We never really even dated, but he was my first everything. I thought he'd be my last

[SameOldFear]

Sorry for the novel but I really need help.

Hi, I just have to get this all off my chest because it hurts so bad. I'm 18 years old and last year I met a boy who was also 18, we went to two different schools but we met through mutual friends. He was really shy and really quiet, and our three mutual friends were his only friends. We asked him to hang out with us a lot and such and he always would, but me and him grew really close. Through hanging out with us he got a lot more friends and a lot more confidence, but he still wasn't an extrovert, in May, I confessed my feelings and he told me he had felt the same way for a long time.

We dated, but only for a couple of days, because he said he had been a loner for so long he wasn't even used to hanging out with people, let alone, dating. I understood completely. He said he would work on it for me and that he still loved me. We were basically dating. We went places together, I got him a job with me, we had a really intimate physical relationship and he told me he loved me and I was the only one for him and he would never leave and he would continue to work on his internal struggles for me over the summer. Well school started, and he met a girl (who was living with one of the three mutual friends). The girl had a boyfriend and it was no big deal, but then she told the mutual friend she liked him, but she knew it would never work. But then the girl broke up with her boyfriend and asked for his number. I asked him about it and he said he barely even knew her, so I didn't worry about it.

Just 6 days later, I didn't hear from him all weekend, and I got a little worried. My mutual friend called me and told me that the girl had told him she liked him and he reciprocated the feelings. My heart tore in half. I have never been so hurt. So, I saw him that day and I confronted him about it, he said he was sorry and he knew he was a bad friend. Then he started crying and telling me how sorry he was for being such a bad friend. I told him it would be okay and he could still fix things but he kept crying and he told me he was ashamed for me to see him like that. So, I left and the next day I found out they started dating. And now it's been two months and girl got kicked out of the friend's house and is living with him. I'm so broken by this still. I just don't understand. I gave him everything I had, I waited for him. He couldn't even date me, and now he's known her for a three months and their living together? This was my worst nightmare and all of my worst fears and it all happened. Someone please say something, it hurts so bad. Any advice will help.

Edited December 8, 2013 by SameOldFear

[jessiej]

Hello, first off, i'm sorry for what you're going through. I know how bad heartbreak hurts. I just lost my relationship of 3 years to my first love. I am also 18.

 

It hurts like hell, I know. But honestly, everything gets better in time and I promise you that from the bottom of my heart, things will improve. Just focus on the positive. I know how easy it is to just lay in bed and cry and get depressed over it but it's not worth it!

 

Just like you, my ex was my first love, first EVERYTHING, and I also believed it would last forever. That's the magic of your first love, the ignorance that it can never end.

 

We are so young though!! We have our whole lives ahead of us! If this man treated you like this, he's not worth it honestly. You have your whole life to find someone better! You are one heartbreak closer to being with your soulmate. Which is so cliche, and I know really doesn't help at the moment, but it is so true!

 

Just focus on the positive. Do all the things you love to do, hangout with the people who love you and make you happy! Don't dwell on the past, it does you no good, you can only go forward! So go forward, and figure out what you want to do now that will make you happy