Heard some news that has me down

[mendsley]

So I hung out with a friend today who brought up the ex. He told me how much better her life is, how so many men are gawking over her and how exciting things are. Makes me so to think about all the love I gave, how much I did for her, and how easy I can be forgotten. Don't know why I care, but I do. This sucks :-(

[elbe]

Wow sounds like a GREAT FRIEND! I'm not sure men gawking over her makes her life better.. but maybe it does. Girls move on bro, time for you to move on too.

[AnyaNova]

So I hung out with a friend today who brought up the ex. He told me how much better her life is, how so many men are gawking over her and how exciting things are. Makes me so to think about all the love I gave, how much I did for her, and how easy I can be forgotten. Don't know why I care, but I do. This sucks :-(

 

First thought, you need to establish a clear, "no talk about ex" rule with your friends.

 

Second thought, perhaps I am reading way too much into things here, but it sounds like he is one of the many "gawkers." And that if anyone is excited by her single status, it is perhaps, him.

 

However, with that said, you obviously know him and I don't, so I could be completely wrong!

[mendsley]

Let me clarify, SHE was saying how much better everything is and how she is noticing all these men checking her out. His girlfriend is friends with her and she is saying she's getting sick of talking to her because she is becoming all about herself. He doesn't care for her, but has to because his girlfriend.

 

I wish I could just flip a switch like her and just move on.

[AnyaNova]

Let me clarify, SHE was saying how much better everything is and how she is noticing all these men checking her out. His girlfriend is friends with her and she is saying she's getting sick of talking to her because she is becoming all about herself. He doesn't care for her, but has to because his girlfriend.

 

I wish I could just flip a switch like her and just move on.

 

I see.

 

First thing, is you need to set a clear boundary. No matter how frustrated your friend is with your ex and the friendship between his girlfriend and your ex, you need to make absolutely sure he knows that you cannot hear about it or her at all.

 

And second thing.

 

There will come a day that you will be willing to completely abandon hope. That day, the switch will start to flip for you. You may find yourself as I have, after that point, experiencing some regret or wishing you hadn't made decisions that you had, but when you can abandon all hope, your healing will begin to improve by light years.

[mendsley]

I agree, I need to set some boundaries with him. I also am starting my training on Monday so that will help get rid of this depression. This flu really set me back.