Broken Heart

[Broken_Heart88]

It has been a month since i broke up, we have been together for 4 months.

 

My ex... lied to me... again and again...

 

Before we were together, she told me all about her past. She hide nothing from me. Her past relationships, her difficult life, etc.

 

She met a guy through some online chat, they have never met before; even though they lived in different country but she said they were in love. They were having some issue and she approached me, we slowly became close.

 

We struggled for few months before getting into a relationship. I know about that guy and i thought i could help her through it. I gave her my best, i put everything into this relationship and it is my first relationship. She told me... I treated her too good and by far her best BF ever. Even her family members seem to like me. We were having great time together.

 

One day, I happened to found out that she was still in contact with the guy. They were still talking very sweetly and intimate. I confronted her, she cried and apologized while promising she will give him up. She told me that guy could not give her the happiness she wanted. I decided to gave her chance or maybe i was just giving this relationship another chance.

 

But again... she was still in contact with him and again... i forgiven her. This repeated for a few times. I told her i am starting to have trust issue, she promised me again it will be the last time and she will never contact him again. Maybe i was too naive, but i was thinking they were just some virtual relationship. I wanted to help her out of it and still gave her my best.

 

But something worse happened. It was the day of my graduation. During night time, she told me she wanted to meet a mutual girl friend. I have the habit of fetching and sending her home no matter how late she went out. That night, when i sent her home, she happened to left her phone on my car. I turned on her phone and saw that it was another guy who asked if she was home safely.

 

I broke down on the spot and confronted her again. My heart utterly hurt. I wasn't sure which is more painful, physically or mentally. I was hurting myself infront of her (Punching and banging my head on the wall). The physical pain couldn't be compared to my heart; it was aching. I know it was stupid thing to do, i wasn't thinking correctly and i was hurting so much.

 

I tried... giving her the best i could. I know i should not be contacting her anymore. But somewhere deep down, i still have the urge; wanting to protect her and help her. I still feel like contacting her to check if she was doing fine. Sometime, i am wondering... am i a substitute for his virtual BF. Trust is such a fragile thing in a relationship and yet she betrayed it again and again.

 

I can say, i have no regret in this relation. But, i just can't stop missing her. I still think I'm in love with her. Maybe she was having her difficult time too. How can i forget someone who gave me so much to remember.

[Chi townD]

Sucks when you're the only one in the relationship. Dude, she never was your girlfriend. You were someone to cool her heels with because she couldn't physically be with this other guy.

 

She was cheating on you with two guys. One, long distance and the other and can only assume is local. So, she was probably have a Physical affair with the local guy and an Emotional Affair with the guy that's long distance.

 

Time to let go. Go NO CONTACT on her. Do not respond to anything she sends your way. Ignore texts and let phonecalls go to voicemail. And above all else, BLOCK HER ON FACEBOOK!!!

 

I promise you that there a girl out there that will want to be with you and you alone because there's no other place on the planet that she would rather be. She's out there and she's waiting for you to find her.

 

And do me a favor? Stop physically beating yourself up! That's childish and stupid. Plus it makes you look like a psycho. I know you're hurting, been there and done that, but I truly believe your above doing that.