vieillot Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 So let me start with our background.We are always doing the long distance thing when she was in Turkey living in Istanbul. First years of our relationship I was the bad guy not showing interest to my girlfriend because didn't know long time relationships that hard and couldn't handle it. After that year I realized I was torturing her and chose her over my friends started to show some interest more. Then we were quite good together again so we had a great relationship even we are always far away to each other. Last summer was the decision time. She had the opportunity to come live with me or live in London over Ankara. We discussed a lot and decided she wanted to go London and I supported her after we made the decision. She has been in London for six months there was no problem at all until last week. So It all started when her cousin said to her she has the capability living her own life without me . First she didn't tell me this situation keep as secret. After one or two weeks from that we were having an argument about little things then she told me her cousins stupid thoughts bugging her and she said my attitude fed this thought. Anyways I was quite dumb to make over pressure her with my paranoia and jealousy when she were hanging with her friends night time last sunday. It back fired too hard. She said to me I am break away from you slowly. I realized I was over pressing her and making her away from me and I apologized and promised this over pressure thing will never happen again. But since Sunday It's not going well neither.I always told her I will never treat you like that again but her feelings are destroyed I guess.My lack of confidence and lack of trust hurt her. We were discussing our relationship a lot since sunday so pessimistic. Now she told me thursday night I am judging my feelings . Now we decided not to talk over facebook skype etc. until she wants to. Is it a good approach (not talking on skype facebook) to this situation? I am kinda destroyed and my hands are tied don't know what to do. What am I supposed to do now? Now we are not talking since thursday night. I bought a gift for her one day before we stopped talking. And she got the gift after we stop talking and she texted me "I couldn't hold myself and send a message to you and got the gift and liked very much but we re still not talking". At least this message give me little hope and she is coming to here in one week.
Author vieillot Posted December 8, 2013 Author Posted December 8, 2013 quick update: She called me over skype after i posted this thread. We talked about what did we do since we stopped talking it was quite good conversation for me but she said she still feels complicated and our "not to talk rule" still going on until she wants again. I couldn't decide whether it was a good thing or not overall.
justwhoiam Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 I would tell her that "I'm buying a ticket to come there in 2 days, just the time to arrange things, so that you can tell me what you need to in person. I don't want anyone to string me along."
Author vieillot Posted December 8, 2013 Author Posted December 8, 2013 I would tell her that "I'm buying a ticket to come there in 2 days, just the time to arrange things, so that you can tell me what you need to in person. I don't want anyone to string me along." I could but she is coming here next week and don't have the budget to go there.
soccerrprp Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 I sounds like you are talking. This sounds a little silly. You are talking, but can't talk about pressing issues? So, you are both saving that for face to face? If so, good.
Author vieillot Posted December 8, 2013 Author Posted December 8, 2013 I sounds like you are talking. This sounds a little silly. You are talking, but can't talk about pressing issues? So, you are both saving that for face to face? If so, good. We have talked about my over pressing attitude but It's not fixed. So it's kinda we are not pushing things until she come here
Author vieillot Posted December 11, 2013 Author Posted December 11, 2013 She is coming in next week. And she told me she could stay shorter than we planned because of our issues. Probably she thinks that issues won't be fine after she come here. We're gonna have a long talk after that it's blurry .Anything can happen but I feel she is more likely to break up. I hope and pray issues and our relationship will be fine and be happy like two weeks before.
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