Shotputter Posted December 6, 2013 Posted December 6, 2013 So i'm a freshman in college currently. I met this girl who is on the track team and throws javelin with me. The chemistry was there and we started "talking" We've been texting for 2 weeks or so and we've spent many nights (7+) sitting in her room watching movies, talking, cuddling, kissing. Things have been going decently well. Last Sunday she admitted to something a little alarming. Before we had kissed or done anything really, she had this 24 year old kid (im 18, shes 20) that works with her (shes a residential advisor) over and they had done some **** such as making out. This was before we had done anything physical and apparantley they have known each other for about 2 months and he hasn't made a move due to baggage with past GFs of his. Now he says that hes in love with her. That shes in love with him and he had even dropped roses and a love letter off in her room. I've never once raised my voice, acted in any way but completely nice and understanding to this girl. But shes very unsure about who shes going to choose. I told her that i'm not just gonna be her punching bag and wait around for her to make a decision. She told me on Tuesday that she was picking me and it was over. Just a few hours ago i discovered the roses and the letter happened and now shes in the same predicament trying to choose again. I really like this girl and she's an extremely nice, and respectable woman. The kid is a little crazy, paranoid, and torn up. I talked to him today for about 30 minutes about this whole situation and he sounded pathetic. I was obviously nice to him but it sickened me a bit to listen to his ****. What do you guys think? Is this girl worth it? It hasn't been going on for that long but shes really hurting me with this.
crederer Posted December 6, 2013 Posted December 6, 2013 I think you shouldn't ever have to be someones second choice. It seems that's what you are. You said yourself that this guy sounds a bit pathetic. I don't doubt that at all. However, she's considering you or him. The fact that she's even considering this "pathetic" guy says something, IMO. You're young man. Keep your chin up.
Vogeltron Posted December 6, 2013 Posted December 6, 2013 (edited) I will say now that I am in my mid 20's. Most women that age are more interested in men. Not so much 24 in general but guys who semi have there **** together. It really does depend on how you feel about this girl. It is a big free world out there and lots and lots of women. But if you really feel strongly about this girl. This is where you need to reach down grab your balls and pull out your man card. Being 18 trying to go after a 20 year old is harder at that age. I will say. But if you really and I mean really like this girl. I would surprise her with something. Tell her you are the most gorgeous woman I have ever met, you think the world of her and if she isn't interested then so be it. You will survive and move onto bigger and "better" things. I really can not stress this enough. It took me a until I was about 22-23 to realize this. But it really is a big free freaking world out there. No reason to get caught up over anything. Do not confine yourself to a box. If you see something you like go talk to them, even if you have to be a jerk about it. One of the best things I learned in life is if you see something in life you might have to go take it. For myself and anyone else. It always comes down to how bad do you want it and what are going to do to achieve it? Edited December 6, 2013 by Vogeltron
StanMusial Posted December 6, 2013 Posted December 6, 2013 At that age people will come and go into your life. I remember one of my college buddies got really tore up when some older guy snaked his gf. He acted pretty pathetic about it but he eventually moved on. When I was young, it was more important. Pain more painful, laughter more loud, yeah.
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