confusedddd Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Well. I met a guy online and fell in love with him. He left me in may this year. Not until today did I even question if he was a real person or a catfish(fake person) because everything just seemed so real. But a few things always seemed out of place which I never really questioned. All in all, the curiosity is killing me about whether he was a real man or a catfish and I want to know soooooo baddddd because sadly, I loved this person and wasted a good portion of my life on him. We never skyped, we almost did, but he chickened out once and then I stupidly never asked him to do it again because I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable. We never met for various reason(mostly because we would argue the day before and then he would decide to not come anymore, I don't know if this was just his excuse to get out of meeting me) He sent me tonsssss of pics of himself but none were of significance that could say that those were actually all him. Basically now, I've been in NC for 50 days, because he despises me since I begged him like a maniac after the breakup for like 4 months to take me back(AHHHHH I didn't know about NC back then and how it could have saved me so much pain), so I know if I call him, it will either go to voicemail because he won't pick up or he will be mean and say things that will hurt me because his ego would inflate(I know this because before NC he would be mean and condescending as hell because I looked so damn desperate). I feel like I HAVE TO KNOW THOUGH. I know he probably wouldn't actually admit to being a catfish because he probably isn't but I feel like I need the reassurance. Should I call him and just see what happens(because really, after everything I've suffered through, I don't see what could be worse except that his ego would inflate) or let it go and wonder silently for the rest of my life?
Sugarkane Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Why did you never meet in person? It's never a good idea to contact someone for an extended amount of time, without ever meeting them. Because you never know who they are. 1
Author confusedddd Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 Well the distance really, and that we're both very busy. We made multiple plans to meet but every time something would get in the way, mostly an argument, which makes it tough for me to tell if he was using this as an excuse or not because he was fake....because the fights were mostly started by me
Ordinaryday Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Well have you tried the obvious things to find out??? You can google search on ANY image and it will tell you if it was used on any other website. Just save a copy of his image and then paste it in the google iMage search and it will show you if it was used on different websites. Ask him to send you a photo of himself holding a piece of paper in his left hand, between his thumb and index finger, with your name on it. Copy and paste his emails on you and do google searches on them. Scammers just use text templates that easily show up with a google search. I know you weren't scammed out of money, but I am always amazed when I read stories about people conned out of money on a dating site. I would NEVER send money to a stranger I met online, no ifs, buts or maybes. Even if they weren't a scammer the very fact that they are asking for money suggests they can't financially support themselves and why would I want to be in a relationship with someone who can't support themselves? 1
Canadiangirl78 Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Start researching things he's told you about himself. For example, if he told you he graduated from school X, dig into it and see. I'm sure you must have some details about him that you could investigate further. Go all P.I on him and see what you come up with.
elbe Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 How did you fall in love over a computer? I don't understand... He was probably married and living a double life if not something worse. 2
Sugarkane Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 You should make a point to meet them at some point. otherwise they're either a con artist or just a fat old married guy, behind a computer. I saw an ad for a tv show Catfish and just couldn't understand how people were gullible enough to send money to strangers, without ever meeting them. Blew my mind. 1
Author confusedddd Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 That's the other major problem...... I looked up every single picture and most emails and everything that he sent me, they were nowhere else on the internet. And as crazy as this sounds, he is Arabian, so his family was secretive as hell about everything so he doesn't show up on google ANYWHERE, or anyone in his family, but I can find anyone he's ever mentioned as a friend or ex or anything...I tried reaching out to his ex, she never replied I'm thinking I should let this one go....my case is too bizarre
elbe Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 And as crazy as this sounds, he is Arabian, so his family was secretive as hell about everything so he doesn't show up on google ANYWHERE, or anyone in his family, but I can find anyone he's ever mentioned as a friend or ex or anything...I tried reaching out to his ex, she never replied Whoaaa.. not your place! Not your place at all! You have no idea who this person is and need to back off. I get that you feel played but let it rest. You may get more than you ask for with this kind of stalking... 1
Author confusedddd Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 ahhh you are all so right. The relationship is over. I need to let go even if he was fake.. And about falling in love with a computer.... it happens to the best of us
Ordinaryday Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 That's the other major problem...... I looked up every single picture and most emails and everything that he sent me, they were nowhere else on the internet. And as crazy as this sounds, he is Arabian, so his family was secretive as hell about everything so he doesn't show up on google ANYWHERE, or anyone in his family, but I can find anyone he's ever mentioned as a friend or ex or anything...I tried reaching out to his ex, she never replied I'm thinking I should let this one go....my case is too bizarre I read a story about a woman from England who was talking to a man she met on a dating site, he claimed to be from England but in 'Nigeria on business'. She claimed to fall in love with him and she was going to meet him at the airport..., when he had an 'emergency' come up and needed her to send him money to help him out. She ended up sending him her life savings... And yes, it was all a scam, he was a Nigerian scammer. I always take it as a given that EVERYTHING, EVERY SINGLE WORD the person is sending you could be a lie and you have NO WAY OF KNOWING until you have met them IN PERSON. If you never met him then odds are everything was a lie. Sorry. 1
Author confusedddd Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 I read a story about a woman from England who was talking to a man she met on a dating site, he claimed to be from England but in 'Nigeria on business'. She claimed to fall in love with him and she was going to meet him at the airport..., when he had an 'emergency' come up and needed her to send him money to help him out. She ended up sending him her life savings... And yes, it was all a scam, he was a Nigerian scammer. I always take it as a given that EVERYTHING, EVERY SINGLE WORD the person is sending you could be a lie and you have NO WAY OF KNOWING until you have met them IN PERSON. If you never met him then odds are everything was a lie. Sorry. ): I finally agree with this 1
forgetmenot75 Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 I'd say let it go. Too bizarre, as you've said before. Very weird. 2
Recommended Posts