youngbutoldsoul Posted December 4, 2013 Posted December 4, 2013 I'm facing a really hard challenge. I've been NC for half a year. He technically initiated NC after dumping me (after 2 years of dating) and trying to friendzone me. I refused to be put in that situation so I respectfully declined it by explaining to him it couldn't work for me that way and that as much as I wanted to be with him, I have to move on with my life if that's his decision. He never responded to me back and we've been in NC since. Recently, there's been a situation involving money. My ex and I lived together last year in the same apartment with other roommates (note: they're all his friends and I am not friends with them). That apartment complex had some fees that they're charging us and I am responsible to help pay for some of it too. My ex NEVER contacted me. Instead, recently a friend of his (who was our roommate) contacted me asking me to contribute with the payment. I asked for the company/recipient contact info so I could send a check. He said my ex paid for it and we all need to pay my ex back..... How do you approach this? It'll be uncomfortable for my ex and I either way. I'm upset that he can't do something as simple as pick up the phone or text me to handle this financial situation. At the same time, I understand he either A) doesn't want to seem like a jerk and contact me JUST for money after ignoring me for 6 months and/or B) he simply doesn't want to talk to me so he's cowardly asking his friend to be the middleman and relay the message to me. Either way I just want to make the payment and so there's no reason we should ever be in touch again! What do I do? I don't want to just text and make small talk and ask him how his thanksgiving was JUST to eventually get to the main point which revolves money....... Any suggestions would be appreciated!!!!!
d0nnivain Posted December 4, 2013 Posted December 4, 2013 If all of these people were your roommates it shouldn't matter who contacts you about the financial obligation & there was no reason for your EX to do it. It's kind of stupid that since your EX paid he didn't call you but he didn't call you. If the guy who did call you is willing to get you the info you want (proof of payment by the EX & a break down of your share) just let that person play middleman & move on.
melodymatters Posted December 4, 2013 Posted December 4, 2013 I think what the ex did was kind off lame. If they ( he and roommates) were really that concerned about losing a hundred bucks or so, then he should have had the roommate contact her THEN. HE made the decision to pay it, then because he obviously wants no contact with the OP but is UNWILLING to eat her share, he has one of the other roomies call and ask for money with NO receipt/proof or professional contact number ? I am NOT giving my ex's friend five cents out of the blue, unless it was discussed before hand that " when we leave, we all have to pay $100 towards a cleaning fee" and I knew that going in. OP, my advice for what it is worth is to KEEP UP NO CONTACT by all means, and if you can afford it, give the "extra fee" money to the roommate and forget any of them ever existed. If you can NOT afford it, stick to your guns and say you would like to contact the manager of the property ( I was one once) to know A) what the settlement fee was and B) was it paid. If so, figure out your portion and give it to the roomate MAKING SURE YOU GET A RECEIPT. Personally I would never dump someone and then quibble over what sounds like a small sum of money but perhaps your ex was a small person, and it would be better to get rid of him in each and every way including this last little penny pinching tie.
elbe Posted December 4, 2013 Posted December 4, 2013 (edited) Just send him a check what's the big deal? Edit: What is so very complex about this? Edited December 4, 2013 by elbe edit
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