JohnnyLoverBoy Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 For those who Broke No Contact for the first time can you guys share how the conversation went through? Even if your ex break the no contact please share the conversation.. Let this be a lesson for people who planning to break or respond to your exe's
chris21422 Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 Ex gf broke no contact after 3 weeks. Her: Hi! How are you? Heard about bad weather in your hometown is everyone ok I mean your family? Me: I'm doing great and they are fine. Thanks (Responded after 12 hrs she message 8PM I replied 6AM) LOL! No reply from her though.. hehe I guess my response is blunt or cold For those who Broke No Contact for the first time can you guys share how the conversation went through? Even if your ex break the no contact please share the conversation.. Let this be a lesson for people who planning to break or respond to your exe's
melell Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 The conversation could be read into from lots of angles. But ultimately it was just a reminder of the fact that the relationship was dead. I only ever responded, never initiated. Still made me feel bad, reminded me it was over. My ex came back, still felt bad. Reminded me that the past was dead. Regardless, I think it never feels good. It is never worth it in any context (at least not in the first 6 months for me). I think that most of us that break nc learn this lesson for ourselves, and really it is a good lesson to learn. 1
Shaine Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 Broke NC after 2 days. I tried being friends with him so it wont be too sudden for me. He said, 'it's your choice, but if i were you i wouldnt. So it's easier for you to forget me. Hahaha..'
ks0985 Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 Broke NC after 2 days. I tried being friends with him so it wont be too sudden for me. He said, 'it's your choice, but if i were you i wouldnt. So it's easier for you to forget me. Hahaha..' pretty conceited response from him 3
chris21422 Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 lol that's alpha Broke NC after 2 days. I tried being friends with him so it wont be too sudden for me. He said, 'it's your choice, but if i were you i wouldnt. So it's easier for you to forget me. Hahaha..'
Kermit76 Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 Yep. Been posting all weekend myself. Broke NC after 3 months. A big step back for me but after 3 days feeling slightly better. Back to NC.*I hope my experience helps people looking to break NC.*Dumped after 2 years after a wedding. Dumped out of the blue.*Second time she broke up with me.*Here is living proof not to break NC. Word for word how it went.*Me - how are things?*Her - working on myself. Hope u are too. (text came 5 hrs later).*Me - how is work (i texted back in 10 min.. Don't care about time frame of response)*Her - going well. My self improving is helping. (3 hrs later)*Me - u have stuff of mine. I have stuff of yours. If u want it back.*Her - ok. ThanksMe - knew u had that cd of mine.*Her - this is too soon for me. Maybe in the future.*Me - what u mean? No problem.*Her - have a good holiday. Be well.*Me - u too. Any plans?*No response. Never once asked about me.
todreaminblue Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 i dont break no contact, they do and normally it is when i am receptive they seem to know....i make it easy .....and i am never blunt or cold....there isnt someone in my past i would say i havent forgiven..... there is someone in my now i am not talking to .....but that is for his sake as well...it is what he wants....i wont break no contact.. .deb 1
chris21422 Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 Another ex gf. She broke up with me march 2011 Her: Hi Chris! (June 2011 Didn't respond) Her: Chris, where is Bruno? (our dog) can i get him? (July 2011 Didn't respond) Her: Hello chris how are you? (August 2011 Didn't respond) Her: Holla! (October 2011 Didn't respond) Her: Chris Hello how are you? (November 2011 She saw I'm in new relationship with a new girl I didn't respond) Her: Merry Christmas (December 2011 Didn't respond) That's the last one.. hehe she finally gave up.. She is probably wondering why a beautiful girl like her and I'm just ignoring her.. but the truth is her attitude stinks.. I rather date a normal looking girl than to date or even respond to her. 1
chris21422 Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 Thanks man! the day I realize that I just love her for her looks. That's the day I told myself I will ignore this girl from now on and I deserve better.. Very inspiring Chris. Lol. 1
Kermit76 Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 Same here Chris. My BU is just recent. But she is very attractive, But can't hide what's beneath her good looks. Feel sorry for the next guy to have to find out the hard way.
Purepony Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 Me : sent letter on media site because her controlling ex that made her change email and me trying to make amends and maybe maybe.... re connect but i have no hope. Her: if you need anything, see my mom and deletes acct Me: * lol now i know she deserves this guy who treats her like crap
Simon Phoenix Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 Once I committed to NC fully (had a nearly a month of pseudo-NC that was broken because we had a prearranged weekend together) I didn't break it until I was fine with whatever happened. I sent an inside joke via text, she responded happily and asked how I was, we chatted for a bit via text. Wasn't a big deal but had I not done the proper NC work, I might have read too much into it or gotten way too excited/emotional.
cavalier99 Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 I broke NC only after recovering 100 percent. It went fine in terms of catching up on our new RS's ecetera. and being friendly. So i dont think this thread applies to me becuase at that point I didnt need NC. So essentially I never broke NC imo. I was hare core all the way until indifference which is the goal. Cav 1
2fargone Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 I'm actually planning to, but I won't for another 2 months. And it's because of something very specific that she is the only person I know has an area of expertise in. Certainly not to get her back. I'm giving it two months because for me it also envolves a certain change of lifestyle, and I need to think about that some more. Meanwhile I might still find another way than asking her a favor
Never Again Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 One of my threads says it all, but I responded when she initiated (rarely) over the first 4 months post BU. It hurt like hell, and in hindsight was a huge mistake, but I convinced myself it was for the best to keep things comfortable for mutual friends that were getting married. One of these friends had actively tried to get us back together and it made things weird. If I had gone complete NC and asked my friend to keep her trap shut, things would've been a lot better. Alas. Then my ex chased me around their wedding as if she was interested (to the point where an overprotective friend had to keep her away from me), told me we'd talk soon and should grab dinner. That was 45 days ago, and I've committed to NC since. I'm way behind on my healing because I let myself respond to her antics.
bobby326 Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 Lets see, the first month was horrible for me, literally made all the wrong choices and mistakes, I wish I would have found this site earlier so I could have avoided it. 1 week post BU, met with her in person, cried my eyes out, begged, pleaded, she just sat there emotionless and telling me how she is much happier. 2 weeks post BU, sent a very long email basically saying a lot of the same things I said in person, she responded with a very harsh text basically telling me it's over, stop trying, forget about us. Almost 1 month post BU, got REALLY drunk, checked the find my iphone tracker thing (i told her I knew her PW, she never changed it, I had it to find her phone when we lived together as she lost her phone all the time), saw she was at a bar next to me, texted her some messed up stuff, apologized profusely the next morning. Said a bunch of garbage about how well I was doing, no idea if she actually believed it but who cares. 1 Month and 1 week post BU, knew she was coming over to pick up a credit card that was mailed to my house, late the night before backed all of her photos up on a DVD, just wrote her name, and from me. When she took the credit card and left the DVD, texted her acting like I don't care and that there was nothing on the DVD except photos, she acted like I put something on there like a love note or something, said some mean stuff along the lines of don't flatter yourself, she said a lot of nasty things to me like I'm a dick, ******* etc. After that nasty text convo I have been strict NC, she sent a text giving condolences for my grandfather dieing a few weeks after that, I just responded thank you. That was on October 18th, the text convo was October 2nd so I guess I have been NC since October 2nd. I def feel much better and avoiding finding anything out about her, especially avoiding FB has helped me more than anything. Don't mean to write so much but putting it all down is therapeutic, so venting helps me. I feel crappy that I broke NC so many times and did all the wrong things but at least I have initiated NC and have stuck to it for almost 2 months. I have also decided that I will NOT respond to any text messages that I may receive in the future, the only thing I think I will ever get is maybe a merry xmas, I will not respond. It will be exactly 3 months since the BU tomorrow, I suppose having a rough first month and doing all the wrong things is a stage, I still think of her everyday and wonder a lot if she ever thinks about me or if she will ever truly apologize to me but I know I have no control over what she does so avoiding any info about her helps me in the sense that ANYTHING I find out will just hurt, NOTHING will make me feel better so why know? I just hope I can continue to stay strong and maintain it, so far so good.
Author JohnnyLoverBoy Posted November 25, 2013 Author Posted November 25, 2013 great stories guys.. keep them coming
Haydn Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 Nice thread. I am at 4 months. 1st week did all the sad sad things. I will wait for you etc...You are so special......Please dont leave. God i should have just painted a bullseye on my face! Then i gave up completely resolved myself to a monk like existence with the weekends free! 2 month....She tries to contact me through bloody mutual friends. I get excited and am just about to blow NC when a tiny voice tells me. If she wants something why cant she just ask me? Anyway turns out she wanted smething for herself so her selfishness was still the same. 3 month. The worst time for me. Just when i thought was sort of ok i had weeks of self doubt and wondering, does she miss me? (Yawn) Now, i am moving into the indifference stage, Oh sure i still think about her but i also cringe when i think about all those sad things i did to get her back. I would advise anyone not to send any nasty texts or emails. Its all power to them if you do. As for christmas i shall send her a hand grenade. (Not)
sarbunoemi Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 I broke NC after 1 month of post-breakup telling his mother "Happy Birthday" and wishing him a good day and even asked him if he wants to hang out. He said "OK." and after that I didn't respond for about another month. After another month, he saw me at my cousin's wedding. After two days, he called me: He: Hey, how are you doing? Anything new? Me (while working out) : Oh Hey, I am doing very good - working out and stuff. You? He: That's cool. I am doing good too. I saw you at the wedding. Me: Where did you see me? He: At the park. Wanted to call you but I didn't have the cell to call you. Me: (I saw him of course but I was pretending to be stupid) I see. The wedding was great, finally learned to dance and it was fun also. (Told him about the games and all and about my cousin's friends too) He: .... Me: By the way, how are you? He: Well, I am feeling very tired because I need to study. I didn't slept well too... Me: Oh, it must be hard to study and all. How do you bear it? He: I drink a lot of coke. My girl friend,Kristine saw you at the Christian camp. Do you know her? Me: I see. No I don't know her. The Christian camp was fun too because ...(telling him how great it was that I have made so many friends yada yada) He: .... Me: And I am also going to Sepsiszentgyorgy to meet my favorite Hungarian singer ) He: .... Me: Started to workout with my friends - jogging, playing tennis and basketball and weight lifting too (...) What about you? He: I need to start to workout too...Need to go, good evening. Me: Oh, okay. Well I wish you good luck on your studying oh and....it's good night, not good evening. Anyway, bye. After 1 month of Nc, he text me calling me :"little singer" and was very very friendly. I was cold. I replied after 9 hours: He: Hey little singer, I saw you in TV ^.^ How have you been? Me: (after9 hours) Good. He: What are you doing? Me: Drawing. He: What are you drawing? Me: A poster. He: For what? Me: For prom. He: You don't seem very talkative. ^.^ Me: I am not talkative because I am not in the mood. He: Fine then, text me if you want to talk and when you are in the mood. (after 5 hours I blocked him of Fb and deleted his number too. After 2 days I changed my Sim card because my older one had a defect.) Well, I feel better since I blocked him. I don't hate nor I like him, I feel fine and free now
30andsad Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 I've never really gotten into full on NC with the latest. It'll be NC for 5-6 days, but we lived in the same house so there's had to be LC to get everything sorted out. I tried to initiate a friendly text regarding the Doctor Who 50th since we had both been so excited about it. She responded fine, wasn't cold, but wasn't warm either and 5-6 hours later on each text. I'll probably let it go for good soon and fall into full NC. It just sucks because I know how it goes from previous relationships. In a year's time this wonderful person I've shared 4 years with and who holds a special place in my heart will be nothing more than a stranger to me. I know it's ideal for the healing and it's coming real soon, but still sucks.
chris21422 Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 Are you saying you made him come back to you by talking to him everyday? Actually reading some of the BU with guys' posts makes me realise that it is me that has kept the relationship going, it is me that makes him come back or so that is what guys like to believe?Why stop talking to someone you still love though?
nerdlingZA Posted November 25, 2013 Posted November 25, 2013 after 4m0nths of me begging she br0ke NC Her: hey how u doing ? Me: i'am fine Her: i took your earphones from your friend , can i keep them ? Me: no i want them back Her: pleasse! Me: only if u kiss me ¿ Her: why wud u want a kiss 4rm sum1 u d0nt love ? Me: i dont love you ? Her: you know you never change Me: k.
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