vanhalenfan Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 This is mainly for those of you who are a bit older (35-45+) in relationships. I am curious to know how often you keep in touch throughout the day with your SO? I am divorced and into the dating world again. I am with someone right now, and we are exclusive. He is a bit older than I am, which I am fine with as it's something I've always leaned towards (12 year age difference). Thing is, I notice some dynamics are a little bit different than what I remember when I was dating way back when before I was married - Early 20's. It seemed like the people I dated then, around that age, seemed to be more "in contact" throughout the day...Texting, calling, etc. With this man I with now (he is 45), it seems we could go most of the day before contacting each other in some form (call, text). I am into those good morning texts or at least having some kind of morning/noon contact, it's more him that can seem to get lost in work or just want to get on with his day and will contact me later. If I call or text, he'll answer without an issue, or sometimes take awhile to get back to me, but he'll only initiate contact with a specific purpose if it's say, before 3pm (like if he needs to ask me something). Doesn't seem to want to ask how's it going unless he knows I wasn't feeling well the night before or have something big going on that morning or something which happens on occasion. Now that I am writing this out, it seems pretty normal for an older person in a relationship. I suppose it can seem rather immature to be all over one another with texts throughout the day, etc. The way it is going right now, it doesn't bother me so much, but some days I do prefer a little more contact. Any insight? Normal?
d0nnivain Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 No matter my age, I rarely wanted daily contact with an SO until we go to the point of living together or being engaged but I'm odd that way. In the beginning, I feel smothered easily
NTRDR Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 I think it's normal, I don't like getting texts all day long especially if I"m having a busy day. IF it's someone special I do like a morning text just to say morning, or a text during the day to say they're thinking about me AND NOTHING ELSE. So I would say pretty much NORMAL, as I don't shoot off texts before my work day is done, and do all my personal calling while driving home.
GemmaUK Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 I'm in teh same age group as your SO and I would welcome less texts. The last man I dated (just a couple of years younger than me) was ncessant with texting and there was just nothing at all to talk about after a short while. It was the same with the guy before him several years back too actually. I prefer to contact someone to arrange something rather than just keep sending inane messages and I don't feel any need to be in touch all the time myself. Plus I'm busy and work long hours so don't like being tied to my phone and being at fault for missing a text about what he had for lunch. I did compromise on it but still found myself getting a bit bored It gives me a chance to miss them when I don't hear from them. Contact every couple of days or so is good with me. If it's not for you though you should say something.
BikerAccnt Posted December 2, 2013 Posted December 2, 2013 I'm 53, and for me personally, less is more. I don't need daily contact with someone I'm dating, not even with someone I'm exclusive with. Unless we are living in the same house, I don't really feel it's necessary. Now, if it's something my date/gf likes, then I'm fine with it, to a point. I do like to speak a few times during the week, but seriously, I don't need to know the in and out's of your daily life. If there's a problem, or something emotionally that's bugging you, then by all means call me. But, if it's to just say hi, and we just did that yesterday....
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