my boyfriend and his mothers relationship is driving me crazy

[alw23586]

I have been with my boyfriend almost 2yrs. We have had a very crazy up and down relationship i feel that alot of that is bc of his mother. He 28 yrs old and his mother treats him like hes 12 half the time and her man the rest of time. He moved in wit me after the first couple months of us dating. During that time his mom was going crazy we never had any peace, we couldnt do anything that she wasnt blowing his phone up. She even start saying she was bein haunted basically. Calling begging him to come home. Wgen he didnt she would say he didnt care about her, she was alone and noone cared that maybe she would just die. I mean she called i know atleast 10 or more times a day. In between that she was texting if he didnt answer she would scream and yell at him. She wouldwas text him telling him to send her pics him. And say howi unhappy he looked and he would feedu into it while and hes on your phone wit her get off phone i ask if somethings wrong he would say no i just say that. She even ran her mouth to bcu he was posting i love u stuff on my fb. And he took down the pic of him and i and put up a pic of him and her. Well i had enough of that so i told him it was getting a lil crazy now. I mean at first i thouggt maybe its just bc he started staying wit me she wasnt use to it but after a yr you would think it calm down. I told him it had to stop i was tires of not evening being able to have sex witout his phone blowing up and him having to explain what he was doin reason he didnt answer. So it calmed down for a lil she still called all day long but not as bad. Then i lost my job and we moved in to help my parents it got bad again. She would call and set up dates with him. Never wanted me to go just her and him. After a date one night i seen a text from her that said thank you i really need that and his response was i kbow mom me too ...i thought that was lil strange but i didnt really say anything.. but i asked what did she really need, he said she just wanted spend time wit me. Now we stay at his moms some and i try to deal wit everything but the other day i got off from work early was going to suprize him bc he told me his mom wasnt home. I went to door and botj of them was running into garage, her hair was a mess matted to her head on one side and she was straighten her pants she seemed really nervous. He was at bak of the car in garage couldnt tell what he was doin but he wouldnt look at me or even say anything for the first 45 mins i was there. I felt like i had walked into something i shouldnt have. He told me that she just got there 15 mins before i did, but there is no way she was out in public looking like that.Since weve been dtaying there our sex life is like gone. He deletes his messages and phone calls from her. This is really aggravating me bc i feel wrong for thinking like this but omg i feel like something else is goin on. I have told him how i feel and he tells me im crazy that him and his mom are just close and im jealous of thier relationship. I have told him that i cant live like this anymore and i waz moving on but i keep thinking was i in the wrong? I love him and he tells me he cant stand how she acts sometimes but does nothing but feed into her.Someone help am i wrong in thinking this?

[Grumpybutfun]

alw:

Can you provide some background like where is his father? Is she dating anyone else? I thought at first maybe she was just a hover mother, but after you described the scene where you interrupted and they were running into garage, I thought maybe they were having sex or at least making out. Is it possible he provides the husband role to her? Unfortunately, it does happen that when a mother's husband dies or leaves her she grooms her son to replace him for emotional and sexual needs.

You are not wrong in thinking it because just from what you described I thought it too.

Grumps

[nevergoodenough]

I have been with my boyfriend almost 2yrs. We have had a very crazy up and down relationship i feel that alot of that is bc of his mother. He 28 yrs old and his mother treats him like hes 12 half the time and her man the rest of time. He moved in wit me after the first couple months of us dating. During that time his mom was going crazy we never had any peace, we couldnt do anything that she wasnt blowing his phone up. She even start saying she was bein haunted basically. Calling begging him to come home. Wgen he didnt she would say he didnt care about her, she was alone and noone cared that maybe she would just die. I mean she called i know atleast 10 or more times a day. In between that she was texting if he didnt answer she would scream and yell at him. She wouldwas text him telling him to send her pics him. And say howi unhappy he looked and he would feedu into it while and hes on your phone wit her get off phone i ask if somethings wrong he would say no i just say that. She even ran her mouth to bcu he was posting i love u stuff on my fb. And he took down the pic of him and i and put up a pic of him and her. Well i had enough of that so i told him it was getting a lil crazy now. I mean at first i thouggt maybe its just bc he started staying wit me she wasnt use to it but after a yr you would think it calm down. I told him it had to stop i was tires of not evening being able to have sex witout his phone blowing up and him having to explain what he was doin reason he didnt answer. So it calmed down for a lil she still called all day long but not as bad. Then i lost my job and we moved in to help my parents it got bad again. She would call and set up dates with him. Never wanted me to go just her and him. After a date one night i seen a text from her that said thank you i really need that and his response was i kbow mom me too ...i thought that was lil strange but i didnt really say anything.. but i asked what did she really need, he said she just wanted spend time wit me. Now we stay at his moms some and i try to deal wit everything but the other day i got off from work early was going to suprize him bc he told me his mom wasnt home. I went to door and botj of them was running into garage, her hair was a mess matted to her head on one side and she was straighten her pants she seemed really nervous. He was at bak of the car in garage couldnt tell what he was doin but he wouldnt look at me or even say anything for the first 45 mins i was there. I felt like i had walked into something i shouldnt have. He told me that she just got there 15 mins before i did, but there is no way she was out in public looking like that.Since weve been dtaying there our sex life is like gone. He deletes his messages and phone calls from her. This is really aggravating me bc i feel wrong for thinking like this but omg i feel like something else is goin on. I have told him how i feel and he tells me im crazy that him and his mom are just close and im jealous of thier relationship. I have told him that i cant live like this anymore and i waz moving on but i keep thinking was i in the wrong? I love him and he tells me he cant stand how she acts sometimes but does nothing but feed into her.Someone help am i wrong in thinking this?

 

If you are not ok with the way he acts, the only choice you have is to break up. He appears to be hiding things, but that isn't going to change. You can either accept things as they are and stay or end things for what you are going through. The choice is yours, but it doesn't sound like you can trust him.