Lennon Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 I don't want to give any of the plot details away to the movie. However this movie could help people who are all going through this nasty intensely painful losing your love crap. For those who have seen the movie. Who feels like they can really relate to Pat the protagonist of the movie. Clinging to hope, improving himself in the hope of getting his wife back, erratic behaviour (not so bad as the character in the movie though), constantly tormenting himself and placing the blame all on himself. I was watching it today with my mother and brother and brought up how my ex promised to contact me after she finished work a few days ago, its been three days now since she sent this email. My mum says your like "him" Pat the protagonist "stop torturing yourself Stephen". I actually do feel like I can relate to him alot, and if I let myself I could let myself sink to his depths of depression and pain but I'm fighting to make my life better. I'm moving to France to work for a year. I want a change in my life but I feel like I'm running away too, I can't live in the city I was with her anymore because its like i'm haunted by her and the memories we shared there. My breakup though had no cheating or betrayal involved, it was just a 180 on her part and completely blindsided me. Not having a proper answer or being able to understand what happened, is what is driving me up the wall. So who can relate to Pat? :]
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 Haven't seen it but will try & track it down .. At the moment I feel more like I relate to single white female & misery ha ha x
organizedchaos Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 I don't want to give any of the plot details away to the movie. However this movie could help people who are all going through this nasty intensely painful losing your love crap. For those who have seen the movie. Who feels like they can really relate to Pat the protagonist of the movie. Clinging to hope, improving himself in the hope of getting his wife back, erratic behaviour (not so bad as the character in the movie though), constantly tormenting himself and placing the blame all on himself. I was watching it today with my mother and brother and brought up how my ex promised to contact me after she finished work a few days ago, its been three days now since she sent this email. My mum says your like "him" Pat the protagonist "stop torturing yourself Stephen". I actually do feel like I can relate to him alot, and if I let myself I could let myself sink to his depths of depression and pain but I'm fighting to make my life better. I'm moving to France to work for a year. I want a change in my life but I feel like I'm running away too, I can't live in the city I was with her anymore because its like i'm haunted by her and the memories we shared there. My breakup though had no cheating or betrayal involved, it was just a 180 on her part and completely blindsided me. Not having a proper answer or being able to understand what happened, is what is driving me up the wall. So who can relate to Pat? :] Yep. And my bu was hard for same reasons as yours. No fighting or cheating. She just did a 180 and walked away.
yorkie Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 mine to was a 180 after an argument, and then she said she had been unhappy for some time. i do honestly believe its gigs, and also her now best friend who is single as her ex cheated on her. i think thats hard when you dont get answers or when you do the answer just change all the time. and it contradicts everything she said. it also makes you feel did you really ever know that person. anyhow i after 3 n half months am now on the mend i will always love her but i have met someone new! and i am taking it slow. i have been confused during the break up and now im just enjoying myself and its true learn to love yourself! everyne i know just says move on your a good guy its her loss, and i am starting well i am believing it now. yes its also hard as i have to have contact around the kids but its very Limited. but i am now starting to feel more happy in myself. keep thinking about you enjoying yourself. the best way i can describe it is being selfish! remember when you were being stubborn after an argument but you have to dig deep! believe she aint coming back and use your anger to not contact her, eventually you will start to believe it! and your anger does subside but you wont contact her. then if she does come back if she does dont hope for it, then you are in a rational place to decide. or you have moved on and can say no. good luck people! remember the fighting spirit! anyone can kick you when your down but they best watch out for when you get up! 2
MoveAlong Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 I've never seen the movie, but I'll check it out after my schedule clears up in a week. Sounds like I can relate though...my ex pretty much left me with no apparent reason. There was no fight...no argument. I suppose there was distance, but it definitely came as a shock. But yes, I was clinging to hope. I have no idea how I feel now...kind of just F*** you world, I've had enough. But yes, I have been pretty erratic, and self-blaming. I used to constantly check facebook like a coke addict. I also asked her friends how she was and whatever. I don't know. Part of me is unwilling to accept that someone can just get up and leave three years behind. But 6 weeks later, I suppose it's pretty real, and settling in. I suppose part of the reason of self-improvement is to win her back, but part of the reason is just to be better. 1. Build more self-confidence, and stay busy. A break up feels like a kick in the balls..except it's everyday. 2. Win her back...if not, at least be better than her, and find a new girl. 1
yorkie Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 I've never seen the movie, but I'll check it out after my schedule clears up in a week. Sounds like I can relate though...my ex pretty much left me with no apparent reason. There was no fight...no argument. I suppose there was distance, but it definitely came as a shock. But yes, I was clinging to hope. I have no idea how I feel now...kind of just F*** you world, I've had enough. But yes, I have been pretty erratic, and self-blaming. I used to constantly check facebook like a coke addict. I also asked her friends how she was and whatever. I don't know. Part of me is unwilling to accept that someone can just get up and leave three years behind. But 6 weeks later, I suppose it's pretty real, and settling in. I suppose part of the reason of self-improvement is to win her back, but part of the reason is just to be better. 1. Build more self-confidence, and stay busy. A break up feels like a kick in the balls..except it's everyday. 2. Win her back...if not, at least be better than her, and find a new girl. i felt like that only yesterday morning! but you know what yes i will have bad days but its clicked in my head! im very lucky that i kept the house and the kids, and you know what my ex is a very brave woman! doing what she is doing! i still think there must be someone else in the back round but her parents say they cant see any sign of it and also she has still said 3 n half months on that there is no one else, even though she did say she has been asked out last week, and that since i am dating she said she should which sounds tit for tat. but yeah it hurts but do it for yourself you need to give up all hope of her returning and i have accepted it. yes its hard i still have photos up and she looked and was so happy in them pics which is hard but hey life really does move on! she is still very angry with me and we cant even talk alot of our communication about the kids is by text. now that shows she is angry with me i dont know why as she was the one that left yes i constantly asked for questions and answers but now i aint bothered. she walked i stayed and i am moving on faster than her tbh, not that its a race and i really hope she finds someone nice for her sake because i was and i do believe the best thing for her. and im lucky i have been getting alot of attention from the ladies, and when i ask why they like me its because im a nice and good guy. so get yourselves out when your ready and date. the first few dates and the first few times you have sex will be tough but it helps you move on. i remember i pulled a lass on a night out, after i had sex i cried for 2 hours i hated it, she was fit as well but i felt like i had cheated but you know what i didnt i was single and needed to snap out of the relationship in my head. i played the dating game and found it hard but my confidence grew. i got alot of compliments even about my looks lol where i think im a shrek lookalike but im not green lol. anyway turns out i had 3 woman chasing me and i thought what the hell. one of them i really liked so i started dating her been 3 weeks now and i feel great, yes i miss the ex but i dont dwell on her now she made her decision and i am moving onwards and upwards! her loss end of the day! i was and did my best and i can hold my head up high and the kids are happy and doing well.
MoveAlong Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 Nice, it sounds like you are really getting everything together. I'm on my way. I guess some casual encounters with women would help...but I have too many things to worry about right now. Unfortunately, I'm extremely busy for a bit longer. It'd be nice if I had free time to just go out with friends, but I have far too much work to do for another 2 weeks. I'll start by getting into fighting shape. How do you get yourself to give up all hope? Was this part in the movie? lol
yorkie Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 i havent watched the movie but i will, its sounds interesting and tbh i dont want hope sneaking up on me! so anything else to help me i will do. you say your busy but how about online dating get yourself a profile made up and thats hard as you have to talk good about yourself! see if anyone is intrested i change my online dating profile about 6/7 times lol. and please dont get me wrong i might have a few more bad days im sure i will as 12n half years and to say im over her in 3 n half months no not completely. i will always love her but having her back no way! hopefully one day we can be on good terms for the kids but thats it. yeah it does still make me sick if i find out she is dating but hey, its not about her anymore its about you! she has gone it was her choice so you have to move on whilst she will always laugh at you and her ego will be massive she will joke with friends and her new relationship or relationships that she did that to you. so move on! dumpers can be very cruel! ime
MoooOinkBaaa Posted December 8, 2013 Posted December 8, 2013 Cool I have this movie, been meaning to watch it. I haven't watched a movie alone yet, I used to share them with my ex so it's hard. I'll watch it, can't beat Bradley Cooper
Sugarkane Posted December 9, 2013 Posted December 9, 2013 I had mixed feelings about this movie. Some things really annoyed me. Eg that Pat falling in love again, would somehow fix his bipolar. Not realistic.
Haydn Posted December 9, 2013 Posted December 9, 2013 True i tend to agree with you. If Pat reminded me of anyone it was my ex! Feel good movie at the end. There is a book as well i heard. I prefer it when Bradleys blowing things up or the Hangover movies. I had mixed feelings about this movie. Some things really annoyed me. Eg that Pat falling in love again, would somehow fix his bipolar. Not realistic.
Author Lennon Posted December 9, 2013 Author Posted December 9, 2013 I had mixed feelings about this movie. Some things really annoyed me. Eg that Pat falling in love again, would somehow fix his bipolar. Not realistic. When are movies ever really realistic Sugarkane, :] Its like my father watching the hangover II during the car chase scene and the car goes flying over a canal and landing on the other side. "Look at that, none of them wearing seatbelts, thats showing good road safety isn't it" haha, the hangover II, drug dealing monkey, alot of insane **** happening throughout the movie, yet my dad is concerned about them not wearing seatbelts whilst in the midst of an inane car chase.
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