Now I see how important NC is

[ByMyself01]

Well I'm back after a few days of going back and forth with my ex when I said I wanted us to be friends. If you go back and read my other threads you will know my ex left me to work it out with his child's mother.

 

Well, after I had gotten closure from him, we started to talk like we used to on a regular basis throughout the day. He flipped up so many scripts in the past 2 days that I'm emotionally exhausted and made a vow to never look back, not even as friends anymore.

 

He went from telling me he still loves me to saying he still wants to marry me, to telling me that his other other ex was the best woman he ever had, his child's mother then me coming 3rd. He claimed that I wanted him to be alone and now I am getting what I want. He told me to hurry and send his things and to not say anything else to him. I felt so horrible, but it didn't take me back to how I felt at Day 1 of the breakup.

 

He had taken me for a hell of a ride when it comes to my emotions and luckily I know where to start thanks to this board. I SHOULD HAVE listened to others. PLEASE stay NC even if you want them back because it will only give them the power to make or break you.

 

Although NC is for healing purposes, but when we go NC we feel powerful and having power helps with the healing process. The whole time, because I initiated contact, I felt like he had the power over me and he did. He had the power to end it all and he did. So now, I'm picking myself up off the ground once again. I REALLY blocked him from Facebook this time and according to the healing process, I feel like I can take off on Day 10 before I contacted him.

 

PLEASE stay NC. It is a major risk to take with your heart. The ball was in his court and he knew it. He went from saying sweet things to me, we had gotten on webcam and everything and then today, he tells me to not say anything else to him. I'm DEAD, but atleast I've gotten my answers I needed.

[me85]

I'm so sorry. My ex is just as big a douche as yours, in fact, bigger.

 

Hang in there honey! You will be JUST FINE. Believe me. You're better off.

 

I'm starting to feel happiness & it hasn't even been a week of NC, but it's easier to close the door and never look back when you find out they cheated.

 

My ex caused me so much emotional damage too but I feel myself coming alive again. It's great! I'm falling in love with myself again.

 

He always made me feel like I was at fault for everything. I talked too much, I was too loud, "everybody sees it" as he once said to me. What a dick.

 

Before him I had so many friends but he was the reason I lost friends. He didn't want me to have any friends. Just him. Crazy spooky psycho!

 

I'm not bragging but I've never had enemies. People that meet me tell me how awesome I am.

 

So know with every fiber of your being that you are a great person and screw what he thinks because he is an idiot.

 

Happy Thanksgiving!

[me85]

Oh, and I believe in NC so hardcore that I did not even contact him to confront him when I found out about the cheating.

[ByMyself01]

I'm so sorry. My ex is just as big a douche as yours, in fact, bigger.

 

Hang in there honey! You will be JUST FINE. Believe me. You're better off.

 

I'm starting to feel happiness & it hasn't even been a week of NC, but it's easier to close the door and never look back when you find out they cheated.

 

My ex caused me so much emotional damage too but I feel myself coming alive again. It's great! I'm falling in love with myself again.

 

He always made me feel like I was at fault for everything. I talked too much, I was too loud, "everybody sees it" as he once said to me. What a dick.

 

Before him I had so many friends but he was the reason I lost friends. He didn't want me to have any friends. Just him. Crazy spooky psycho!

 

I'm not bragging but I've never had enemies. People that meet me tell me how awesome I am.

 

So know with every fiber of your being that you are a great person and screw what he thinks because he is an idiot.

 

Happy Thanksgiving!

 

Good luck on your journey. Sometimes we just have to keep going and never look back. It is and will be hard, but as long as I stay NC, I keep the power and everyday you make it through it, you get more powerful. But yeah, he definitely pushed me off the edge for good now. Even still, I don't even wish bad on the jerk, I'm more concerned on getting over such a creep.

[ByMyself01]

Oh, and I believe in NC so hardcore that I did not even contact him to confront him when I found out about the cheating.

 

You're a very strong person, I'm the type, I have to have answers, but I need to learn to understand that answers aren't always needed.

[me85]

Yea wishing them ill is a waste of energy. I'd rather use all my energy making myself happy and to heal and live life to the fullest!

[Kizza]

NC is power to ourselves

 

On a weak moment when I thought I was ok I unblocked his facebook page and yes his profile pic was of him and another girl, the one he met around the time he went cold on me.

 

I hurtled so far back to step 1 day 1 so fast in one blink, I was flooded with a number of feelings and since that day I saw that I have thought of him a whole lot more than I was before. I was happier during NC. It has been 3 months, I was doing well and then I sabotaged myself....

 

No matter what if you have to go NC in the first place then there is no amount of time you are ready to break it in any form. Keep it, it was installed for a reason! and believe me it is a hard installation process. Don't break it!

 

Breaking NC serves no positive purpose

Breaking NC breaks your progress

Breaking NC gives them the power and sucks it from you

Breaking NC is starting again

Breaking NC is only torturing yourself

Breaking NC does not allow you to MOVE ON!!

[me85]

You're a very strong person, I'm the type, I have to have answers, but I need to learn to understand that answers aren't always needed.

 

Thank you. I'm only strong because I've gone through so much shhht. lol

 

Oh I promise, I'm the same way. But I got my answer/closure when I found out what a lying manipulative 2 faced cheating ********* he is.

 

My answer to my questions were…because he's seeing someone else. He doesn't want me because he wants to be a male whore and go screw whoever he wants and doesn't love me as he claims.

 

Really my answer/closure was that…he doesn't love me.

 

It hurt, I cried, I got really depressed, I begged and pleaded with him, but the second I found out about the cheating (all the lies & deceit) it was like someone flipped off a switch in me. Then and there I felt all the love I had for him disappear.

Edited November 29, 2013 by me85

[ByMyself01]

Oh I promise, I'm the same way. But I got my answer/closure when I found out what a lying manipulative 2 faced cheating ********* he is.

 

My answer to my questions were…because he's seeing someone else. He doesn't want me because he wants to be a male whore and go screw whoever he wants and doesn't love me as he claims.

 

Really my answer/closure was that…he doesn't love me.

 

It hurt, I cried, I got really depressed, I begged and pleaded with him, but the second I found out about the cheating (all the lies & deceit) it was like someone flipped off a switch in me. Then and there I felt all the love I had for him disappear.

 

Yeah and that's one thing I can't stand is cheating. And unfortunately for me, I had realize not only was he not my man, he's not his child's mother man either because the day he left my house, he was already trying to cheat with other women on FB but at that point, it wasn't my concern because he was already leaving to her.

[me85]

Gosh, let me ask you…is he an attractive guy who KNOWS he's attractive ? because my ex is and he KNOWS he is and those are THE WORST guys out there.

 

Those are the ones who cheat, lie, hurt girls the most I think.

 

One word : Narcissism.

[ByMyself01]

Gosh, let me ask you…is he an attractive guy who KNOWS he's attractive ? because my ex is and he KNOWS he is and those are THE WORST guys out there.

 

Those are the ones who cheat, lie, hurt girls the most I think.

 

One word : Narcissism.

 

No he's an average guy with low self esteem and depression.

[2fargone]

Gosh, let me ask you…is he an attractive guy who KNOWS he's attractive ? because my ex is and he KNOWS he is and those are THE WORST guys out there.

 

Those are the ones who cheat, lie, hurt girls the most I think.

 

One word : Narcissism.

 

 

 

Ow cmon... I'm an atractive guy. Not by looks, but by the way I am. I'm sure I'm not the worst out there

[me85]

Ow cmon... I'm an atractive guy. Not by looks, but by the way I am. I'm sure I'm not the worst out there

 

but are you full of yourself?

 

I'm talkin about vanity here.

 

correction: they CAN be the worst kind of guys.

[2fargone]

but are you full of yourself?

 

I'm talkin about vanity here.

 

correction: they CAN be the worst kind of guys.

 

 

 

I'm not full of myself. I'm just well aware of my own qualities and shortcomings.

[me85]

I'm not full of myself. I'm just well aware of my own qualities and shortcomings.

 

So your confident, not cocky…

 

Big difference.

 

& if you're aware of your shortcomings that's great because narcissists don't believe they have any shortcomings.