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Should I Buy Into Her Game?

StringsAttached

By StringsAttached
in Second Chances

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StringsAttached Established Member

StringsAttached

Posted
Posted (edited)

I'll make this short I need advice;

 

Ex dumped me, I went NC for 6 months then messaged her, she wanted to be friends. I agreed. I'm not 100% over her but doing much, much better to the point where I can go long periods of time without talking to her and being ok with it.

 

We're very busy these days and can't talk much. She works until 1AM. I get off at 6PM. So only time we can really talk is Mornings and Nights. I hate mornings, I don't want to talk about anything and she hates nights because she's tired when she comes home from work. We hang out out maybe 4-5 times a month since she lives a couple of hours away.

 

Now she's said she still loves me and yada yada and that there could be a future for us again once I get my Degree and she gets enough money for a lease on her house.

 

The thing is the way she spoke to me today she said 'I can't talk nights. Sorry.' Very formal like. As if I needed to talk to her to get through my day and maintain my well-being...I was polite I said 'No need to apologize, we're both busy i'll call you tomorrow morning'.

 

Now as the dumpee should I buy into her game? She's very proud and arrogant and I know she's saying this so i'll talk to her more as we have only talked maybe 5-10 minutes a day for a month. Should I buy into her game and become her bitch? lol or should I take charge and message her at night so that she won't have control over me anymore?

 

Moreover, it's me who's calling/texting her first. As the dumpee should I just go NC again until she messages me first with material of some substance? And not just one-liners with no significance?

 

I know it's a silly question but you don't know this woman. And I love her.

Edited by StringsAttached
mutualove Established Member

mutualove

Posted
Posted

So,you broke NC,she friend zoned you,tells you she can't text at nights,would you please be my doormat and play by my rules,and you're asking us what to do?

For your own sake go NC again.

  • Like 4
TaraMaiden Established Member

TaraMaiden

Posted
Posted
I'll make this short I need advice;

 

Ex dumped me, I went NC for 6 months then messaged her, she wanted to be friends. I agreed. I'm not 100% over her but doing much, much better to the point where I can go long periods of time without talking to her and being ok with it.

 

We're very busy these days and can't talk much. She works until 1AM. I get off at 6PM. So only time we can really talk is Mornings and Nights. I hate mornings, I don't want to talk about anything and she hates nights because she's tired when she comes home from work. We hang out out maybe 4-5 times a month since she lives a couple of hours away.

 

Now she's said she still loves me and yada yada and that there could be a future for us again once I get my Degree and she gets enough money for a lease on her house.

 

The thing is the way she spoke to me today she said 'I can't talk nights. Sorry.' Very formal like. As if I needed to talk to her to get through my day and maintain my well-being...I was polite I said 'No need to apologize, we're both busy i'll call you tomorrow morning'.

 

Now as the dumpee should I buy into her game? She's very proud and arrogant and I know she's saying this so i'll talk to her more as we have only talked maybe 5-10 minutes a day for a month. Should I buy into her game and become her bitch? lol or should I take charge and message her at night so that she won't have control over me anymore?

 

Moreover, it's me who's calling/texting her first. As the dumpee should I just go NC again until she messages me first with material of some substance? And not just one-liners with no significance?

 

I know it's a silly question but you don't know this woman. And I love her.

 

The fact you're even asking, in spite of clearly marking very good reasons as to why this is a really bad idea.....

Jeesh, you know, I think it's actually possible to change your name to 'doormat' by Deed-Poll....

 

Wise up, man!

 

if you broke up, it's over, period.

Not "It's over when I tell you it's over!"

 

Which is basically what she's telling you..

  • Like 2
Shaine Established Member

Shaine

Posted
Posted

go NC til she contacts you again. It's not good if you're always the one contacting her first. She should initiate contact sometimes.

Right now she has control over you. She knows you will contact her. She might have little respect for you bc of this.

  • Like 2
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StringsAttached Established Member

StringsAttached

Posted
  • Author
Posted
So,you broke NC,she friend zoned you,tells you she can't text at nights,would you please be my doormat and play by my rules,and you're asking us what to do?

For your own sake go NC again.

 

Oh by the Gods...I do feel like a b****. Thanks for making me see it.

  • Like 1
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StringsAttached Established Member

StringsAttached

Posted
  • Author
Posted
The fact you're even asking, in spite of clearly marking very good reasons as to why this is a really bad idea.....

Jeesh, you know, I think it's actually possible to change your name to 'doormat' by Deed-Poll....

 

Wise up, man!

 

if you broke up, it's over, period.

Not "It's over when I tell you it's over!"

 

Which is basically what she's telling you..

 

So going NC will help me take control? I'm an alpha type I want to control! lol

  • Author
StringsAttached Established Member

StringsAttached

Posted
  • Author
Posted
go NC til she contacts you again. It's not good if you're always the one contacting her first. She should initiate contact sometimes.

Right now she has control over you. She knows you will contact her. She might have little respect for you bc of this.

 

Yeah you're right. But she's so damn arrogant, 6 months NC and not a peep from her? Why are you women so prideful!?

TryingToFigureItOut Member

TryingToFigureItOut

Posted
Posted
Yeah you're right. But she's so damn arrogant, 6 months NC and not a peep from her? Why are you women so prideful!?

 

It's not about being prideful, to me she broke up with you and went NC for 6 months with no peep because she literally did not want to speak to you. And if at the slight chance I was wrong, I am definitely know I'm not after her treating you like a doormat after you broke NC and contacted her.

 

You are so under her control it's not even funny. To be honest you probably have turned her off from wanting any sort of reconciliation in the future by acting like her doormat. Girls like men who are strong and won't be there for her every beck and call...it's attractive if a guy resists somewhat.

 

Go NC now before you make things worse for yourself than you already have.

  • Like 2
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StringsAttached Established Member

StringsAttached

Posted
  • Author
Posted
It's not about being prideful, to me she broke up with you and went NC for 6 months with no peep because she literally did not want to speak to you. And if at the slight chance I was wrong, I am definitely know I'm not after her treating you like a doormat after you broke NC and contacted her.

 

You are so under her control it's not even funny. To be honest you probably have turned her off from wanting any sort of reconciliation in the future by acting like her doormat. Girls like men who are strong and won't be there for her every beck and call...it's attractive if a guy resists somewhat.

 

Go NC now before you make things worse for yourself than you already have.

 

Ok I have preparations to make first though I promise I will go back to NC thanks for your advice! :lmao:

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