HOPE2005 Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 hi all how u doing i have been patient for a long time and needed t talk t someone and thank god i found this forum maybe i can get some answers. i have known this man fo almost 3 YEARS befor we got married and i knew his situation he still lives in his familly house working in his late father's barbershop .SO ITS NOT EVEN HIS besiness.wich bring us to the financial problems .being a familly besiness he is obliged to give a percentage of the money he earn to his mother.that bothers me a lot cause this way we could never save to have a place of our own the bitter thing is that i noticed that my husband is not exited in getting out and having a place of our own as iam .to the point that we often argue about this subjet i always tell him that i do not wanna live with his familly any more and iam going t leave him if he does not seak for a solution for us . A LOT of time iam thinking of leaving him and this house.Other times iam thinks should i give him a chance to fix this .iam sick and tired of this situation i wanna get out of this house but we have an 8 month old baby together and he still says that he loves me and he thinks about that every day and if he had money he would get us out of this house ....but iam jUst tired and can not wait any more ; i do not know what to do.
Philosoraptor Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 Sounds like you should have considered this before you married and had a child with him. I think you'd be best to communicate in a calm manner your concerns and have a mature conversation with him about these issues. Once you have talked to him it will clear up a lot of these assumptions and help you choose which path to go down.
Shaine Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 If he had the money he would get you out of that house. I agree with philosoraptor. Talk calmly. Dont escalate this to a fight. Nothing good will come of this.
r321148 Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 So did you not know the situation with his family business before you got married? You said you dated for 3 years. Did it not ever come up in conversation that he gave money to his mother? Did you not discuss the financial implications of it all? It sounds like you need to work on your communication. If you weren't ok with his situation then why marry him and have a kid with him? I think you need to talk to him about this. I don't really see how the situation is going to resolve itself though. If you don't have the money then you don't have the money. You can't really stop him giving money to his mother as she probably has some stake in the business. I guess you are taking care of your kid so there is no possibility of you working? There are 2 choices really. Stick it out or don't. In order to stick it out I guess you'd need to be able to see potential for change in the future so maybe explore how and when things might change.
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