crimsoncurrent Posted December 6, 2013 Posted December 6, 2013 Well, it's been such a long journey for me. I joined LS back in Jan last year. After a nearly four year relationship ended, I maintained NC for 10 months. I've been able to change so much since the time. Because I was able to maintain NC for so long, I learned a lot about impulse-control, becoming more self-disciplined. To illustrate how dedicated I was to NC, when I broke NC two months ago, I just discovered that my ex had been dating someone else just two weeks after our breakup. If it wasn't for NC, and I found out that information back then, I feel like it might've destroyed me. It was difficult as is just separating from her life. Now, on Dec 22, it'll be a year since the last time I saw her. At first, I wanted to commemorate the day by texting her, telling her how much I've missed her, but after finding out about what really happened, how she really wanted to be with someone else, I'm not considering that anymore. Instead, I'll think how much I was able to change since then, making changes that will remain for the rest of my life. It's sometimes is difficult to deal with the feelings of abandonment, and at times I do become angry with how she just left me for someone else, but I think that's normal. I still have some healing to do with getting over her completely, but I've made a lot of progress. So, for those who are thinking about breaking NC, especially during the early stages of the breakup, don't do it! It's not worth it. I honestly think NC saved my life. After I broke NC, and a couple of more times of checking her fb, wanting to cement what really happened, I've been clean since then. I wish you all the best during the holiday season, especially if you're going through a difficult breakup as I did during this time last year. 6
cavalier99 Posted December 6, 2013 Posted December 6, 2013 Your awesome man!!! Really glad to hear how your doing. Great job. Soon youll be super super happy being single and most likley a new RS will be right around the corner if you want one. They tend to seek you out once recovered. Really try to enjoy this time. Go out. Hook up with girls ecetera. It is so nice to be able to do this wit:hout a gloomy EX cloud over your head! Rock on! Cav 2
Author crimsoncurrent Posted December 6, 2013 Author Posted December 6, 2013 Thanks, man! I remember gathering a lot of inspiration from your situation. You were about two months ahead of me in the process. Glad to hear you're doing well too! But yeah, the single life is great. I've been able to meet new people, make new friends, and yes, hook up with other girls. ha. It's funny now. For such a long time, I imagined and re-imagined, pretty much obsessively, about my ex and I having this dramatic reunion, but after finding out what really happened, I would be so pissed if she even considered such a thing. But yeah, I'm sure the angry will subside, but I'll rather be angry at her than be consumed with far-fetched fantasies of us getting back to together. 4
cavalier99 Posted December 6, 2013 Posted December 6, 2013 Good for you. Soon the anger will be gone also. Indifferece. Glad to hear your going out. This will speed up the process. I remeber being able to be truly interested in other girls and that is when i knew that it was done. The ex had no hold on me at all. Your right there! Cav 1
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