mikespyder69 Posted December 7, 2013 Posted December 7, 2013 Hello there I'm new to this Forum and would like to introduce myself. I'm a 30 year old Single father who divorced 5 years ago. I've been dating casually here and there in the last three years. Went through a lot of pointless dates that ended up as one night stands; or no repeat date. Now here's the story *Might want to grab a drink or a bite to eat it might be long* About a month ago a new girl started at the company that I work at. She was very attractive and I did want to get to know her better. Knowing that I organized a small get together with some guys from work... Just to find out if anyone was interested in her (Yeah I know sneaky eh? lol). Anyway low and behold someone invited this girl to the get together; Big win for me Anyway as the night progressed we all got to know each other I found out she has a son also so that peaked my interest as well. I ended up switching seats with the guy who invited her and sat right next to her. We talked more intimately and even flirted a little. We were all getting ready to leave, when i noticed she had a little too much to drink. So I stepped up as a gentleman and took her keys from her and drove her home. (I actually left my car but that's not important) I got her to her place, parked and sat there talking for a bit. She invited me in for wine, so I followed her in and she showed me her place. We had a couple glasses of wine and talked for a good while. She told me about her son and how he's the most wonderful person in her life, and that he gives her strength when the days seem long and tedious. After what seems like a few minutes was actually a few hours. I noticed we were out of Cigarettes so I said I'll go to the store and pick up a pack. She said she'll come with me and then we get our things and walk down the street. Only when we get there we see the store is closed. She tells me there's a gas station not too far and they're open 24hrs. We head back the way we came; just right in front of her house she stops me, and whispers "I don't want rumors about this" (Because we both work for the same company) and she kisses me. Not a small peck, but a full blown kiss right there in the middle of the street. (^_^) She then tells me she's gonna go in and tells me where the gas station is. Needless to say I ran like a lightning bolt hit my ass and got back to her ASAP. After a cigarette, we started making out for a good while hot and heavy (no sex though). Then we both looked at the time and then saw that we had only 4 hours left before we had to go into work. We stop there and go to sleep; cuddled. We awake to our alarms blaring ( we hit the snooze a couple of times), We slowly get up and start making out again. We got hot and heavy but never actually sealed the deal. We grab a cup of coffee she drives us back to work. She gives me her number and tells me after one last kiss to call sometime this week (^_^). I do call her a couple of days later, we chat it up and I ask her out on a date that Friday. We set up the time and after a few minutes of chatting we hang up. Friday arrives and that evening I pick her up, we have dinner and few drinks. After dinner she tells me her sister's in town and wants to spend time with her. I take it she wants to end the date a little early so I drive her home I park and then she gives me this look... (I know those eyes, I've seen them on my ex:wife) She begins to tell me that she just got out of a serious relationship and that she's not ready... (Yeah I know right (*_*) ) Suffice it to say I was devastated. So she kissed me on the cheek and got out of my car. In my head I was thinking, Why me?! For a whole week we didn't really talk, we just text each other here and there nothing really significant. But then one night she calls me @ 5 am I was a little unsure what was going on, but she told me she just had it out with her Ex and was trembling. I told her I'll be right there and when I got there, She explained what happened, an argument broke out and well he had to be hauled off. I spent the night, I held her close to help her relax. The next day I go home after I'm reassured she's okay. The next day she texts me thanking me for being there when she felt truly alone. I told her if she ever needs to talk, i'm just phone call away. She says I'm amazing for being there for her; she also tells me She's sorry for not being ready, and tells me when she is ready that I'm the first person she plans to see. The following Sunday is the Annual Christmas party and we meet each other there, we have a great time and at the end I walk her to her car and kiss her on the cheek goodnight. *I swear it's not much longer now, I'm getting to my point:p* The next night she texts me, asking me if I would like to come over after work. I agree so as soon I finish I head on over to her place, We end up talking and I see she's had a few glasses of wine. She sits next to on the couch we flirt and she asks me "Why me? Why are you going for me?" I answer her (Sorry this line is mine not gonna put it here lol) anyway we start making out again, this time a lot hotter and lot heavier then last time... But no sex again (Blue balls). We fall asleep in her bed again, and cuddled as usual. In the morning I had to wake up early in order to get back to my place to bring my son to school. I tell maybe I should back tonight to keep her company, she smiles and says that'd be great. I actually didn't have to work that day, but she did she tells me she'll text me when she's going to have lunch. I tell her I'll be there and we do so, I grab her a coffee and croissants at TH and proceed to the lounge. We sit across each other and talk and chat with everyone there. After that we go out for a smoke and as we smoke and talk, I casually mention that we agreed for me to come over tonight, but she says No no not tonight I'm so sleepy I could pass out. It's true we didn't get much sleep that night. I ask her out on another date (Tonight actually) Anyway here's where I need advice, I've been talking to a lot of people. And also surfing the web for advice (Hey, that's how I found this place (^_^) ). I'm getting mixed advice, not sure what I should do 50% of people tell me she's stringing me along but the other 50% tell me she's really just not ready. Honestly I don't know what to do here, I really like her, I think we would be awesome together, but I have this feeling I'm being used somehow... I'd appreciate any type of advice on this matter, I know I'm new here But I've never been this confused. Just like my Title says "What do you guys think?":o lol Thanks for reading mikespyder69
Shepp Posted December 7, 2013 Posted December 7, 2013 That was a lot of reading!! Err, I could write a lot here but I won't for now, im not really sure if my experience is relevant or not. All i'll say is ive been in that kind of.....I want you/I cant do this/I want you again dynamic. I think the length f time you hang on is dependant on the girl - she says shes not ready, valid or not valid? Do you believe her. If you do then times your friend, if you don't then that's your gut telling you she's stringing you along. Only you know her so only you can decide if you believe her.
jeremy2125 Posted December 7, 2013 Posted December 7, 2013 Iv'e had a similar experience happen to be except it's college not the workplace. Unfortunately my story didn't end up as a happy ending. I was the guy being strung along, probably because I paid too much attention to her. Either way if it is taking weeks and she still biding her time on a decision you might want to have a talk with her.
Author mikespyder69 Posted December 9, 2013 Author Posted December 9, 2013 That was a lot of reading!! Err, I could write a lot here but I won't for now, im not really sure if my experience is relevant or not. All i'll say is ive been in that kind of.....I want you/I cant do this/I want you again dynamic. I think the length f time you hang on is dependant on the girl - she says shes not ready, valid or not valid? Do you believe her. If you do then times your friend, if you don't then that's your gut telling you she's stringing you along. Only you know her so only you can decide if you believe her. Thanks for the reply and you're right... I just wish there was an easier way of finding out, without investing too much time into it.
Author mikespyder69 Posted December 9, 2013 Author Posted December 9, 2013 Iv'e had a similar experience happen to be except it's college not the workplace. Unfortunately my story didn't end up as a happy ending. I was the guy being strung along, probably because I paid too much attention to her. Either way if it is taking weeks and she still biding her time on a decision you might want to have a talk with her. I'm sorry to hear that... I've never experienced that before, but I now have this sinking feeling that I may be experiencing my first:confused:
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