purplesoccer34 Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 I met this guy almost 3 years ago when I was a sophomore in college. Immediately after that, he told all his friends that he was completely infatuated with me, and his friends told me that. A few months later, he asked me out and I let him down nicely. I've never had an interest in this guy whatsoever. But it didn't end there---even after that, he would go out of his way to hang out with me alone, would go crazy if I went even a day without talking to him online, would stand extra close to me when with a group of people and things like that. He asked me out several times actually, and in the past 3 years I had to tell him 3 or 4 times that I'm just not interested in him. I tried to keep my distance, but he would go crazy if I didn't talk to him. He backed off a bit when I got into a relationship with someone else, but now that my ex and I have broken up, he's back to doing what he used to do. He asks me to hang out with him alone, stands super extra close to me when we're with a group of people (he puts his arm around my shoulders or back too), and gives me way too much attention in a group setting. All I want is some personal space. I also have a close group of friends that I always go out with, and he's a part of this group. I just wish he would treat me like he treats every other girl in the group but his attention is almost entirely on me all the time. On the flip side, this guy has gone out of his way for me SO much. He has sacrificed so much to make me happy when I never even asked for it. He's done more for me than any guy I have ever dated. This is why it's so hard for me to talk to him, but do you think I should tell him anyway that it would be nice to have some personal space? I don't really know how else to tell him that I don't like him...I've already told him that several times in the past.
Jame22 Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 Why can't you just stop talking to him? If he goes crazy that's his problem, not yours.
Emissary Posted November 26, 2013 Posted November 26, 2013 It's sad to say, but perhaps he is beyond reason. If you are truthful in that you have explicitly told him you're not interested several times, then there is no good approach left to take. If he is beyond reason, then perhaps for his own good, you too must go beyond reason. You must break him. There's something about you that he has clasped onto and just can't seem to let that go, you must shatter that visage he has of you, even if he ends up hating you, one day he may forgive you. It sounds cruel, but it's ultimately more cruel allowing this to continue; the pain he must feel is undoubtedly gut wrenching, put him out of his misery.
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