear, feel her..it's getting ridiculous! Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 17, 2013 Author Share Posted December 17, 2013 On here again as all I've done tonight is think about her and getting all upset, so before I do the stupid thing and go on her facebook profile, I logged on here instead, sorry if this thread is annoying you all! I am friends with the photographer from the club I mentioned (she is my best friends' girlfriend) so I was talking to her on FB tonight and she was saying how my ex was acting in the club Saturday night (I asked her) she said she was dancing and kissing various guys, acting really ''slutty'' most of the night, grinding with every guy near her, which is what she done when she was with me even and she is with a guy now, so she hasn't changed at all and quite clearly only really thinks for herself. I really shouldn't get upset over her as clearly she never gave a stuff about me and I'm probably better off with out and should look to meet a girl who wants to be with me etc rather than than mope about a beautiful, stunning girl but at the same time don't care about me... But it's hard to tell myself that! Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 18, 2013 Author Share Posted December 18, 2013 Just found out that she was also with her new boyfriend, but she was with her mates and he was with his, but all in the same place, and my friend (the photographer) is friends with her new bf... it just gets worse! Next time I go out, I'll bump into her and him and if I'm talking to my friend, she will mix with my ex's friend aswell, and we are all bound to end up in a big group.... I am dreading going out, but at the same time I don't want her to stop me from going to my favourite places with my mates, but I've got tears in my eyes thinking about her and how happy she is with a new guy and here I am feeling the lowest and loneliest I've ever felt..... I really do hate life at the moment and it's only going to get worse :'( Link to post Share on other sites
ponchsox Posted December 18, 2013 Share Posted December 18, 2013 Good for her! Now find your new woman. Link to post Share on other sites
Midwest Wtiter Posted December 18, 2013 Share Posted December 18, 2013 Give it a few months...their honeymoon stage is going to wear off. He's a rebound. Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 18, 2013 Author Share Posted December 18, 2013 Good for her! Now find your new woman. Wish I could! I don't know HOW to meet somebody! I'm quite shy, I go out clubbing occasionally (probably not again for a little while as my ex and her new guy will be there and I can't bare seeing them), I work every weekday from noon till 9 and go to football (follow my team) around the country most Saturdays! But despite all this, I really want to meet a girl and be happy. I'm very self concious aswell as I look like a 14 year old boy (I'm 21) and fairly shy... How on Earth do I meet her?! My first ex was through meeting her online and the second was set up through a work mate (the one who keep telling me things about her), so I'm pretty useless to be honest! Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexjames Posted December 20, 2013 Author Share Posted December 20, 2013 Instead of worrying and keep getting all upset about things, I am going to TRY and think positive! If I think about bumping into either of my ex's with or without their new partners, I will just walk by and think to myself that if she was worth it then we'd still be together and it'd be an injustice to me if they stayed with me as all it would be doing was constantly giving me false hope. I said to someone on Facebook this morning ''trying hard today to look forward instead of back, and think about how I have my whole life ahead of me, so why should I let 2 people from my past ruin what will happen in the future?! When someone truly special comes along, I will be glad I didn't stick with what I once had!! Need to try and think positive !'' Thank you anybody that has given me help/advice/support, it has helped a lot Link to post Share on other sites
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