harmony13 Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 My heart will not allow me to move on. Here's the story.... my ex left me for another woman (that's still legally married) 8 months ago. I heard he's renting a townhome and her and her kids have moved in. He and I were together for 7 years and one day I came home from work and his belongings were gone. He left no note, nothing. Although I have gotten a little better emotionally, I'm certainly not 100%. Especially with the holidays here. We have not spent not one holiday apart during the entire time we were in a relationship. So I'm struggling right now with this reality. He still reaches out from time to time but no promises have been made. He'll just send a text here and there saying 'Hello' or 'Hello Beautiful', etc.. It's almost like he's teasing me. He did call three weeks ago saying he still thinks about me and he didn't want closure. That was the last serious conversation he and I had about each other. We haven't had much communication since so now I'm left 'wondering'. Anyway although it's been almost a year since we split up part of me is having a really hard time letting go. I know deep down it's the right thing to do but it's hard. It's really sad because it's gotten to the point where I'm really lonely and if I see other happy couples, it saddens me. Not because they are happy but because that's what I want to experience with my ex. I just don't know what to do. It's like I'm stuck emotionally and can't move forward. Sorry for the long post but I just had to release this burden I've been carrying. Thanks for reading. :-)
RDawg Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 oh my word that is just awful, I feel for you. But please, cut this man out of your life, how can you let him continue to hurt you? Read all the stuff on this site, you'll get the central theme of NO CONTACT, heal yourself, love yourself and move on with your life!! No one has the right to determine your own happiness, only you. I know we are all co dependent to a degree but please try and start fighting for your own recovery. Why on earth would you allow someone to hurt you like this?
Author harmony13 Posted November 26, 2013 Author Posted November 26, 2013 You're so right. I know the art of no contact is very effective. I RARELY reach out to him. He will send a text or maybe a phone call at least once a week. However, he hasn't texted me in about two weeks so now I'm wondering what he's doing, will he text me soon, etc... I know, it is complete torture but I'm still emotionally tied to this man. I don't always respond but sometimes I will. I'm afraid if I ignore him completely, all communication will be lost for good. I truly wish I was strong enough not worry about it but the pain is still there. I know I need to do something because I can't go on like this.
RDawg Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 Shame harmony. I don't really know what more to say. In a way it's nice to know that I'm not the only one who feels so at a loss to give up on loving someone. What is the longest you have gone without making contact? But I mean really, this guy sounds terrible - what sort of a relationship is he giving this new woman if he is still maintaining contact with you? He sounds like he enjoys keeping control over you. You know that is horrible but you still want to love him??
Author harmony13 Posted November 26, 2013 Author Posted November 26, 2013 The longest we've gone without contact is about 2 1/2 weeks.
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