Dziggy55 Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 About a month ago my ex told me that she wanted a break from our relationship. She told me that her feelings weren't as strong as they once were for me and she wanted to figure some things out. Though I didn't want to, I agreed and told her to get in touch when she was ready to talk to me again. I know the best thing would be to go NC at that point, but we go to school together and NC is impossible. The next couple weeks, she seemed a lot happier than she was than she was when was with me. She was laughing and joking around with all our friends, but only when I was not around. When I was around she just became quiet and didn't talk at all, yet she still decided to sit in the seat right next to mine everyday while we ate lunch. This left me very confused. So three and a half weeks went by and I couldn't take it anymore and asked if she wanted to talk about us and she agreed. I went over to her house and we talked for about an hour. She told me that she still loved and cared about me, but did not want to be with me anymore. When I asked if she was happier without me, she told be that she was actually very sad and that she has had some rather serious family problems lately and started to bawl her eyes out. When she was done crying she said she wanted to be friends. I told her that I didn't know if I could do that and then left. She gave me a hug on the way out. When I went to pull away she lingered and didn't let go for over a minute. I saw her the next day and then she went back to being silent when I around. When I left the lunch table just for a minute she began talking and was laughing when I was on my way back, but when I got back, she went right back to silence. She did respond to be when I wished her a happy Thanksgiving but we haven't made any contact since. So basically I am very confused about what she is thinking. From what I hear from our friends she avoids mentioning me at all. Has she moved on? And does she really care about me or does she just not want to feel guilty for breaking my heart? I know it's impossible to actually know what she is thinking. I just want to know if anybody has any ideas.
Meadowgreen Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 About a month ago my ex told me that she wanted a break from our relationship. She told me that her feelings weren't as strong as they once were for me and she wanted to figure some things out. Though I didn't want to, I agreed and told her to get in touch when she was ready to talk to me again. I know the best thing would be to go NC at that point, but we go to school together and NC is impossible. The next couple weeks, she seemed a lot happier than she was than she was when was with me. She was laughing and joking around with all our friends, but only when I was not around. When I was around she just became quiet and didn't talk at all, yet she still decided to sit in the seat right next to mine everyday while we ate lunch. This left me very confused. So three and a half weeks went by and I couldn't take it anymore and asked if she wanted to talk about us and she agreed. I went over to her house and we talked for about an hour. She told me that she still loved and cared about me, but did not want to be with me anymore. When I asked if she was happier without me, she told be that she was actually very sad and that she has had some rather serious family problems lately and started to bawl her eyes out. When she was done crying she said she wanted to be friends. I told her that I didn't know if I could do that and then left. She gave me a hug on the way out. When I went to pull away she lingered and didn't let go for over a minute. I saw her the next day and then she went back to being silent when I around. When I left the lunch table just for a minute she began talking and was laughing when I was on my way back, but when I got back, she went right back to silence. She did respond to be when I wished her a happy Thanksgiving but we haven't made any contact since. So basically I am very confused about what she is thinking. From what I hear from our friends she avoids mentioning me at all. Has she moved on? And does she really care about me or does she just not want to feel guilty for breaking my heart? I know it's impossible to actually know what she is thinking. I just want to know if anybody has any ideas. Wow, this is such an awkward situation. She's being very unfair to you, hugging you like that and treating you with such indifference when you're around. Do you really need to sit next to her at lunch? Is there nowhere else you can go? She's told you plainly that she's not in love with you anymore, and you should take her word for it. Family issues or not, she has tossed you aside like trash, and you should pay her in kind by establishing as much distance between you as possible. You're not her emotional punching bag, ok? NC may not be an option until your studies are done, but Limited Contact is. If you carry on down this path you're going to feel destroyed in every way. Don't do that to yourself! 1
Author Dziggy55 Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 As far as the sitting at lunch thing, I really don't have anywhere else to go. I have a rather small circle of friends at school and we all sit together. In fact the only reason she sat there in the first place was because we were in a relationship when the school year began. Her best friend sits there as well and I am good friends with her as well. So it's sit there or eat alone. And I should probably have mentioned this before but I was told by a mutual that she had been thinking a lot about her boyfriend before me who passed away about a year ago. I was always there for her when since it happened and knew that it had happened before we got together. Could this have caused her to become depressed so much that she was having trouble being happy at all. And is it possible that her happy appearance is an act?
Shaine Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 She doesnt love you anymore. Or she doesnt love you as much as you love her. You deserve someone who will be totally inlove with you. Dont settle for less. Be with someone who wont just discard you like you dont matter to her. Be with womeone who will fight for you and will fight for the relationahip. 1
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