fifipheebs Posted November 27, 2013 Posted November 27, 2013 all right. there's this guy i have suspicions may have feelings. we are somewhat good friends. in the past his friends have alluded to him having a thing for me. he was hanging with this chick and i dont like her. he stopped hanging around her after he knew i didnt care for her. now he's hanging around her agin like hes tryign to punish me for a crime i dont know committed. why would a guy all of a sudden ignore you to be hanging around this other chick when just a week ago he was calling you everyday? 1
PegNosePete Posted November 27, 2013 Posted November 27, 2013 Maybe he was waiting for you to ask him out, but you didn't so he moved on? Just an idea. You haven't given nearly enough information for anyone to be able to determine his motivations. Here's an outlandish idea, how about maybe talking to him? 1
Author fifipheebs Posted November 27, 2013 Author Posted November 27, 2013 Maybe he was waiting for you to ask him out, but you didn't so he moved on? Just an idea. You haven't given nearly enough information for anyone to be able to determine his motivations. Here's an outlandish idea, how about maybe talking to him? im too afraid to talk to him as im scared i could be reading ths all wrong and he laughs in my face. he seems to vascillate back and forth all the time with me. either being v. attentive or v. aloof. I feel like when he's v. attentive he pulls aways right after and doesnt even give me a chance to reciporate back positively and assumes the worst.
d0nnivain Posted November 27, 2013 Posted November 27, 2013 There are ways to make it clear to a guy that if he asks you out, the answer will be yes. Those techniques vary by situation but you if you aren't willing to make the 1st direct move, by asking him out, then you need to communicate to him that he has a green light. I'd touch him more when you talk in person & initiate a few contacts in between. 1
Author fifipheebs Posted November 27, 2013 Author Posted November 27, 2013 There are ways to make it clear to a guy that if he asks you out, the answer will be yes. Those techniques vary by situation but you if you aren't willing to make the 1st direct move, by asking him out, then you need to communicate to him that he has a green light. I'd touch him more when you talk in person & initiate a few contacts in between. i'll try but any idea why a guy (in general) would sudenly go back to flirting with the girl he knows you hate? she's been extremely smug since he started talking to her again.
d0nnivain Posted November 27, 2013 Posted November 27, 2013 Because he knows it will get a rise out of you. 2
stillafool Posted November 27, 2013 Posted November 27, 2013 A better question is why would a guy who is interested in you hang out with another girl? If he wants to be with you why wouldn't he just hang out with you?
Author fifipheebs Posted November 27, 2013 Author Posted November 27, 2013 Because he knows it will get a rise out of you. i think youre right. he has a way of getting a rise out of me. he knows what will work. 1
Author fifipheebs Posted November 27, 2013 Author Posted November 27, 2013 A better question is why would a guy who is interested in you hang out with another girl? If he wants to be with you why wouldn't he just hang out with you? i share the same sentiment as you stillafool. but could it be that hollywood movies and books have conditioned us to believe that way - if he wants to be with us he will? I feel so however, if the guy can't read us girls would he stlil want to put himself out there? i am shy be nature and even when he approaches me to have conversation, i shy away as i'm nervous. he may read into it as not intersted or can't be bothered when really i am elated inside.
stillafool Posted November 27, 2013 Posted November 27, 2013 I see what you're saying. Especially if you are shy when he approaches you. Perhaps you can reveal your feelings to him (I know this is hard because you are shy) because you don't want to look back and think what if I did. I say go for it. 1
Author fifipheebs Posted November 28, 2013 Author Posted November 28, 2013 hi fifipheebs, oooo-wee! now is your chance! trust your intuition about his motive to punish you. the standoff is a wondrous place to be! draw your guns & call his bluff, show him what you've got. think about what you don't like about the other woman & emphasize those qualities of yours that are superior to those you don't like in her. he should pick up that comparison if it's done without ambiguity. no! time to be a big girl, make the big girl moves & accept the big girl consequences & chance of big reward. this is what love is all about: growing pains. change or die. love isn't for the weak. j woah! okay. time to "woman-up' and get this.
Author fifipheebs Posted November 28, 2013 Author Posted November 28, 2013 do you think its possible he doesnt know what he wants hence the wandering between girls?
Author fifipheebs Posted November 28, 2013 Author Posted November 28, 2013 All right. I'm giving up. He saw that I was not feeling well but did not bother to come over to inquire if all as fine. The least he could've done was inquire as a friend but alas he did not even do such a thing. I believe this shows me clearly how he feels about me which is he does not even want me in his life period. I cannot fathom any other reason for such a slight such as that.
894hjk Posted November 28, 2013 Posted November 28, 2013 This is how it was between my bf and me at the start. He has a fear of rejection and he finds it easier to get confirmation that u like him though making you jealous. U will need to ask him out. Do it casually but friendly to. 1
Keenly Posted November 28, 2013 Posted November 28, 2013 All right. I'm giving up. He saw that I was not feeling well but did not bother to come over to inquire if all as fine. The least he could've done was inquire as a friend but alas he did not even do such a thing. I believe this shows me clearly how he feels about me which is he does not even want me in his life period. I cannot fathom any other reason for such a slight such as that. Really...? This was your test ? Just ask him out already. You are blaming him while doing absolutely nothing about it. 1
Author fifipheebs Posted November 28, 2013 Author Posted November 28, 2013 I decided as such for one: in the past he had shown true concern. He was able to see when I was not ok and usually ran over to check up on me. He did no such thing lately. I feel he replies to my emails out of politeness now rather than happy to hear from me. He's had opportunities to hang out with me. Sometimes he takes it, sometimes he doesn't. I understand he could have a life outside of me. I'm so torn. It's like tug of war: one side says ask him out the other side says drop him.
Author fifipheebs Posted November 28, 2013 Author Posted November 28, 2013 Should i add I dropped a grad program class today so I don't have to see him hanging around this other girl.
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