JustaRegularGuyZ Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 I've been truly happy and my heart has healed, though I didn't feel complete without writing this to her. "I am happy with the life I am given, with the opportunities that are out there for me, with the people I've met so far, and the ones that can not wait for my return; but I'd be a liar if I said I didn't miss you. You were a great friend to me, my best friend, and a lot of the memories will never be erased. I am happy that you were a chapter in my life and I will never let anybody judge you. I realized a lot with this trip and I'm not upset or angry anymore. I am truly happy and part of that happiness is that someone like you exists. "
TaraMaiden Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Sorry: *Sticks fingers down throat*. Bad idea. And you know it: hence the 'but' in the title. Not 'so', not 'and'.....'but'. You haven't 100% moved on: Moving on completely means 100% indifference. You don't care what she thinks about you. Now, essentially, you're holding out hope she will reply. Which will give you a warm glow, re-kindle what was dying down.... and make a mess of your emotions. Again. 3
Author JustaRegularGuyZ Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 Actually I could care less if she replies lol. In fact, I know she won't. I could care less of what she thinks of me too lol. What would be the point of getting back together, it would be horrible! No way!
TaraMaiden Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 so why send it? What made you care enough to give her the heads-up that, marvellous as you think she is, you're quite happy without her? What do you think it will do to her? What effect are you hoping for? 1
Author JustaRegularGuyZ Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 What made me care enough? She wrote me a while back asking if I'm still alive and well. What it'll do to her? I don't think she feels anything, so not much. What effect? Making it less awkward for when we'll bump into each other.
TaraMaiden Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 What made me care enough? She wrote me a while back asking if I'm still alive and well. What does she care? Allshe wanted to know was whether she could still jingle your bell.... What it'll do to her? I don't think she feels anything, so not much. Exactly. Which is why No Contact is the best option. Leave her guessing, what's the point? Who cares? What effect? Making it less awkward for when we'll bump into each other. Awkwardness is a self-generated state stemming from extant feelings not worked out. It's the person who cares the least, who controls the most. Right now, between you both, who of the two do you suppose that is?
Author JustaRegularGuyZ Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 Nah, you are right. Why am I wasting my time, energy, and patience on this person? Everything going well, then I had a moment of weakness and wrote stupid crap to her. What's the point? I have girls running after me and i'm showing my kindness to this half a person. **** Her. 1
Meadowgreen Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Nah, you are right. Why am I wasting my time, energy, and patience on this person? Everything going well, then I had a moment of weakness and wrote stupid crap to her. What's the point? I have girls running after me and i'm showing my kindness to this half a person. **** Her. Dude I'm so glad you changed your mind. She's so not worth it and I think you would've massively regretted sending her such an ego-stroke. Ain't no amount of pretty prose could change her mind if she doesn't want to be with you. The best revenge is moving the **** on and becoming the best version of you. Once you get there, all that sentiment and regret you feel about her will fall off you like a dead skin, I promise.
Meadowgreen Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Problem is.... he DID send it. OMG really? I've just completely missed that. Awkward. Right seriously OP, forget this wench. I sent a stupid Dear John letter too when I NC'd someone recently, totally wish I didn't. Chalk this up to a life lesson and kill it dead.
AnyaNova Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 hi justaregularguyz, i'm deleting my reply, as i hadn't realized you actually sent the letter & don't care about her. j Perhaps that might have been a bit precipitous. Several times I broke NC thinking I was sure I was okay with no response, or any response at all whatever it would be. And I was sure of this for at least a day or two afterward. This is not to say that Z might not truly be in the place he says he is, he very well may. But it is way too easy to assume you are there when you aren't yet ready. And to be burned by it later and have a lack of response or a bad response set you way back. 2
BC1980 Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Perhaps that might have been a bit precipitous. Several times I broke NC thinking I was sure I was okay with no response, or any response at all whatever it would be. And I was sure of this for at least a day or two afterward. This is not to say that Z might not truly be in the place he says he is, he very well may. But it is way too easy to assume you are there when you aren't yet ready. And to be burned by it later and have a lack of response or a bad response set you way back. I did the same. I broke NC after 3 months and felt terrible afterwards. I really thought I would be okay before making that call. It just goes to show that you should stay away from an ex, probably forever for most people.
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