Six months, a reflection

[Trick1004]

It hurts, it’s hell coming home from work and your ex tells out of the blue she wants to move out and “loves you but isn’t in love with you anymore (or any variation of this)” . Yep, you’re floored, your heart has been ripped out, smashed and discarded .

 

Worst pain I’ve ever felt. Six months later I’m beginning to appreciate the experience. I’ve been through **** before and have always been able to crawl myself out of it. So far in my life this has been the biggest hole of despair I’ve gotten out of.

 

All r/s are different but here are the things that got me where I’m at now.

 

1. Regardless of what you had with the ex the relationship is DONE. There is nothing you can do about it; begging gets you now where. Somehow I was able to avoid the begging part, don’t know why or how but DON’T do it.

 

2. Your emotions are going to be a mess. Don’t do a god damn thing based on your emotions. Listen to your rational BRAIN. It’s hard but that’s the only thing working right after a breakup. My ex wanted to meet up and talk for a few weeks after she ended it. My emotional part was all “**** ya we can patch this up”, all the while my brain was screaming at me not to do it. I listened to my brain.

 

3. You had a life before you got involved in a relationship with this person. I’ve used this extensively since the bu. The EX doesn’t define YOU. So go out there and re-discover what YOU are looking for.

 

4. Block everything, facebook, twitter, instagram ect…, You have to just do it. It’s hard to sever that connection; it took me a couple months until I blocked her. I wasn’t looking at her facebook page or anything, but her face kept turning up in my friends box. I just got tired of seeing her face so I blocked her. Just DO IT!

 

5. Contact – This is hard but unless its some serious ass **** about wanting to reconcile or provide some kind of closure, ignore everything. You might feel like an ass, but who the **** cares? You owe absolutely nothing to the ex when they decided to check out.

 

Bottom line; this person wanted you out of their life for whatever reason. You owe it to yourself to give them that and just vanish, disappear off the face of the earth and let them deal with it. Maybe you get some “Miss you” or “What’s up” texts ignore it all and keep working on yourself. All this is hard to see initially, but stick with it and you’ll be glad you did.

 

Happy holidays and keep moving on!

 

Trick

[cavalier99]

Youve got this nailed down!! Great job. Cav

[organizedchaos]

It hurts, it’s hell coming home from work and your ex tells out of the blue she wants to move out and “loves you but isn’t in love with you anymore (or any variation of this)” . Yep, you’re floored, your heart has been ripped out, smashed and discarded .

 

Worst pain I’ve ever felt. Six months later I’m beginning to appreciate the experience. I’ve been through **** before and have always been able to crawl myself out of it. So far in my life this has been the biggest hole of despair I’ve gotten out of.

 

All r/s are different but here are the things that got me where I’m at now.

 

1. Regardless of what you had with the ex the relationship is DONE. There is nothing you can do about it; begging gets you now where. Somehow I was able to avoid the begging part, don’t know why or how but DON’T do it.

 

2. Your emotions are going to be a mess. Don’t do a god damn thing based on your emotions. Listen to your rational BRAIN. It’s hard but that’s the only thing working right after a breakup. My ex wanted to meet up and talk for a few weeks after she ended it. My emotional part was all “**** ya we can patch this up”, all the while my brain was screaming at me not to do it. I listened to my brain.

 

3. You had a life before you got involved in a relationship with this person. I’ve used this extensively since the bu. The EX doesn’t define YOU. So go out there and re-discover what YOU are looking for.

 

4. Block everything, facebook, twitter, instagram ect…, You have to just do it. It’s hard to sever that connection; it took me a couple months until I blocked her. I wasn’t looking at her facebook page or anything, but her face kept turning up in my friends box. I just got tired of seeing her face so I blocked her. Just DO IT!

 

5. Contact – This is hard but unless its some serious ass **** about wanting to reconcile or provide some kind of closure, ignore everything. You might feel like an ass, but who the **** cares? You owe absolutely nothing to the ex when they decided to check out.

 

Bottom line; this person wanted you out of their life for whatever reason. You owe it to yourself to give them that and just vanish, disappear off the face of the earth and let them deal with it. Maybe you get some “Miss you” or “What’s up” texts ignore it all and keep working on yourself. All this is hard to see initially, but stick with it and you’ll be glad you did.

 

Happy holidays and keep moving on!

 

Trick

 

Bolded for emphasis. Well said and something more people need to understand.

Edited November 30, 2013 by organizedchaos

[Trick1004]

Youve got this nailed down!! Great job. Cav

 

Thanks Cav. I like to think so.

 

To every heartbroken person out there this holiday season, we got through Thanksgiving. Next up Christmas and New Years, enjoy em with people that love and respect you. Don't let your ex ruin your holidays!

 

Trick

[Mariposa10]

This is such an amazing post! Everybody should read it

[melell]

I am at 6 months too. I did exactly what the op listed, and it made things 100000x better.

 

Straight after a breakup it is impossible to even imagine feeling ok with everything. But as long as you do things in your own best interests it really does get better.

 

Thanks op!

[ks0985]

The last part was good for me, not replying to the texts from a ex...your right who gives a **** what they think it was her decision not mine. I feel much better now for not responding to her after reading that part