bnh Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 (edited) I started dating a new guy, we met unexpectedly online, just from a music forum, and we really hit it off, we were sending loads of emails every day and we can talk for hours and hours on the phone. We've seen each other about 8 times in total, and we always end up having sex. But it's long distance and we only see each other once every two weeks. This has caused me to have doubts, when we're together he makes me happy and I want to make it work, but when we're apart the doubts creep back in; I wonder if this really counts as a relationship seeing someone so infrequently, and other stuff along those lines. If I were to be really honest with myself this situation isn't making me feel very happy and I know that he likes me more than I like him. We were talking on the phone last night, all sorts of conversation topics, when he starts saying randomly which famous people he finds really attractive. And proceeds to say "I reeeeeeeally do like the look of... (it was Scarlett Johannson). Now obviously, everyone has celebrity crushes and I'm not any sort of psycho control freak or anything, everyone had people they find attractive, myself included.... But it was just the random way that he brought it up that got my back up, and then when he proceeded to say which celebrity, I got an awful sinking feeling in my stomach, because she is blonde with big tits and I'm a brunette with small tits. So I said to him, do you mind if we don't continue this talk, it's not making me feel too good. And I said I know it's not rational, and I'm probably just being oversensitive. I know I can be oversensitive and I hurt easily but this is the way I've always been. He was very apologetic, I could tell he was upset that he hurt me, and said he can be a big stupid oaf at times. Now I know I just need to put this out of my mind, but today I just feel down and rubbish, like it's taken a chunk out of my self esteem and I need a bit of time to lick my wounds. I thought when I woke up and had slept on it, I would just think, oh don't be daft girl, it's you he's with and everyone has celebrity crushes, but when I woke up I felt worse about it. He sent me a text this morning saying he wishes he was there to kiss me and hold me as we wake up, and I just felt like 'piss off' and deleted it from my phone. I think it's because the problem with long-distance relationships is that they cause doubts in people's minds and I feel like this has added to my doubts. It's not that he fancies Scarlett Johannsen, it's the fact that she looks nothing like me, and it just makes me unhappy that maybe how I look is not what really floats his boat. Everyone deserves to feel like they're beautiful and No.1 to their partner. Am I just being an oversensitive delicate stupid little flower that needs to get a grip, or do you think my feelings are justified? I just wish he hadn't planted this blonde, big tits thing in my mind. No way would I have said anything like that to him. Maybe if he'd said it way down the line when we'd established a relationship, I would have been able to brush it off and laugh about it, maybe tell him who my crushes are, but saying it this early on, I just feel like he's spoiled it. I did at one time have quite low self esteem and have made very good progress with building it back up to a healthy level, but I guess there's still work to be done. Edited November 24, 2013 by bnh typo's
SincereOnlineGuy Posted November 24, 2013 Posted November 24, 2013 answered your other, identical post, if it matters.
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