ABrokenNerd Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 Alright.... not that anyone asked or cares all that much, but I am a guy and I am ashamed to admit that since the breakup (about a year ago) I have not had any sex at all. For starters, I haven't really played the field seriously yet, and I haven't moved on completely yet (check my threads if you want the full story. First thread I ever made has it). Within the thoughts and memories of my ex, the sexual ones come to mind from time to time and those hurt now, and they pop up from time to time and it just sucks. I'm not the promiscuous type because in my opinion I just feel that having empty sex with strangers would just make me feel more empty. Also this goes without saying but going from having a partner, to well.... yanking your own giggle stick, is like going from Coke to RC Cola. Believe me when I say that sex isn't the main driving force in my relationships, but the fact that I haven''t had it in awhile makes me realize how much I miss it . Is there any strategies to cope with this that doesn't involve the obvious quick fixes?
OpheliaSong Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 If you figure it out, please let me know because I miss the intimacy too though I have only been broken up for two weeks. I miss feeling full if you know what I mean and toys just aren't the same.
Braveheart01 Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 I wish we have subscribe button in this forum. I'm having this problem too. I can't stop thinking about her doing it with another guy.
radiodarcy Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 If you figure it out, please let me know because I miss the intimacy too though I have only been broken up for two weeks. I miss feeling full if you know what I mean and toys just aren't the same. Same here There was a guy I met online. We hooked up a few times. But it was strictly sex. No emotion on his end or mine. I mean - - it was better than a toy. But not by much. I actually wound up feeling even emptier and more alone
organizedchaos Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 I wish we have subscribe button in this forum. I'm having this problem too. I can't stop thinking about her doing it with another guy. In the menu above the first post is a "Thread Tools" button. Hover over it and click "subscribe" Then at the very top you see a "Quick Links" option. From there you can view "subscribed threads"
TylerDurdenn Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 For four years we had the most awesome sex life, 3 times a day at least and always very rough and dirty. Now nothing. She has text me a few times telling me how much she wants sex with me but says she can't do it. Porn does nothing for me So yeah sorry no solution
todreaminblue Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 lol......ahem....never heard of a giggle stick and rc cola.....thats cool.....not so nerdy ....rock on.... dont worry about sex ....hold your values live yoru life.......when it happens it happens naturally and the last person you were so enamoured with sexually fades......and your love life becomes about the person you are with.,..........trust me.......cheers....deb 1
Vinsanity1307 Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 Hey man I am there with you. I am only 5 months post BU, and feel the same way. I never had sex with someone unless I was in a relationship with them. Empty sex doesnt phase me. The emotyional, and connection what make it. I dont believe in using someone to get off. I value what I got and who gets it if that makes sense...Just how I am. The thoughts that i dont have that awesome connection with my ex is horrid. So I am there with you man. No solution though
mutualove Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 You're ashamed?!?Where's the shame in that??Boy this society is going downhill... 1
sun1972 Posted December 3, 2013 Posted December 3, 2013 its been 3 weeks for me, and im struggling for sure... god reading this has depressed me..
seekingpeaceinlove Posted December 4, 2013 Posted December 4, 2013 I am 3.5 post BU with no intimacy since then. Before my ex I had no problem having casual relations with FWBs...but now...I have no interest in that whatsoever. My ex was the best I've ever had.. I can't imagine going a year without sex but at the same time I think I'll feel empty if it's not with someone I'm involved with...ugh.
Author ABrokenNerd Posted December 4, 2013 Author Posted December 4, 2013 Perhaps we can all find solace in the fact that we don't suffer alone...
Phoe Posted December 4, 2013 Posted December 4, 2013 No sex for about 9 months now, and was 2 years without before that. I find the only thing that kills the desire is to completely cut off my sexual side. No masturbating as that only makes it worse. If I can manage several weeks without masturbating my sex drive kinda starts hibernating, but once I masturbate again I've screwed all that up and want it even more. Time is the only thing that helps the desire fade.
Sleepyhead Posted December 4, 2013 Posted December 4, 2013 It really sucks. I'm not even a particularly sexual person, I just miss the intimacy and making my partner happy. The hook-ups I've had since then just make me feel worse; unless we're in love I feel like it's just using one another. You're not alone. 1
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