Dimension7 Posted December 7, 2013 Posted December 7, 2013 This is a long story. I met this girl in August. She, 26yo (I'm 22), was just ending a one year relationship, a troubled one, where the guy was constantly changing his mood towards her. When she met me, she was ready to have fun, but not to have something serious again. The problem is that we instantly built an immense chemistry and, after just 2/3 weeks, we started seeing each other day in day out, having great sex and just behaving like we're the best lovers. In the first two months, until around mid-October, she was always saying that it was nothing serious, but we both felt that the thing was growing. By November, she started to adopt some typical girlfriend behaviors, even making plans for the future, presenting me to her family and saying to her closest friends how great I am - and she is the kind of girl who doesn't like to talk about her relationships to almost anyone. No facebook status, no photos. She is very cautious about her privacy. Two weeks ago, we spent a whole week in London - our favourite city. It was an awesome time and she was basically expecting me to take the serious step and asking her to be in an official relationship. On the first night, she said "I love you". So I took that step. She said YES, three months after everything started. Back to our homeland, four days after, she called me and said the she needed to rethink her decision. I got mad, I felt cheated. She added that she wasn't ready to let sink the fact that she has someone's girlfriend again. We talked about this the next day, in person, I got mad again, I left the place where we were and she ran after me, crying, saying that she needs me badly, that she feels that I love her and she loves me back. But, somehow, she is still confused about everything. I don't know what to do. Basically, we're back to the phase that we were before going to London, but I feel a bit like ****. I feel insecure as hell and, although I feel that she really likes me - sometimes almost as an obsession - I also sense that we might never take this to the next step. Also, her last boyfriend quite limited her freedom, not giving her enough time to be with her friends - and she is the kind of person that loves to be with friends, much more than family. I feel that she thinks I'll do the same as he did, no matter how much I try to prove the opposite. She compliments me so much: says that I'm unreal, that I'm the greatest sex she ever had, that she adores me and wants me only for her. That she fears I might runaway with all her craziness, insecurities and inner troubles. Asks me to have patience. I have patience, but this is driving me mad. I feel like we're actually in a relationship, but, at the same time, she is not fully mine. Sorry for the long vent, but I really need to spit this thing out.
StanMusial Posted December 7, 2013 Posted December 7, 2013 Two weeks ago, we spent a whole week in London - our favourite city. It was an awesome time and she was basically expecting me to take the serious step and asking her to be in an official relationship. On the first night, she said "I love you". So I took that step. She said YES, three months after everything started. First of all, from YOUR side of the story, it appears you were in a bf/gf relationship with her regardless of any "official" designation. I bolded the above because it is a curious turn of phrase. Why do you presume she was expecting you to take some sort of action to make your relationship "official"?
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